About to pop

[Acapello]

New guy here. Just need to find somewhere to post this so I can get it off my chest.

I somehow feel like life is realy pointless anymore. All I can blame it on is myself. I also feel like I dunno why I am still here anymore.
Im 24 male living in England. I have good health (no problems) and have no career path. I still live with my parents due to me not having no job. All I do is sit on my arse on this god dam laptop, go out to see the same bunch of friends (who have no path aswell) to drink or smoke weed.
I blame myself bcos I started smoking weed/skiving/drinking since I was 16 and i've kinda messed up my life.
I have no direction to turn too. Im sick of this boring life. I want a new life or a challenge but I dont know where to turn.
I want a new/better career than doing boring shitty demoralizing job like pot washer. Ive been looking into teaching English aboard but im finding it hard to get the energy to do anything and I keep on pushing it back.

I feel like im kinda rambling now and probs boring ppl. Ppl on here have 10x more worse problems than me and I feel blessed to my bones at what I have in my life, but mayb im taking it 4 granted.
I just dont know what to do with my life anymore. I feel like a looser. I havnt had a girlfriend in a year due to me not caring/cant find anyone.
I have no qualifications, no pride.

I realy should just quit the weed and my brian would function alot better. But I get so bored/depressed with life that I kinda force the smoke down me to try and forget bout how my life is falling apart just for the next few hours.

Im sorry for this confusing rant but I didnt know where to go. I dont wanna say these kinda things to my parents/friends as they wuddnt understand it tottaly. I feel like im bottling this up so I hope this site can help me focus.

 

[EveWasFramed]

Hi there, and welcome to the forum.

I'd say that you kind of DO have a direction to go in, my dear, and here's why...

You already know what most of your problems are and what you need to do to handle the situation. The fact that you've closely examined your life the way you have, tells me that you're at least serious enough for self-reflection.

Look at this...

Boredom is an emotional state experienced during periods lacking activity or when individuals are uninterested in the opportunities surrounding them.
Boredom is one of our worst enemies in my opinion. It leads us to make poor decisions. It also has the ability to cause worse problems, like depression and such. It's sort of a vicious cycle I suppose. Honestly, to me, you sound BORED (again, boredom can lead to other issues). It's like you're bored with your aimless wandering. You seem to know what you need to do to repair the situation, but you can't seem to motivate yourself.

You're 24 years old and live with your parents. A lot of people would say, geez...24 and at home. Not me. I say...wow, you're still young enough to do something with your life and you parents are obviously willing to let you live with them a bit longer, so you have a unique opportunity to do something positive for yourself!
Your "rant" wasn't at all confusing by the way. You have good health and a roof over your head. Make the most of the chance you have to do/be something. Is school an option? Some sort of training? And get from behind your laptop too. If all your friends are moving down the same road you are (the road that you OBVIOUSLY dont care to be on), then try to remove yourself from that influence as often as you can. I'm not suggesting that you dump your friends, mind you.
How is your relationship with your parents? Do you really think they wouldn't understand, or is that an assumption? I'm a parent. I was also young once and often found myself bored and kind of aimless. Give your parents a chance to understand and maybe to help you if possible. Most parents WANT to help their children succeed in life.

You should look deep inside yourself and try to find what it will take to motivate you. You obviously have a good enough head on your shoulders that you can examine yourself in an honest way, and that will help. I'm sure I'm not even telling you anything you don't already know, but sometimes it helps to hear it from a third party. Break the cycle, man. You can do it. And when you do, your possibilities will be almost endless.

Good luck and welcome to the forum!

 

[Nina]

Acapello--
I saw your post as very clear and well put. I agree with everything Eve stated and think you have a lot of potential. You're looking at your situation clearly so the weed has only cut back on your initiative and not your ability to reason with yourself about your situation. If you can motivate yourself into action for just a few hours one day and maybe a bit more the next the movement alone could prompt you further. Less weed each day will leave less of that sedative effect in you as well. You can do this...

 

[Badjedidude]

Welcome to the site.

 

[SofiasMami]

Ive been looking into teaching English aboard but im finding it hard to get the energy to do anything and I keep on pushing it back.

Hi-
Do it, do it, do it!
You're in a rut but we all get into ruts sometimes. That's part of being human. But you can get yourself out of it too.
You're 24? You're just starting out - no way have you messed up your life.
I went to London when I was 20 for 2 years and it changed my life.
The ability to move on is already within you - you just have to tap into it.
Welcome to the site, by the way. Keep us posted on how you're doing!

Teresa

 

[Brian]

I realy should just quit the weed and my brian would function alot better. But I get so bored/depressed with life that I kinda force the smoke down me to try and forget bout how my life is falling apart just for the next few hours.

I think you have kind of a vicious cycle going on, there...I'd say start by dropping the weed, dropping the booze, and you'll probably need to drop your friends since I'm going to go ahead and guess they smoke, too. If not, eh, keep 'em or whatever.

Find a shitty job after that and work there until you figure out a path; we mostly all end up having to do it because the good jobs take work and credentials to get. It's not too late to get these credentials; hell, I'm 22 and just barely in to college, basically. Regardless, you have to be able to bill yourself as motivated and sharp to get started at all, and it sounds like your lifestyle -not necesarilly living with your parents, but the other stuff- is keeping you from that.

Personally it's been my experience that the people who work a nitty-gritty job before going to school have a better perspective on society and the world than people who jump directly in to university fantasy land. More common sense, too.

 

[Badjedidude]

Personally it's been my experience that the people who work a nitty-gritty job before going to school have a better perspective on society and the world than people who jump directly in to university fantasy land. More common sense, too.

Although jumping straight into college life doesn't necessarily automatically preclude a person from being able to gain a sense of the world from the ground up... I have to agree. I've seen a lot of spoiled, unrealistic dumbasses during my time in the university where I'm getting my degree.

What I hate to see most is those stupid kids who come up from high school expecting college to be like it is in the movies: partying, drugs, tons of sex, just a wild, fun time with no worries! BULL ******* honeysuckle. Maybe those kids have trust-fund daddies, but I (and 99% of college students) PAY to learn and get my degree. I don't have time to dick around and act like a booze-addled brat.

It pisses me off to see these freshies walking around like they're unbeatable gods who have all the time and money in the world to waste while they spend their evenings creating interesting police records for themselves.... and spending entire course periods texting and looking at porn (PORN! IN CLASS!!).

*shakes head and sighs heavily*

 

[Just_Some_Dude]

Personally it's been my experience that the people who work a nitty-gritty job before going to school have a better perspective on society and the world than people who jump directly in to university fantasy land. More common sense, too.

yep, by age 10, i was mowing lawns, cleaning garages, painting decks, and working in my dad's businesses.

i've worked as a:

- fast food restaurant employee
- pizza delivery person
- gas station attendant / clerk
- factories - woodworking, metal cnc lathing
- shipping and receiving, fork lift operator
- line cook, prep cook, short order cook
- bartender, barback

all before finally going back for the third time to college and actually finishing a degree. now i work as a mechanical technician in many different aspects. some of these guys who have either been doing it their entire lives OR who came right out of tech school at 18 and never had to do any other bullshit job...don't have a clue.

 

[iBreathe]

Hi there, and welcome. =)

Ftr, Nina and Eve had some great points. Your life is only beginning and the fact you realize what needs to change means you are possibly smarter than you give yourself credit for. Be strong, you can do this.

 

[epsom]

it's never too late to change your life alex. We know that deep down inside of you there is a strong desire to be different than what you are now. Teaching english abroad seems like a good idea so keep on working towards your aim.

P/s: Cut back on the weed

 

[Asterli]

I sense that you lost your purpose in life. I've read your post and I think you have hit rockbottom. You can't sink any lower but look at it this way you can't sink any deeper and the only way is up.

I 'had' a friend once who had really great plans for his life and only saw, in my case, euro signs in his eyes. The only problem was the lack of motivation. I feel that this is something to focus on. How can I win back my motivation and make something good out of my life.

My friend is at an age wherein it is difficult to start something new again but the thing I can say for you is that now is the time to do it. If you wait, all the possibilities will pass and you become too old to make out of life. Find out what you really want to do and put all your energy in pursuing it.