20 YR OLD Never had a girlfriend, Need some help + Tips.

[Rambo_Muscle]

Hello all.

This is quite personal for me, though I believe that others can help me, and people that are similar to me and in the same situation, please leave a message.

Yes, I am 20 and I have never had a girlfriend, and I have never had sex. before you start questioning, there is nothing wrong with me.

I am 6 FT tall.
150 LBS.
Handsome, (I have been told I am, and I am, not being arrogant, but I like being in style, keeping my hair styled, coloured, etc.
I Go to the gym, Martial arts, Very fit, lean muscle with under 10% bodyfat.
Very outgoing out, confident (Quite shy around girls, depends which hah)
Like going out with friends to clubs, etc.


I believe I am not like most guys, why? look below.

I do not drink, (EVER, never even had a glass of beer before)
I do not smoke (EVER, never tried, not going to)
I do not take drugs (EVER, never tried, never going to)
I do not use girls for sex, and I wouldn't, I am looking for a relationship and to love that special girl, not for a one night stand.
I want to care for that special girl, take her out, make her enjoy herself, look after her, make her feel special!.
I want to be loved and I want to love that special girl.

I am a big believer in Fitness, Nutrition, Martial Arts, and Philosophy.

I am not ugly, I am handsome, I have been told by many. I have had a few opportunities with girls liking me and wanting me, though I did not really have the connection with them, and I wouldn't use them for my pleasure. I am not arrogant, I am not mean, I am not nasty, I am not a user, I am probably too respectable and nice.

Well anyways, I like this girl at the local supermarket, I have talked to her a few times but not recently, Months ago we talked and she told me that she does hairdressing, and I talked about what I like, Gym etc, and that I study. We talked a little, and I feel a bit of a connection and a lot of attraction towards her.


I was going to talk to her next time, though if she is not at the counter, I may wave and say hello, if she is! then thats where I will start off something like this.

"Hey, how are you, haven't talked to you for a while"

(I am not after reading a script, but thats what has been in my head to talk to her about, of course it is important to be yourself but I do not want to stuff it up haha.

I'll follow up with the below sentence.

"Hows work, (And that leads into a conversation about me trying to get a job here) then I can ask her how her hairdressing is going, etc.

Then I may ask her, how do you pronounce your name (Because I haven't really had her ask my name, or anything, Her name is quite unique)

Then I could be something like, Wow, thats a unique name, I haven't heard of that one before (ITS TRUE) and I may say something like, My name is quite unique too, hoping she asks what it is.

I want to get to know her and talk to her 3-4 times before asking her out for dinner or somewhere.

Please help me with any tips, conversations, etc, and past experiences.

Thank you.

 

[Lonesome Crow]

yeah...kind da like matial aRT.
You aint ganna be a black belt over night.
Practice and exposure pretty much.....You get better as you go.

Eventully you gatta over come your fears and make contact.
As long as you practice, continue to have exposure...there's really
not a rigth way or a wrong way to go about how to pick up women.
You seem to hAve confidence in yourself..so let that sign through.

You have your own style..as I have mind.

Im kindda passive agressive. That how I meet some women.
Just chit chatting...then they pretty much let me know whats up.

 

[Rambo_Muscle]

yeah...kind da like matial aRT.
You aint ganna be a black belt over night.
Practice and exposure pretty much.....You get better as you go.

Eventully you gatta over come your fears and make contact.
As long as you practice, continue to have exposure...there's really
not a rigth way or a wrong way to go about how to pick up women.
You seem to hAve confidence in yourself..so let that sign through.

You have your own style..as I have mind.

Im kindda passive agressive. That how I meet some women.
Just chit chatting...then they pretty much let me know whats up.

Oh okay, thank you, Yeah, practice makes perfect with anything.

So, would you say the conversation example I would have with her would be interesting and okay? was thinking of throwing a sincere compliment about her hair, because it does look nice

More replys are welcome.

 

[Lonesome Crow]

Oh yeah....compliment her. thats akways s good thing.

zthe more relex you are...the easier its gonna be.
Just like msrtial arts...

Stay focus and in the moment with her.
Be light hearted and have fun.
Luagh with her...
if she say a joke.

 

[passage]

Just my opinion here, but maybe all of your qualities make you boring to some women, specifically the ones in your age range. Given that you are handsome, maybe a lot of women only want sex out of you.

As for the girl at the supermarket, just be honest. Next time tell her xyz (I find you cute/interesting/cool/whatever), I'd like to get to know you better, and ask her she would like to meet for coffee, or a walk...etc. If she is even slightly attracted to you, she'll most likely respond with a yes, and be all giddy about it the rest of the day.

 

[Sterling]

Yes, I am 20 and I have never had a girlfriend, and I have never had sex.

Why start out with this comment? How does it pertain to the girl you're trying to pursue? You can be a 20 year old virgin, who's never had a girlfriend and still do fine in this aspect. It's really not seen or heard of, but there are A LOT of people in your situation of virginity and whatnot.

Anyways, the longer you wait...the longer there is a chance that someone else will ask her out. She's a hairdresser, she's PLENTY of people daily. One of her clients could be her next boyfriend. So, next time you see her...ask her , a[/quote]nd on your date...don't let the first conversation be about this ---> "Yes, I am 20 and I have never had a girlfriend, and I have never had sex."

 

[ajdass1]

As for the girl at the supermarket, just be honest. Next time tell her xyz (I find you cute/interesting/cool/whatever), I'd like to get to know you better, and ask her she would like to meet for coffee, or a walk...etc. If she is even slightly attracted to you, she'll most likely respond with a yes, and be all giddy about it the rest of the day.

Along this train of thought, if you want her to know your name, there's nothing wrong with just telling her. "By the way, I'm [so-and-so]." It comes off as way more confident than this labyrinthine thought process where you hope she asks you your name because you've been talking about hers.

Definitely don't wait 3-4 times to ask her out. She'll know you like her, just like I can usually tell if a girl likes me when I'm talking to her. There isn't some arbitrary amount of conversation you need to have before asking someone out.

Compliments are good but a specific compliment is better. For example, her hair - what exactly is it you like about it?

Dinner is too formal for a first date, like Passage says, go for a coffee or a walk. That way you'll both be more relaxed and have more fun.

Just some thoughts. Good luck!

 

[Rambo_Muscle]

So, next time you see her...ask her , a[/quote]nd on your date...don't let the first conversation be about this ---> "Yes, I am 20 and I have never had a girlfriend, and I have never had sex."
[/quote]


Hahahaaa, thats funny as, of course I wont say that! Sry, I just wanted to put it out there so others knew that I haven't had the experience with those yet..

---

As for the girl at the supermarket, just be honest. Next time tell her xyz (I find you cute/interesting/cool/whatever), I'd like to get to know you better, and ask her she would like to meet for coffee, or a walk...etc. If she is even slightly attracted to you, she'll most likely respond with a yes, and be all giddy about it the rest of the day.

Along this train of thought, if you want her to know your name, there's nothing wrong with just telling her. "By the way, I'm [so-and-so]." It comes off as way more confident than this labyrinthine thought process where you hope she asks you your name because you've been talking about hers.

Definitely don't wait 3-4 times to ask her out. She'll know you like her, just like I can usually tell if a girl likes me when I'm talking to her. There isn't some arbitrary amount of conversation you need to have before asking someone out.

Compliments are good but a specific compliment is better. For example, her hair - what exactly is it you like about it?

Dinner is too formal for a first date, like Passage says, go for a coffee or a walk. That way you'll both be more relaxed and have more fun.

Just some thoughts. Good luck!

Totally understand,thank you.
What are some good compliments I can use? I did mention her hair, yeah it looks nice, she has like some blonde at the back, (a little bit) and it looks good, though its a little bit so it might not be enough to compliment on..
I actually saw her today but it was in the most awkward situation, She was lining up in the queue to buy something, She was behind this lady, and I was first, so I couldn't really have talked to her. I looked at her and she looked at me but I didn't really do anything. I Was kicking myself a bit, because if I was 30 seconds later to the shops, I would of seen her shopping around like I was! dammit, haha, yeah I'll talk to her next time, and probably ask her out for coffee on her day off or something, it seems more fun and has less commitment then DINNER.

I really wish I saw her shopping around, that way it would of been quiet and she would be able to talk freely, instead of being at the counter. Then again I wouldn't of asked her out because I read these helpful tips afterwards, haha.

Thanks.

---

Just my opinion here, but maybe all of your qualities make you boring to some women, specifically the ones in your age range. Given that you are handsome, maybe a lot of women only want sex out of you.

As for the girl at the supermarket, just be honest. Next time tell her xyz (I find you cute/interesting/cool/whatever), I'd like to get to know you better, and ask her she would like to meet for coffee, or a walk...etc. If she is even slightly attracted to you, she'll most likely respond with a yes, and be all giddy about it the rest of the day.

I don't think I'm a boring person and my friends don't think I am either.. though to girls I may be, you could be right.. I am naturally outgoing, funny, laughing, having a good time, confident, jokes, talking, etc, but with girls its a whole lot different.. So, maybe you could give me some tips to be more interesting to girls?

 

[TheSolitaryMan]

I'm not sure what you're worried about to be honest, OP

I've been working out for some time, and less than 10% body fat is my ultimate goal which I'm still striving for.

If you've already hit that goal your abs and muscles probably look awesome! If you're also handsome and you believe in treating girls right, all you need to do is go out there and talk to them more ^^

I advise just becoming friends with a girl and gradually escalating physical contact a little bit if you see her as a potential girlfriend. If she likes you back she'll show that she does (perhaps even asking you out somewhere) and then you're all set

 

[ajdass1]

Compliments - The fact that you like her highlights is great. That should be enough. Personally I hate it when girls totally bleach their hair because I think natural hair tones are just beautiful on their own. Especially in brown hair, you know, it has a lot of subtlety and tone that just gets blasted out by bleach. So that's what I would say if I wanted to go more, but just the comment about the highlights is enough.

When you saw her it's fine to wave hello and smile. In fact after you got out of the queue you could even hang around and pretend to check your phone until she gets out of the queue, and then say hello (you won't be fooling anyone, but it's more socially acceptable than just staring at her and drooling until she gets done, lol)