Jocsaint
Well-known member
Hello, all! This is my first post here and I hope I don't offend anybody during my stay here or anything. Anyway, my problem is a previous relationship. This is sort of a long read, I apologize. It's the only way I can properly convey my problem.
During the last three years of high school, my dad enrolled me into an online school because of a bomb threat at the brick and mortar school I was going to. It was nice, but I kind of needed some social interaction. At around the time I got pulled from the brick and mortar school, I began to "come out of my shell" as the saying goes. I was always the quiet, loner type, but I was starting to get a few friends before I left.
Anyway, the online school had a sort of chat program, similar to AIM, where you could chat with the other students who were taking the same classes as you. I started talking to this girl, her name was Angela. At first it was sort of awkward, but soon we were talking to each other all day. I was even talking to her on the phone for hours, something I've never done with anyone before really.
We never actually seen each other face to face, but we talked to each other for hours about stuff that was going on in our lives, and just about anything else. One day she told me loved me, and I thought I loved her too. I was crazy about her. She was all I thought about. I know, it's a bit odd that we never seen each other, but we already knew everything about each other. Or at least I thought I did.
See, she would tell me these stories about herself and how she was put into an online school because, well, I'll be blunt, because she was the school slut. She was telling me about all of her sexual escapades, giving handjobs in the middle of class, having a three way with her best friend and her boyfriend... Yuck. One day, she told me a story so sickening that I actually argued with her. I hung up and we didn't talk for like a month.
Than I began to think. Was she really the school slut she had painted herself to be? Was she testing me? Was she just telling me all of this sick stuff so that I wouldn't talk to her anymore? Look, I ain't the best looking guy in the world. Certainly not the fittest either, I've had a sort of weight issue since I was a kid, but I would like to consider myself at least somewhat attractive. I would say I'm a pretty nice guy too, I can hold a good conversation.
When we stopped talking, at first it was great. I didn't have to talk to her or message her anymore or even bother to think about her. But I started to miss her. One day I started talking to her again, and it turned out she had already moved on to another guy, they even had pictures with each other. They were actually seeing each other, and I just felt... Wronged. I has asked multiple times if we could meet up somewhere and hangout, but she would always have some sort of excuse.
So then I got to thinking, well, she started telling me those stories just so she could move onto this guy. Or maybe she was already with him and needed to get rid of me? We still talked, and I tried convincing her to leave him for me. He was one of those crazy, bible thumping idiots and I just didn't understand their attraction to each other because they were polar opposites. She was telling me that he wanted her to change, and I never wanted her to do that. I was perfectly happy with her being who she was.
I don't know, I just thought that they weren't right together and that we were. One day, I thought I had gotten through to her. He had stood her up somewhere, and she texted me. She was like, I want to be with you we're going to hang out soon and such and such. The next day though, it was a completely different story. She blocked me on the messenger and when I called her she told me she had made a mistake.
Yeah, the whole situation was pretty odd for an online school, I know. You don't know how many times I've attempted to seek help about this before, but all I could imagine is people laughing because of an online relationship. People saying just get over it because it wasn't real. It was real to me though. Anyway, after that day we never talked again. But that was over four years ago... Lot's have things have changed, but I still can't get Angela out of my mind. I remember how I used to call her Angel because of her physical and mental beauty. She had an old spirit, and that was attractive to me.
I just can't stop thinking about her. I often wonder where we would be today if things had gone down differently, if I just stuck with her. I try looking her up on Facebook and Twitter and stuff to see how she is, but I can't find her anywhere and I don't want to reach stalker level extremes. I just want to talk to her, maybe get some closure or just be friends with her. I figured anything that she said would make me feel better about the thing.
I don't know where she lives, what she does, how she is or even if she'd remember me if we seen each other by some freak occurrence. All that I know is that I can't seem to forget what we had. Our friendship, our young love. I miss hearing her voice. Talking to her about my day, listening to her about her day. I feel halfway crazy when I even start to think about it all. If anybody has any comments about the story, or any advice on how to get over this girl, I'm all ears. Or eyes.
I haven't really had a relationship since her, but that's due to personal issues as well. Thanks, and sorry for this giant block of text.
During the last three years of high school, my dad enrolled me into an online school because of a bomb threat at the brick and mortar school I was going to. It was nice, but I kind of needed some social interaction. At around the time I got pulled from the brick and mortar school, I began to "come out of my shell" as the saying goes. I was always the quiet, loner type, but I was starting to get a few friends before I left.
Anyway, the online school had a sort of chat program, similar to AIM, where you could chat with the other students who were taking the same classes as you. I started talking to this girl, her name was Angela. At first it was sort of awkward, but soon we were talking to each other all day. I was even talking to her on the phone for hours, something I've never done with anyone before really.
We never actually seen each other face to face, but we talked to each other for hours about stuff that was going on in our lives, and just about anything else. One day she told me loved me, and I thought I loved her too. I was crazy about her. She was all I thought about. I know, it's a bit odd that we never seen each other, but we already knew everything about each other. Or at least I thought I did.
See, she would tell me these stories about herself and how she was put into an online school because, well, I'll be blunt, because she was the school slut. She was telling me about all of her sexual escapades, giving handjobs in the middle of class, having a three way with her best friend and her boyfriend... Yuck. One day, she told me a story so sickening that I actually argued with her. I hung up and we didn't talk for like a month.
Than I began to think. Was she really the school slut she had painted herself to be? Was she testing me? Was she just telling me all of this sick stuff so that I wouldn't talk to her anymore? Look, I ain't the best looking guy in the world. Certainly not the fittest either, I've had a sort of weight issue since I was a kid, but I would like to consider myself at least somewhat attractive. I would say I'm a pretty nice guy too, I can hold a good conversation.
When we stopped talking, at first it was great. I didn't have to talk to her or message her anymore or even bother to think about her. But I started to miss her. One day I started talking to her again, and it turned out she had already moved on to another guy, they even had pictures with each other. They were actually seeing each other, and I just felt... Wronged. I has asked multiple times if we could meet up somewhere and hangout, but she would always have some sort of excuse.
So then I got to thinking, well, she started telling me those stories just so she could move onto this guy. Or maybe she was already with him and needed to get rid of me? We still talked, and I tried convincing her to leave him for me. He was one of those crazy, bible thumping idiots and I just didn't understand their attraction to each other because they were polar opposites. She was telling me that he wanted her to change, and I never wanted her to do that. I was perfectly happy with her being who she was.
I don't know, I just thought that they weren't right together and that we were. One day, I thought I had gotten through to her. He had stood her up somewhere, and she texted me. She was like, I want to be with you we're going to hang out soon and such and such. The next day though, it was a completely different story. She blocked me on the messenger and when I called her she told me she had made a mistake.
Yeah, the whole situation was pretty odd for an online school, I know. You don't know how many times I've attempted to seek help about this before, but all I could imagine is people laughing because of an online relationship. People saying just get over it because it wasn't real. It was real to me though. Anyway, after that day we never talked again. But that was over four years ago... Lot's have things have changed, but I still can't get Angela out of my mind. I remember how I used to call her Angel because of her physical and mental beauty. She had an old spirit, and that was attractive to me.
I just can't stop thinking about her. I often wonder where we would be today if things had gone down differently, if I just stuck with her. I try looking her up on Facebook and Twitter and stuff to see how she is, but I can't find her anywhere and I don't want to reach stalker level extremes. I just want to talk to her, maybe get some closure or just be friends with her. I figured anything that she said would make me feel better about the thing.
I don't know where she lives, what she does, how she is or even if she'd remember me if we seen each other by some freak occurrence. All that I know is that I can't seem to forget what we had. Our friendship, our young love. I miss hearing her voice. Talking to her about my day, listening to her about her day. I feel halfway crazy when I even start to think about it all. If anybody has any comments about the story, or any advice on how to get over this girl, I'm all ears. Or eyes.
I haven't really had a relationship since her, but that's due to personal issues as well. Thanks, and sorry for this giant block of text.