Constant feeling of lonliness.Any help?

[Enchantress]

Ok I know that this had been said a hundred times before,especially here but I came to this forum for that reason in the first place because if i say what i have to say now in some other place people will probably not take this seriously.Well,I'm a 15 year old girl and I think I have a tendancy to easily feel quiet alone,depressed and down.And I can't find a reason for the way I feel.Do you know that feeling when u are sarrounded by a thousand people but still feel and know that you are so alone and by yourself? That's how I feel.This feeling haunts me nearly every night now,i usually get that lonely feeling at night. I have a mother who loves me alot but I am not at all close to her.I never told her a thing.And I cant tell her how I feel I just cant and I dont want.She's so much different from me in everything and all beliefs in life .My father died 4 years ago when i was just about to turn 12 and the more i grow up the more i feel the pain of this because i really loved my father.I hate that part of my life.I sometimes talk to him into the sky and just tell myself that he'll hear me.I think that really did affect me though i was young.His death,I mean.I have a bestfriend whom I love so much ,person who undestands and knows the true me the most but still ignored that topic when i tried to tell her about how lonely i feel.I have many other close friends but I don't see them much.I'm a loner by nature I like to spend time by myself and i need it but i dont know if overdoing is taking its toll on me.I am single.Never been in a relationship.
I don't know if i really am lonely or even depressed or whether im just bored,unchallenged and unmotivated in life.
Somebody enlighten me?
BTW if somebody wants a penpal or feels the same way as me I'd love it if someone wants to speak to me.I want to make friends around my age.Thanks alot.I know I wrote way too much.

 

[hellopanda]

I know what you're feeling. Though I do have to say, it's good that you're not in a relationship because that is usually just a whole new can of worms in high school. I am also a loner by nature, though I do find that if you just find a reason to hang out with people, it helps. Talk to your mom, your friends, or just express what you're feeling more. Take up new hobbies, go to events, call your friends and arrange to hang out. And if you need anyone to talk to, PM me? :]

 

[DrawingCircleCircles]

it could be that your best friend just did not know how to help you or felt bad that she did not know what to say not really just flat out ignored you on purpose.

 

[bianhua]

Do you know that feeling when u are sarrounded by a thousand people but still feel and know that you are so alone and by yourself? That's how I feel.

i have the same feeling as yours. but i am not the same age as yours. but i want to say to you, only the mutual love can cure a lonely soul, and only the lonely soul feels the need of love severely. they are loners, yet they are also true lovers, they suffer, for their love is too tender, even a tiniest feeling would cause the hurt of heart. for they are really sensitive. sensitivity doesnot mean lunacy, on the contrary, it means you are still living, for you can feel, and feel intensely, that's the very meaning of being alone, yes you are alive. can the dead feel lonely or pain, of cause not, for they are dead, cannot even heard what you're shouting, not to mention your whisper. but if you're heard by the living, even before you open your lips, they'd have already know what you want to say, for they are the true listeners, they are fairies, and can even understand the language of the little birds. so donot be upset, for at least, i am listening to you, with all my mind, and attention, and is praying for your happiness. believe in love and believe in hope when you are not loved or in despair.for without them, even you are living in the multitude you'll still be all alone. for there is no love in them. but if you are feeling a love that really existes there, and can touch the innermost of your bleeding heart, then even if you're in the wilderness, you'll not feel any loneliness, but will be in a very glad mood from the rising of the sun to the rising of the moon, for the love is budding in you.

 

[Enchantress]

Thank you everybody who has replied to me.It makes me feel better just knowing somebody read this and cared to reply back =]. I too think I need more stuff to do,I have too much time to think.If i don't have all that free time I wouldn't think much or feel alone.I hope I get better when school starts and I have alot of company and alot of work to do.And yes,I know that relationships can cause a whole lot of new problems especially at my age but I think if I had someone I would have been much less lonely though =]
@ Bianhua all what you said was truly touching and inspiring but actually I don't have someone to love.I'm still waiting for that person to come along .
It's morning now so i'm in high spirits but its usually night when I get the creepy dark feelings and feel like my life is hopeless so till night comes I should be fine everyday .
Thanks again.You'll see me around the forum talking to the other loners out there.

 

[bianhua]

It's morning now so i'm in high spirits but its usually night when I get the creepy dark feelings and feel like my life is hopeless so till night comes I should be fine everyday .

i am very glad you feel fine now, though loneliness still haunts your innocent spirit when dark night comes. but donot worry about that, and remember someone somewhere all the time is caring about you, and hope your wellbeing, though he(or she) himself is still in this constant hopeless loneliness, yet he(or she) still strives to love and to be loved.
so if you feel lonely, please give this thread a glance, and know someone here is wishing your happiness, and would like sing a song for you when you feel low, and say a hi to you when you feel you're neglected. and i want to quote a line of a lyric by yoko ono, it's-
"Remember love, remember love,
Love is what it takes to live."
wish you a good night