Hey. I am new to this precious board, and no other sub-forum seemed fit for this post, so @mods feel free to move it should I've overlooked something.
Yesterday when I was yet again stalking profiles of people I know on Facebook I realised that my ex-oneitis' new boyfriend is inherently superior to, say, me, which renders questioning her dating choices moot. Let me elaborate: I am 22 years old, I have had a girlfriend (my only one) last year (we split up, initiated by me, due to insufficient compatibility), and I am a grad student in a STEM subject. Being somewhat good at my subject is the only thing that I am good at, and even that requires a shitload of effort. Her boyfriend (whom she met seven months ago and is now moving in with) is a black-belt in Judo, 23 years old (she is 24), both of them are Physics students (although her academic success is virtually non-existent), he is also a professional dancer (participating in international dancing competitions, winning, and such), and he is good-looking, tall, fit, and has a pleasant voice. Lots of chicks dig him, but he appears to like/want my ex-oneitis, which is probably good for her.
Now, I have always felt worthless and inferior to most others, despite a great childhood and wonderful parents/family. I cannot at all complain about my life from a rational perspective, except that I am ... well, visibly average or even largely worthless. I cannot at all compete with a man like my ex-oneitis' boyfriend. There is nothing of visible value about me. I am weak, my voice is annoying, I am average in looks, my mental/cognitive abilities are average, and I am not particularly social, either. Even my days go by faster than for other people, with less productive outcome. Of course, all of this is subjective, but you have to draw the line somewhere when it comes to mindless pop-positivity. Being positive is good, if it is based on reason, but otherwise it is simply delusional.
A vast bulk of my knowledge is in my subject of study. Others, who are also equally good at my subject, also know a lot about other topics, like history, philosophy, other STEM subjects, and so on. This is knowledge I could never absorb simply out of a sheer lack of time. I need most of my resources for my own subject.
Yeah, I am somewhat good at languages, but except for English and my native languages I have no way of making proper use of that "ability". Learning a language's vocabulary still takes a lot of time, even if grammar comes somewhat naturally to me.
And physical activity: I have an average body. It could look better, were I to put more effort into my workout but I must admit that I am too lazy for that, because it's painful and I don't find pain of that kind particularly enjoyable.
So, how do you properly distinguish between imagined and true lack of worth when it comes to your own self?
When I compare myself to others, I almost always feel inferior.
Yesterday when I was yet again stalking profiles of people I know on Facebook I realised that my ex-oneitis' new boyfriend is inherently superior to, say, me, which renders questioning her dating choices moot. Let me elaborate: I am 22 years old, I have had a girlfriend (my only one) last year (we split up, initiated by me, due to insufficient compatibility), and I am a grad student in a STEM subject. Being somewhat good at my subject is the only thing that I am good at, and even that requires a shitload of effort. Her boyfriend (whom she met seven months ago and is now moving in with) is a black-belt in Judo, 23 years old (she is 24), both of them are Physics students (although her academic success is virtually non-existent), he is also a professional dancer (participating in international dancing competitions, winning, and such), and he is good-looking, tall, fit, and has a pleasant voice. Lots of chicks dig him, but he appears to like/want my ex-oneitis, which is probably good for her.
Now, I have always felt worthless and inferior to most others, despite a great childhood and wonderful parents/family. I cannot at all complain about my life from a rational perspective, except that I am ... well, visibly average or even largely worthless. I cannot at all compete with a man like my ex-oneitis' boyfriend. There is nothing of visible value about me. I am weak, my voice is annoying, I am average in looks, my mental/cognitive abilities are average, and I am not particularly social, either. Even my days go by faster than for other people, with less productive outcome. Of course, all of this is subjective, but you have to draw the line somewhere when it comes to mindless pop-positivity. Being positive is good, if it is based on reason, but otherwise it is simply delusional.
A vast bulk of my knowledge is in my subject of study. Others, who are also equally good at my subject, also know a lot about other topics, like history, philosophy, other STEM subjects, and so on. This is knowledge I could never absorb simply out of a sheer lack of time. I need most of my resources for my own subject.
Yeah, I am somewhat good at languages, but except for English and my native languages I have no way of making proper use of that "ability". Learning a language's vocabulary still takes a lot of time, even if grammar comes somewhat naturally to me.
And physical activity: I have an average body. It could look better, were I to put more effort into my workout but I must admit that I am too lazy for that, because it's painful and I don't find pain of that kind particularly enjoyable.
So, how do you properly distinguish between imagined and true lack of worth when it comes to your own self?
When I compare myself to others, I almost always feel inferior.