I need an outsider to look at my crazy life.
I was once married and had 2 kids, 1 has special needs. About 10 years ago there was a car accident with a drunk driver that killed my wife and one of my kids. Afterwords my mom moved in with my and my special needs daughter. I kept working as a pottery professor full time, stopped making pottery in my spare time, and started writing books.
The next year I bought a dual use building and renovated into a home, studio, and show room. My mom moved with us and for the last 8 years I only work at the collage 3 days a week (about18 hours). I work at work at my home studio 3 days a week (about 21 hours). By 1:45 pm every day (unless I'm kiln firing the gas kiln) I'm in the shower and spend the rest of the day with my mom and daughter. There are times that I will work on a book or there is a studio showing in the afternoon, but dose not happen that often.
My mom more or less works as my personal assistant. She ships all of my book sales and deals with most of my studio showings / sales.
For about the last year I have not been happy with my life, but at the same time I'm not able to identify what it is. I just need a change of some sort. I have 3 semesters left on my collage contract and if I want to stay I will need to sing a 2 to 5 year contract in the next 2 months. Dating with a special needs daughter is rather difficult as I feel that were a package deal. Last year my books and studio made made $80,000 after taxes / payroll.
I'm not truly in dept, but every few years I make a large purchase and get a 2 year loan. Right now I'm paying off a van. 3 years ago I got a new car. I have been dreaming of a second gas kiln so I can make larger work. If i stopped working I have about 5 years worth of savings I could live off of.
Over the last 9 months I have seen 2 different therapist. They did not helped much. They both confirmed that I'm a crazy, disheveled, artist, but I have known that for about 30 years. I stopped seeing the first one once she did some research on me and brought up arts background / training.
What life changes are meaningful?
What brings out the spark in life?
I was once married and had 2 kids, 1 has special needs. About 10 years ago there was a car accident with a drunk driver that killed my wife and one of my kids. Afterwords my mom moved in with my and my special needs daughter. I kept working as a pottery professor full time, stopped making pottery in my spare time, and started writing books.
The next year I bought a dual use building and renovated into a home, studio, and show room. My mom moved with us and for the last 8 years I only work at the collage 3 days a week (about18 hours). I work at work at my home studio 3 days a week (about 21 hours). By 1:45 pm every day (unless I'm kiln firing the gas kiln) I'm in the shower and spend the rest of the day with my mom and daughter. There are times that I will work on a book or there is a studio showing in the afternoon, but dose not happen that often.
My mom more or less works as my personal assistant. She ships all of my book sales and deals with most of my studio showings / sales.
For about the last year I have not been happy with my life, but at the same time I'm not able to identify what it is. I just need a change of some sort. I have 3 semesters left on my collage contract and if I want to stay I will need to sing a 2 to 5 year contract in the next 2 months. Dating with a special needs daughter is rather difficult as I feel that were a package deal. Last year my books and studio made made $80,000 after taxes / payroll.
I'm not truly in dept, but every few years I make a large purchase and get a 2 year loan. Right now I'm paying off a van. 3 years ago I got a new car. I have been dreaming of a second gas kiln so I can make larger work. If i stopped working I have about 5 years worth of savings I could live off of.
Over the last 9 months I have seen 2 different therapist. They did not helped much. They both confirmed that I'm a crazy, disheveled, artist, but I have known that for about 30 years. I stopped seeing the first one once she did some research on me and brought up arts background / training.
What life changes are meaningful?
What brings out the spark in life?