TheWalkingDead
Well-known member
Not sure if this is the right place, but I've tried quite a few Meetups with varying outcomes.
The first one was a gig, and the organiser basically setup the meetup then vanished, leading to several people turning up to the gig and standing on their own which they might as well have done anyway without going to all the bother of arranging a meetup :club:
I've also gone to a meal and a few walks. I struggled with the meal as I was moved from where I wanted to sit and ended up stuck at the end of a table, with a couple of nice people opposite me, the unfortunate thing was they were both Italian and both wanted to practice their English, so I ended up having to field questions about grammar most of the night rather than have any meaningful interaction (and I have noticed there are quite a few people who go to these Meetups to practice their language skills, which is fine, but I've observed they tend to also disappear fairly rapidly and it's not a vehicle for making any kind of lasting connection!)
I've gone on a few walks, and I did manage to talk to some interesting people, although unfortunately have not managed to see most of these again, and there again there were some it was extremely hard to talk to - I break the ice, try to make smalltalk, and it's like I feel I'm speaking Martian. What usually happens is I'm talking to someone and they suddenly drift off and spend most of the rest of the walk with someone else. So I find someone else too, and by the end of the thing I've had about half a dozen superficial conversations and sometimes it's OK, not great, but not "I really regret going to that".
Today I tried something a bit different, it was a talk in a museum, and was really interesting, after the talk I was checking my phone and when I looked up the room had emptied, so I panicked and went out and looked around and couldn't find any sign of the meetup people (there were other non meetup people there too so was bit jumbled). I got distracted by a poster, started to wonder where the rest of the people had gone, and ended up just bailing as there was something I could be sorting out at the same time, but apparently there was a tour after that which I missed out on :club:
I did post to explain what happened but they seemed to take it the wrong way and said everyone was together at the end of the talk - I must have missed that bit when I blinked - I find myself very easily overlooked like that sometimes, it's not for lack of trying to be noticeable
I've also tried my running groups and made a few friends, but I find it incredibily hard and some people shut me down as soon as I try to start talking - and I soon start to feel excluded though it's probably only in my own head. Half the time when I do feel I've made a connection with someone, I never see them again.
I also struggle if there are extravert types, I find they just drain me!
I don't even know what the purpose of this thread is, just to offload the fact that I keep making attempts to be social and it seems to keep not going very well :rolleyes2:
The first one was a gig, and the organiser basically setup the meetup then vanished, leading to several people turning up to the gig and standing on their own which they might as well have done anyway without going to all the bother of arranging a meetup :club:
I've also gone to a meal and a few walks. I struggled with the meal as I was moved from where I wanted to sit and ended up stuck at the end of a table, with a couple of nice people opposite me, the unfortunate thing was they were both Italian and both wanted to practice their English, so I ended up having to field questions about grammar most of the night rather than have any meaningful interaction (and I have noticed there are quite a few people who go to these Meetups to practice their language skills, which is fine, but I've observed they tend to also disappear fairly rapidly and it's not a vehicle for making any kind of lasting connection!)
I've gone on a few walks, and I did manage to talk to some interesting people, although unfortunately have not managed to see most of these again, and there again there were some it was extremely hard to talk to - I break the ice, try to make smalltalk, and it's like I feel I'm speaking Martian. What usually happens is I'm talking to someone and they suddenly drift off and spend most of the rest of the walk with someone else. So I find someone else too, and by the end of the thing I've had about half a dozen superficial conversations and sometimes it's OK, not great, but not "I really regret going to that".
Today I tried something a bit different, it was a talk in a museum, and was really interesting, after the talk I was checking my phone and when I looked up the room had emptied, so I panicked and went out and looked around and couldn't find any sign of the meetup people (there were other non meetup people there too so was bit jumbled). I got distracted by a poster, started to wonder where the rest of the people had gone, and ended up just bailing as there was something I could be sorting out at the same time, but apparently there was a tour after that which I missed out on :club:
I did post to explain what happened but they seemed to take it the wrong way and said everyone was together at the end of the talk - I must have missed that bit when I blinked - I find myself very easily overlooked like that sometimes, it's not for lack of trying to be noticeable
I've also tried my running groups and made a few friends, but I find it incredibily hard and some people shut me down as soon as I try to start talking - and I soon start to feel excluded though it's probably only in my own head. Half the time when I do feel I've made a connection with someone, I never see them again.
I also struggle if there are extravert types, I find they just drain me!
I don't even know what the purpose of this thread is, just to offload the fact that I keep making attempts to be social and it seems to keep not going very well :rolleyes2: