Lonely, yet not alone

[slaan]

I always feel alone, yet I am not alone.

I am not entirely sure how to put this, but I will do my best. Let me paint the picture for you people so you can in turn help me understand.
I study in a university and I am always surrounded by people. I am probably one of the most social people among the 130+ people that form my promotion, yet I always feel alone.
Everyday I say hello to a good dozen of people, everyone knows my face I am pretty sure. I am always smiling and laughing with whomever I find. But I do not think any one actually knows me, or cares about me.
People tell me about their hardships, and tell me how crappy their life is, I do my best to cheer everyone up, but not once did anyone ever ask me how I was doing, and when I try telling people how I feel, they disconnect.

When I was younger it was different, less confusing, I would get beat up regularly and had no friends, things changed at one point, when I moved at age 16 to England, I used my experience in acting to recreate myself in a way, since then I am "popular", yet I still feel so alone.
I am not sure how any one can really help me with this issue, or even if anyone here understands. I just want someone, anyone to know how i feel really.

Thank you for your time, and I am sorry for the long post.

 

[Astral_Punisher]

Hi Slaan,

You sound like a great guy. I'm sure we could have a pint together NO PROB .

My short and sweet advice - get back to your roots. Being someone your not is a form of dishonesty to yourself. Maybe you need some time alone, or perhaps in new, unknown company to re-discovery who you are.

You want to allow your natural self out.
Maybe you are nice inside. Maybe you are a jack-ass. Maybe you really hate goats.

Without letting yourself be out there, and wearing your heart on your sleeve, you will feel dead inside like you do.

I was right where you are a few months back.
Feel free to PM me .