stork_error
Well-known member
- Joined
- Aug 31, 2014
- Messages
- 350
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Victims vs victim mentality
Unless you really know what someone has experienced, how can anyone determine what they need. Its so easy for others to label anyone who is behaving helplessly as having victim mentality, but sometimes people really are the victims and have every good reason to feel helpless
And sometimes, people really are trapped, by finances or health problems etc..
No wife deserves to be beaten because the husband suffers from paranoia, no man deserves to be beaten up on the street for being gay, no person deserves to be bullied at work because they are good at their job, no child needs to be picked on because they are socially challenged.
Some people might need a kick in the ass but some people need a big fat hug. Some people need many many hugs. I don't prepose to know what anyone needs and at the risk of misjudging someone and kicking someone who actually needs a hug, I think for me, its best not to kick anyone period, unless I KNOW as a fact that they need a kick and that they can handle a kick, and I'm not qualified to have that answer, I'm not a DR.
I dont want to be the person who tips someone over the edge and causes them to kill themselves. Sometimes a simple lack of empathy is all a suicidal person needs to take their own life.
I would never want to be the cause of that because i kicked them.
Loneliness is a risk factor for suicide, I don't think that should be taken lightly.
There are many different types of lonely people. There are people who suffer physical disabilities, there are people who suffer from social disabilities like Aspergers or extreme shyness or insecurity, there are people who are lonely because they are nassholes or their are people who have been abused, bullied or beaten up by life and are left cynical. These people are as different as the snowflakes that fall from the sky and what they need is vastly different from one another.
I think kicking someone who cant handle it is extremely dangerous as it can easily trigger suicide in someone who is in contemplation.
I don't think anyone can judge what a person needs unless they are a family member, very close friend or a dr who has been by their side over a long period of time.
I suppose its easier to kick people in the ass maybe if you have never been the person who really needs the hug, and i suppose its impossible to understand being trapped by circumstance unless you have been trapped by circumstance.
Unless you really know what someone has experienced, how can anyone determine what they need. Its so easy for others to label anyone who is behaving helplessly as having victim mentality, but sometimes people really are the victims and have every good reason to feel helpless
And sometimes, people really are trapped, by finances or health problems etc..
No wife deserves to be beaten because the husband suffers from paranoia, no man deserves to be beaten up on the street for being gay, no person deserves to be bullied at work because they are good at their job, no child needs to be picked on because they are socially challenged.
Some people might need a kick in the ass but some people need a big fat hug. Some people need many many hugs. I don't prepose to know what anyone needs and at the risk of misjudging someone and kicking someone who actually needs a hug, I think for me, its best not to kick anyone period, unless I KNOW as a fact that they need a kick and that they can handle a kick, and I'm not qualified to have that answer, I'm not a DR.
I dont want to be the person who tips someone over the edge and causes them to kill themselves. Sometimes a simple lack of empathy is all a suicidal person needs to take their own life.
I would never want to be the cause of that because i kicked them.
Loneliness is a risk factor for suicide, I don't think that should be taken lightly.
There are many different types of lonely people. There are people who suffer physical disabilities, there are people who suffer from social disabilities like Aspergers or extreme shyness or insecurity, there are people who are lonely because they are nassholes or their are people who have been abused, bullied or beaten up by life and are left cynical. These people are as different as the snowflakes that fall from the sky and what they need is vastly different from one another.
I think kicking someone who cant handle it is extremely dangerous as it can easily trigger suicide in someone who is in contemplation.
I don't think anyone can judge what a person needs unless they are a family member, very close friend or a dr who has been by their side over a long period of time.
I suppose its easier to kick people in the ass maybe if you have never been the person who really needs the hug, and i suppose its impossible to understand being trapped by circumstance unless you have been trapped by circumstance.