Case
Well-known member
My ex-wife just texted me a few hours ago to tell me that her husband had died the day before Thanksgiving (here in the States.) I had not communicated with her in five or six years, and suddenly, WHAMMO.
This was, certainly, a horrible thing to happen to her during the holiday season. However, I didn't know she had remarried. When I mentioned this to her, she told me something even more surprising. They were not really married. He had died about two weeks before their planned wedding ceremony. Two weeks! He was buried on the very day they were set to be married.
She said she didn't know why she felt the need to tell me, but she "thought that it was the right thing to do." I'm not sure what she meant by it. Was she hurting so much that she tried contacting the last, closest person to her? I don't know.
I gave her my condolences, and she thanked me.
The thing is, I have this tiny feeling that she deserved this.
Oh, I know that my rational mind would never wish harm upon any person who did not threaten my life or the lives of my loved ones, and this includes my ex-wife. While I have had anger about our past, and I had been hurt by her, I thought I had healed and left that all behind.
Now, I get a few texts from her, and part of me feels like what she has just experienced was a kind of unexplained, karmic retribution, that she is paying right now for the transgressions she brought upon me 10-12 years ago, and she is paying dearly.
These fleeting thoughts make me wonder if I should feel guilty for even feeling slightly satisfied that an equal or greater pain has befallen the very person who inflicted so much pain onto me.
Am I experiencing my first, true moment of schadenfreude? I'm not sure. I feel a bit confused about this, to be honest. My gut tells me that my mind has yet to sort this out. Rarely have I experienced such dual minds about a person to whom I was once very close.
This was, certainly, a horrible thing to happen to her during the holiday season. However, I didn't know she had remarried. When I mentioned this to her, she told me something even more surprising. They were not really married. He had died about two weeks before their planned wedding ceremony. Two weeks! He was buried on the very day they were set to be married.
She said she didn't know why she felt the need to tell me, but she "thought that it was the right thing to do." I'm not sure what she meant by it. Was she hurting so much that she tried contacting the last, closest person to her? I don't know.
I gave her my condolences, and she thanked me.
The thing is, I have this tiny feeling that she deserved this.
Oh, I know that my rational mind would never wish harm upon any person who did not threaten my life or the lives of my loved ones, and this includes my ex-wife. While I have had anger about our past, and I had been hurt by her, I thought I had healed and left that all behind.
Now, I get a few texts from her, and part of me feels like what she has just experienced was a kind of unexplained, karmic retribution, that she is paying right now for the transgressions she brought upon me 10-12 years ago, and she is paying dearly.
These fleeting thoughts make me wonder if I should feel guilty for even feeling slightly satisfied that an equal or greater pain has befallen the very person who inflicted so much pain onto me.
Am I experiencing my first, true moment of schadenfreude? I'm not sure. I feel a bit confused about this, to be honest. My gut tells me that my mind has yet to sort this out. Rarely have I experienced such dual minds about a person to whom I was once very close.