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my situation
#1
so basically this is the somewhat abridged story of what i'm dealing with right now. i do need someone to talk to, and i'm tired of talking to my parents about all this. my complaints basically haven't changed the last 5.5 years, and i've stopped benefiting really from their advice. i'll try and not get too scattered with erroneous details, mind you. so this started with a car accident my freshman year of college. no foul play was involved, but i was driving and had a passenger/friend that was more affected than i. so i have that on my conscience (i don't really take responsibility for that...i was an irresponsible driver and didn't pay the attention i should have to icy road conditions, but i was young and inexperienced with that...shit happens), though i'm not looking for any consolation regarding that. i've gone thru therapy and stuff for that. so this accident has changed the way i act sometimes, not to mention my ability to speak clearly or play sports. these factors have made getting a job tough too. i'm so weird sometimes. it can be well received, but it is not something people like to deal with on a more permanent basis. i'm 24 years old now and am back in grad school basically because i am not confident in my ability to perform/i don't have the ability to perform/i didn't find work when i got my bachelor's in dec 2008. (when i talk about my inability to perform in a work environment, i'm being serious. my attention easily diverts, i am a slow writer, and i get so awkward in most social situations.)
for work this summer i was a counselor at a (wholesome...too wholesome) summer camp. camp is usually a place where relationships formed are strong and can be very special and lasting. i'm not claiming to have made no friends, but my last couple days there i was distant and didn't end things right with almost everyone. and while i was there, i didn't get along well with most, though i had some 'me' fans. right now though (i'm lonely/need a friend), i have no one to talk with. not only from camp, but from anywhere really. i could call a couple of kids from high school, but it would be an awkward situation with almost anyone, them included. and this is what i'm really worried about now. i don't interact well with anyone. girls sometimes, but not always. i was told this summer that 'no one really cares for your soul here' (context: i was kind of with this girl, but i deviated from that pretty blatantly one night and she was hurt. it was her way of getting back at me, but that doesn't change what she said/that she had those thoughts.)
basically though i feel like i have so much good to share with others, hypothetically speaking. i say that because when it comes down to it, i kind of revel in being an ass. i have come to enjoy being a lone wolf (NOT a loner! I hate this language, a kid this summer was trying to advise/consol me and in the process let it slip that people think i'm a loner. i had never come across this language before, and i was hot. so i called my mom and she said 'yeah, i can see how people would say that'), but then i come to the point where i realize that i have no one. maybe i'll call somebody i knew a long time ago, but then it'll come to the point where i can't communicate what i'm feeling thanks to my damn brain injury. and if i do get through what i want, it takes a while.
so basically this is where i'm at right now. it does help to write about it, but maybe that's the beer talking. see, i claim to be such a good person, but really there are some pretty serious issues i constantly deal with. i smoke cigs alone, i drink beer alone, i watch porn ALONE if i'm not getting any (which is a lot of the time, i've had sex with 8 girls in like 6 years.) this is all in moderation though, i start to feel like a bad person and i really do try to curb all of these habits down to manageable levels.
alright well if you can make sense of my ramblings, i'd appreciate any words you might have. thanks.
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#2
So I'm guessing all your problems stemmed from the car accident you had when you were younger. Well on a positive note there's only more room to improve right. I say you should be around people more. If it's the brain injury that caused you to act the way you are, I'm pretty sure interacting with people will somehow provide some kind of training or reinforcement for your social skills. There are people in this world who would be willing to listen and understand your situation. When you become aware of your problem, you can decide to fix it. If you're not content with what you are now and want to change it will take much effort. Coming to this forum will probably serve as a new beginning for you. Glad you joined us.

On a side note, something you said, don't people naturally watch porn alone? xD
Taengoo~♥
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#3
(08-25-2010, 02:57 PM)Yukhi Wrote: So I'm guessing all your problems stemmed from the car accident you had when you were younger. Well on a positive note there's only more room to improve right. I say you should be around people more. If it's the brain injury that caused you to act the way you are, I'm pretty sure interacting with people will somehow provide some kind of training or reinforcement for your social skills. There are people in this world who would be willing to listen and understand your situation. When you become aware of your problem, you can decide to fix it. If you're not content with what you are now and want to change it will take much effort. Coming to this forum will probably serve as a new beginning for you. Glad you joined us.

On a side note, something you said, don't people naturally watch porn alone? xD
yukhi, thanks for your post. i don't know if i'd say that all my problems stemmed from the accident, it can be a bit of a gray area. some do come from it, most even, but my core personality definitely hasn't changed. if anything, i've grown from it. but i do have a hard time dealing with life in general sometimes. sometimes i'm great, but when i go down it's really easy for me to over analyze situations and blame them on my accident. not to say it isn't a big deal, but it is within my power to rise above. as to your suggestion that when i become aware of my problem...i mean i am aware. i just freeze when i try to do anything about it. and i'm lost about what to do basically. any suggestions?
'imchubbs7'
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#4
Hi,The responsibilities of being a father are demanding and never easy. This section explores some of the issues associated with being a new parent, raising children into adulthood, and ways to stay connected with your kids no matter where life takes you as well as providing resources on challenges you may face along the way.

As you and your child go through different milestones together there are a lot of changes and challenges that will come up. From the anticipation of a new dad-to-be to handling potty training to how much time your teenager spends online, each age and stage presents challenges along with great moments.
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#5
does no one else have anything to say here? I really would appreciate any response you might have.
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#6
(08-26-2010, 07:59 PM)Btqws Wrote: Hi,The responsibilities of being a father are demanding and never easy. This section explores some of the issues associated with being a new parent, raising children into adulthood, and ways to stay connected with your kids no matter where life takes you as well as providing resources on challenges you may face along the way.

As you and your child go through different milestones together there are a lot of changes and challenges that will come up. From the anticipation of a new dad-to-be to handling potty training to how much time your teenager spends online, each age and stage presents challenges along with great moments.

what the fuck you talking about?
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#7
^^^ dont worry about that guy, he was just here trying to sell something. SPAM.

Im sorry youve had bad experiences, and it seems like youve had a lot of them. A car accident or any kind of physical problems can seriously effect your emotional and mental health. All I can say is to try to not think about what people have said to you in the past. Almost impossible, right, I am the same way. But think of it this way, you are thinking about things that they have probably forgotten about. Maybe calling someone who you used to know isnt the solution, it just takes you back to the past that you dont want to remember. Sometimes its best to just start new with new people. Coming here can be a first step in being comfortable talking to someone new, and you could make good friends. Sorry I didnt reply until this late, and I hope you still want to talk about this and with me. Good Luck.
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#8
I just love how everything was all serious and then I scroll down the page to read Btwqs' post xD

@imchubbs7

Sorry for replying a bit late. 4-5 days late rather Sad Oomph!

Anyways, if you're still reading the most common way to deal with these problems is to get a therapist. Hopefully you do have the money but if you don't want to, you can talk to people who you know you can confide your situation to. Maybe people like... US xD Or maybe to people in real life who'll understand you.
Taengoo~♥
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