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Has anyone ever had bullies at work?
#1
I bumped into 2 former colleagues and 1 of them was a popular, extroverted female that indirectly bullied me at work. When I worked with her, I overheard her badmouthing me to others, telling them that I'm weird, that I should be doing more etc. That's a real hoot because I worked more hours than anyone else and my manager constantly praised me for my work as well as my other colleagues. Any events that occured post-work were arranged by her and I was always purposely excluded. 

When I left my old workplace, I felt that I left on a positive note. Although I didn't have "friends" from work, people respected me for my strong work ethic, knowledge and they praised me for my contributions.

Fast-forward several years, I bumped into this person at my new workplace...found out we work in the same building. She was very chilly, had negative body language, looked angry while I tried to be friendly and smiled at her. She was with another colleague that I used to talk to all of the time and that colleague was just as equally chilly and pretended not to see me at first.

I found out from small talk that they work at the unit that I hope to get a job at one day. 

I can't help but feel nervous for the future if I want to advance and pursue that job that I would be ostracized again like I was at my old workplace. She has friends and family in management and is popular. When I worked with her, I overheard her a lot (she talks loudly) and it was always badmouthing her friends or people. She's also the type of person to pursue "vengeance" and is quite catty from the conversations that I've overheard. All she ever talks about is people, and everyone is so interested to listen! I can't help but feel that she must have been talking lots about me since I left the job and for my once-friendly colleague to blatantly ignore me all of a sudden.

I really hope I don't run into any more former colleagues because they don't truly know me, but it seems that she's friends with many of them. I notice in female friendships, if 1 person doesn't like another...they will spread rumours, gossip, lies about that other person and try to get everyone to turn against them. Those "followers" often lack an independent mind of their own to think..."Why don't I ask this other person if she truly said that?" "Why don't I get to know that other person?" "Is this information true?" etc. Then they just end up hating and being mean to someone that they don't even know. I speak from personal experience as a SURVIVOR of countless years of bullying.

I'm just not sure what to think. I really want the job, but I feel nervous about potentially walking in and strangers hating me from the first impression or having to relive being ostracized and badmouthed. Another thing is that it's much higher position than the one that I have and I feel that it's unfair that mean people are rewarded and surrounded by friends. I am a good person but I can't seem to find anyone that reaches back when I reach out...
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#2
Being bullied at work is the worst, I had two bosses who liked to bully their employees, and one would say nasty things about the others behind their back to the other employees. He was a real grade A sack of crap.
_______________________________________________________________________
Sickos never scare me. Least they're committed.  
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#3
I am employed by one. I've actually walked out of my job twice, as a result of it. For some reason, the last time I went back, I just started finding humor in the stupid shit she was saying. Unfortunately, she can't keep many other staff members.
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#4
Sci, since you're writing in past tense...that's good news that you don't work for them anymore!

Amy, are you staying in your job because there are no other options? I had a nasty boss that'd cuss at people whenever she was unhappy with her personal life...took me about 1 year to find another job and when I did find another one - boy, I ran like hell! haha
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#5
I've been offered other jobs. The thing is I make a good amount in wages at this one, and to be honest...I find her crap kind of funny. Once you realize that she's full of it. And secretly, I'm hoping to be employed long enough to see someone knock her on her behind.
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#6
At a call centre job I was working in about two years ago, there was one woman who was totally two faced. Let's call her "A." She could be friendly with someone for months and then decide to turn on them. She'd be openly rude to you, email about you and talk about you behind your back. Then, after months of being cold, she'd randomly give you some fudge she'd made or something. I also noticed that she didn't seem to have any reservations whatsoever about dealing with angry phone calls from the public, like it didn't phase her like it would most people (this was a relatively high stress environment). Almost like she just didn't have the general sense of fear or reservation that most people do. She came from a wealthy family but I think one of her brothers killed himself and the other one was a drug addict or something.

Around the time A turned on me, there was another lady in our team who I was friends with. I thought that the two of them were friends as well but it turned out that A hated her and sent her all these horrible emails and may have played a role in splitting her up with her partner who was also in the team and also had a falling out with A not long after I left that job. A was also an expert at sucking up to our team leader (who wasn't the nicest lady on the planet herself) who I suspect was actually pretty unaware that one person was managing to poison a team environment significantly.

I'm pretty convinced that there was something wrong with A, she wasn't normal that's for sure.
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#7
I have a coworker that talks shit about everyone , EVERYONE
He is also a chuckle head so he is nice to your face and laughs like Fire Marshal Bob from SNL
Pretty much everyone thinks he is an idiot
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#8
She sounds hot, in my experience only hot people can talk crap about everyone and everyting and still get ahead in the workplace of those putting in the real work, once they get older and looks start to fade they are inevitably struck by reality, or more like getting run over by it asif it were a freight train, it's probably little comfort though.
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#9
I was bullied for 10 years. We both work in the same place but I no longer work for him. I go to lunch every day at 11 AM to miss him in the cafeteria and I asked my bosses to "divorce" me from any association with him. They did. My work is suburb. Now he can't get to me so he helps a colleague bully a friend of mine.

My advice -- the only way to live is to avoid bullies. If they get any access to you they will bully you. If you can leave, do it. If you can minimize involvement with them, do it. I gave this advice to my bullied friend and she didn't listen. She is paying the price.

There are movements to get laws signed to make workplace bulling illegal. On the one hand, seems like it could be helpful mostly because now a lot of law suits are filed under other theories but the behavior is really bullying. But for the moment it is perfectly legal.
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#10
I've witnessed bullying at work, oh yes, but I was never the victim....nor was I the bully, I was one of the rest of the team who saw it and didn't do anything about it. I'm sorry about that.
Be here now.
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