I found this forum through Wikipedia of all places. I'm also going to resist the urge to make any of these details specific lest someone come across this and recognize any of them.
I am a non-traditional student who has recently endured two break-ups, one as breaker and the other as breakee. I feel horrible about both of them.
I was in a long-term (more than one year less than five) live-in relationship with someone I met online. When we met I was in a bad place, feeling depressed and directionless. She was presumably lonely as well, though she went on dates she never had a relationship before. We eventually met and I moved to be with her. She helped me find a job, enroll in school. Things started out great, naturally, but as time went on cracks appeared, as they'll appear in at least half of marriages and who knows how many other relationships.
I suppose I felt things getting stagnant. I felt I, and we, weren't growing, spending too much time at home or online. Both being shy, we didn't meet too many new people and spent probably too much time together. I didn't feel the same spark as I once did, and she noticed, causing many serious talks and ending with promises.
I met someone in a class this year and began to correspond with her. As time went on she expressed an interest in me, and I felt one in her as well. Eventually my previous ex sensed my growing distance, and after a discussion we agreed on a "break", wherein I moved out and we would see what would happen. I began to date the younger, newer girl.
I didn't tell my previous ex about her as I wanted to spare her feelings and avoid any awkwardness. Little white lies and things unsaid are useful tools to help others feel better and everyone to sleep at night. She found out, however, and was livid, wishing me dead.
The new girl and I were doing just fine, until recently when she revealed she still had feelings for someone else, and broke things off. This left me in a new apartment, during the summer with no distracting classes or as many peers nearby, largely alone. While the new ex bears me no ill will and would perhaps agree to be friends, my pride cannot allow that.
Since this I have selfishly felt enormous guilt and regret about pretty much everything. Obviously if the new hadn't come along, I wouldn't have been as keen to leave the old. I know I'm fairly hypocritical in at least a few of these events. I do, objectively, feel absolutely horrible at how the previous relationship ended. I feel like I drowned a puppy. She didn't deserve that.
Attempting to step outside, I realize that people are people. I cannot help feeling a fading spark and loss of attraction/growth of familiarity as much as the new ex couldn't help feeling the same, perhaps, with me. What I did I certainly didn't do out of malice or ill intent.
I think my previous is dating someone, or at the very least meeting regularly with some new friends found online.
And I am left here, spending the summer indoor, remembering what could have been.
I am a non-traditional student who has recently endured two break-ups, one as breaker and the other as breakee. I feel horrible about both of them.
I was in a long-term (more than one year less than five) live-in relationship with someone I met online. When we met I was in a bad place, feeling depressed and directionless. She was presumably lonely as well, though she went on dates she never had a relationship before. We eventually met and I moved to be with her. She helped me find a job, enroll in school. Things started out great, naturally, but as time went on cracks appeared, as they'll appear in at least half of marriages and who knows how many other relationships.
I suppose I felt things getting stagnant. I felt I, and we, weren't growing, spending too much time at home or online. Both being shy, we didn't meet too many new people and spent probably too much time together. I didn't feel the same spark as I once did, and she noticed, causing many serious talks and ending with promises.
I met someone in a class this year and began to correspond with her. As time went on she expressed an interest in me, and I felt one in her as well. Eventually my previous ex sensed my growing distance, and after a discussion we agreed on a "break", wherein I moved out and we would see what would happen. I began to date the younger, newer girl.
I didn't tell my previous ex about her as I wanted to spare her feelings and avoid any awkwardness. Little white lies and things unsaid are useful tools to help others feel better and everyone to sleep at night. She found out, however, and was livid, wishing me dead.
The new girl and I were doing just fine, until recently when she revealed she still had feelings for someone else, and broke things off. This left me in a new apartment, during the summer with no distracting classes or as many peers nearby, largely alone. While the new ex bears me no ill will and would perhaps agree to be friends, my pride cannot allow that.
Since this I have selfishly felt enormous guilt and regret about pretty much everything. Obviously if the new hadn't come along, I wouldn't have been as keen to leave the old. I know I'm fairly hypocritical in at least a few of these events. I do, objectively, feel absolutely horrible at how the previous relationship ended. I feel like I drowned a puppy. She didn't deserve that.
Attempting to step outside, I realize that people are people. I cannot help feeling a fading spark and loss of attraction/growth of familiarity as much as the new ex couldn't help feeling the same, perhaps, with me. What I did I certainly didn't do out of malice or ill intent.
I think my previous is dating someone, or at the very least meeting regularly with some new friends found online.
And I am left here, spending the summer indoor, remembering what could have been.
lol
