I can expose an affair. Should I?

[Jafo]

I have the means and information to expose several affairs. One I was involved in a few years ago and several my former best friend was involved in. has anyone ever exposed an affair? I must admit having the power to destroy someone emotionally is a rush for me.

 

[VanillaCreme]

I think doing it just to hurt someone isn't the best idea, especially if it has nothing to do with you. But if you're doing it because you think it will protect someone you care about from further hurt, then yeah, maybe telling them is a good idea.

But doing it just to be mean and cause more pain is horrible in my eyes. At least do it because you know someone will benefit from knowing the truth.

 

[HoodedMonk]

Note to Self: Never have an affair.

 

[TheSkaFish]

I would do it only if I felt I needed to in order to help someone, or that there was something good that could come of it. Some way of preventing further damage.

Other than that, I don't know. I know it must feel good to think you could really let someone have it, but this is a big thing to consider. Getting back at one's enemies may feel good in the moment, but you may come to regret it later. Not for their sake, but for your own. It would make you something of an anti-villain - a person who combats villains, but who uses more villainy against them, and not for good. It might not sit well with you after the intoxication of power wears off.

 

[HoodedMonk]

I would do it only if I felt I needed to in order to help someone, or that there was something good that could come of it. Some way of preventing further damage.

Other than that, I don't know. I know it must feel good to think you could really let someone have it, but this is a big thing to consider. Getting back at one's enemies may feel good in the moment, but you may come to regret it later. Not for their sake, but for your own. It would make you something of an anti-villain - a person who combats villains, but who uses more villainy against them, and not for good. It might not sit well with you after the intoxication of power wears off.

Plus murders have been known to happen when passion is involved.

Best be careful.

 

[ladyforsaken]

I think doing it just to hurt someone isn't the best idea, especially if it has nothing to do with you. But if you're doing it because you think it will protect someone you care about from further hurt, then yeah, maybe telling them is a good idea.

But doing it just to be mean and cause more pain is horrible in my eyes. At least do it because you know someone will benefit from knowing the truth.

Exactly this.

 

[Jafo]

Well, lets just say these people have it coming to them.

 

[Aisha]

I must admit having the power to destroy someone emotionally is a rush for me.

Your intent counts. Destroying lives just for a power trip isn't a good idea. That will circle back.

 

[Nicolelt]

If someone was having an affair one me, and a friend knew, I would want them to tell me.

But as far just to ruin a relationship or to just cause drama, I wouldn't.

 

[reynard_muldrake]

Three questions:

1.) Do you think, years down the line, you'll be okay with this?

2.) Are you certain your claims will be taken seriously?

3.) What if no one believes you after the exposure of these facts?

I have no intention of telling you what to do/not to do. Just think things over before you act.

 

[Solivagant]

That's a tough question. I've exposed unfaithfulness a few times in the past, and I always struggled over the decision.

In all but one case, the person being cheated on sided with their partner. The cheater would claim that I was jealous of their love, or that I was trying to "steal" them, or that I had come on to them and was trying to get back at them for rejecting me, or some other ridiculous nonsense. Even when I had clear evidence, they claimed I faked it. Hence I became the enemy. No one was helped, and the only one who ended up hurt was me.

Although I would want someone to alert me to an affair, after my experiences, I usually choose not to get involved.

When I did get involved, it was because I cared about the person and didn't want to see them treated that way. I agree with everyone who says you'd be doing it for the wrong reasons.

Edit: I should add that I've also been in the situation where I knew about the cheating and didn't say anything, but ended up blamed anyway when the person being cheated on found out, and found out that I knew.

Three questions:

1.) Do you think, years down the line, you'll be okay with this?

2.) Are you certain your claims will be taken seriously?

3.) What if no one believes you after the exposure of these facts?

I have no intention of telling you what to do/not to do. Just think things over before you act.

^ Agreed.

 

[SofiasMami]

Should you expose an affair? No. One or both of the parties will blame the messenger - you.
Plus, they likely already have suspicions about the cheater or have seen irrefutable evidence of the affair. If you know for sure about the affair, who is to say they don't know about it already as well and just don't want to bother acting on that knowledge?

-Teresa

 

[Jafo]

Three questions:

1.) Do you think, years down the line, you'll be okay with this?

2.) Are you certain your claims will be taken seriously?

3.) What if no one believes you after the exposure of these facts?

I have no intention of telling you what to do/not to do. Just think things over before you act.

1. Yes
2. Yes
3. I have proof in the form of letters and pictures.

 

[constant stranger]

Your motives in doing this are important because your Karma is sure to come boomeranging back at you.
You want to hurt someone because you can? It'll come back to you somehow, sometime.
It's your choice but I'd counsel against it....say nothing about the affair.

 

[VanillaCreme]

Well, lets just say these people have it coming to them.

What makes you think you have the right to determine that?

I must admit having the power to destroy someone emotionally is a rush for me.

Your intent counts. Destroying lives just for a power trip isn't a good idea. That will circle back.

Agree. I think the intent may be good - if it's not done (somehow) for selfish reasons. But doing it just to feel good about your feathers puffing out... I don't know about that. How one has a selfish determination for an affair/relationship that has nothing to do with them kind of confuses me. I have a feeling that you're more involved than you're letting on.

 

[Jafo]

Everyone has it coming to them sooner ot later. I'm not afraid to get mine.

---

Well, lets just say these people have it coming to them.

What makes you think you have the right to determine that?

I must admit having the power to destroy someone emotionally is a rush for me.

Your intent counts. Destroying lives just for a power trip isn't a good idea. That will circle back.

Agree. I think the intent may be good - if it's not done (somehow) for selfish reasons. But doing it just to feel good about your feathers puffing out... I don't know about that. How one has a selfish determination for an affair/relationship that has nothing to do with them kind of confuses me. I have a feeling that you're more involved than you're letting on.

How so? I stated in the beginning that I was involved in an affair sometime ago. That was my own thing. The other affairs were committed by my former best friend. Don't know how much more I can be involved than that.

 

[user 115627]

Everyone has it coming to them sooner or later. I'm not afraid to get mine.

Generally speaking, I'd say spite and self-righteousness are ill advisors in decision-making. As for your motives...looks like you just don't give a fresia anymore and you wanna get back at certain people.

You claim you're not afraid of the backlash. Fair enough, as long as you've considered all the possible consequences for yourself. And as long as that's not just based on your current no-fucks-given attitude.

 

[HoodedMonk]

That's a tough question. I've exposed unfaithfulness a few times in the past, and I always struggled over the decision.

In all but one case, the person being cheated on sided with their partner. The cheater would claim that I was jealous of their love, or that I was trying to "steal" them, or that I had come on to them and was trying to get back at them for rejecting me, or some other ridiculous nonsense. Even when I had clear evidence, they claimed I faked it. Hence I became the enemy. No one was helped, and the only one who ended up hurt was me.

Although I would want someone to alert me to an affair, after my experiences, I usually choose not to get involved.

When I did get involved, it was because I cared about the person and didn't want to see them treated that way. I agree with everyone who says you'd be doing it for the wrong reasons.

Edit: I should add that I've also been in the situation where I knew about the cheating and didn't say anything, but ended up blamed anyway when the person being cheated on found out, and found out that I knew.

Three questions:

1.) Do you think, years down the line, you'll be okay with this?

2.) Are you certain your claims will be taken seriously?

3.) What if no one believes you after the exposure of these facts?

I have no intention of telling you what to do/not to do. Just think things over before you act.

^ Agreed.

People who do wrong have a remarkable way of passing the buck or shirking blame, as in your example.Not surprised at all this is how it went down.

 

[Arachne]

We all have a vindictive side, but that does not mean one should act on it. Put yourself in their shoes. How would you feel? Whats done is done,whether good or bad..And like they say karma is a b*tch. Bright Blessings ^.^

 

[wolvesjr]

You also need to think about the fallout from exposing the affair. Are there any children that would be hurt? What about any spouses of those involved? Would it devastate them or would it make them want to reach out and hurt someone as a result? Did the two involved end things for the right reason or not?

These are things you need to think about before you act.