So, I had a second date with someone. Doesn't happen very often I can tell you!
It turned out it was going to be the very kind of date that is the reason I hate dating: very awkward, me trying to make small talk but it was just so much pressure and expectations to be a laid-back, fun and flirty guy so all I could do was basically tense up, and I'm pretty sure she felt the same way.
If I was a girl, I would probably not give myself another chance. Why would I? I don't like feeling awkward, and there are lots of other guys on the Internet (where we met). Guys who can probably make me feel better.
Anyway, when we split she gave me a very close and long hug. It felt like it was a good-bye-forever hug and that she wanted at least some intimacy from me; something she could've only had if it was the last time we met. The hug made me weak to my legs, almost like a kiss!
I guess most of the problems would be solved if I didn't tense up, then I could actually be a flirty laid-back guy and manage conversation. Maybe I need to focus more on what I feel. If I feel awkward, maybe that should be a hint that we need to do something else, and not just plow right through. But that's what I'm used to, I never listened to my feelings and desires very much.
It turned out it was going to be the very kind of date that is the reason I hate dating: very awkward, me trying to make small talk but it was just so much pressure and expectations to be a laid-back, fun and flirty guy so all I could do was basically tense up, and I'm pretty sure she felt the same way.
If I was a girl, I would probably not give myself another chance. Why would I? I don't like feeling awkward, and there are lots of other guys on the Internet (where we met). Guys who can probably make me feel better.
Anyway, when we split she gave me a very close and long hug. It felt like it was a good-bye-forever hug and that she wanted at least some intimacy from me; something she could've only had if it was the last time we met. The hug made me weak to my legs, almost like a kiss!
I guess most of the problems would be solved if I didn't tense up, then I could actually be a flirty laid-back guy and manage conversation. Maybe I need to focus more on what I feel. If I feel awkward, maybe that should be a hint that we need to do something else, and not just plow right through. But that's what I'm used to, I never listened to my feelings and desires very much.