Difficulty finding partners when your gorgeous

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mgill said:
i do agree that people should not expect from their partners that which they don't have-especially when it comes to physical fitness.

Well I work out 3-4 nights. Not wanting to sound like an arsehole here but there's certain things I just can't find attractive. I'm more likely to see a 30+ woman eating fast food on the train home than in the gym.

How many plus size male models do you notice in the media? Self improvement is kind of a joke when all it means is meeting some default expected norm that won't get you noticed.
 
0...zip...none. You never see a plus sized male model. I do wonder what people think of the "dad bod" meme thing. Is that a way to try to make chubby guys a norm?
 
Nicolelt said:
0...zip...none. You never see a plus sized male model. I do wonder what people think of the "dad bod" meme thing. Is that a way to try to make chubby guys a norm?

or a short male model.  or a male model without a 6 pack.  of course, ironically many of them are gay.

i think most women are OK with a dad bod as long as the man is tall & good looking as a good male body is only a plus for them as opposed to being a firm requirement (like height & an above average face).  of coursem when a man has good height & face genetics he can always put in the work to get buff (Chris Watts is a good example of this). most men, on the other hand, rate a women's body first and anything additonal is a benefit.
 
TheRealCallie said:
Just because someone eats fast food doesn't mean they are unhealthy or fat....

some can get away with it when they are younger but it will catch up with them in the long run.  you cannot abuse your body for years without any negative repercussions.  also, people can look fit on the outside but have poor health too.
 
Also....
https://www.cosmopolitan.com/uk/fashion/g12157785/plus-size-male-model/


mgill said:
TheRealCallie said:
Just because someone eats fast food doesn't mean they are unhealthy or fat....

some can get away with it when they are younger but it will catch up with them in the long run.  you cannot abuse your body for years without any negative repercussions.  also, people can look fit on the outside but have poor health too.

Grabbing fast food isn't going to give you poor health unless that's ALL you eat and you do nothing else.  That's just another example of judging something you know nothing about.
 
TheRealCallie said:

none of these guys are obese-they look like football players & some are in better shape than the average man.  a far cry from the plus sized women models, many who are morbidly obese.


TheRealCallie said:
Also....
https://www.cosmopolitan.com/uk/fashion/g12157785/plus-size-male-model/


mgill said:
TheRealCallie said:
Just because someone eats fast food doesn't mean they are unhealthy or fat....

some can get away with it when they are younger but it will catch up with them in the long run.  you cannot abuse your body for years without any negative repercussions.  also, people can look fit on the outside but have poor health too.

Grabbing fast food isn't going to give you poor health unless that's ALL you eat and you do nothing else.  That's just another example of judging something you know nothing about.


you actually have no idea what i know and what i do not know.  in case you are interested in educating yourself instead of spouting your usual emotional rants, perhaps you would be interested in what the actual science shows: 

[https://nutritionfacts.org/video/everything-in-moderation-even-heart-disease/


TheRealCallie said:
Mark Wahlberg is 5'8.  Andrew Frew is 5'7.

Wahlberg is an actor and 5'8 is almost average height. i never heard of Frew but a google search shows he is a rugby player.  although perhaps they have done modeling neither is a professional and would likely have never gotten gigs if they were not famous in other capacities.
 
Just Games said:
It can even end in disaster!They don't always choose the right partners,the wrong ones choose them because they are tall and attractive, not beneficial for a long relationship.


AmyTheTemperamental said:
Do all the reasonable people believe they are gorgeous to begin with?

I don't know, but other people think they are geourgeous...it can be a burden??

In my little circle,I know not really representative, but two attractive tall men that were chosen/asked out by their partners,both of their relationships ended in disaster.I know of four short,fat /skinny average looking men that have long term partners.



Just thought I'd remind people that four guys I know between 5ft 2 and 5ft 6 have got off first base with women.Maybe it's an english thing.
 
TheSkaFish said:
TheRealCallie said:
Mark Wahlberg is 5'8. 

What he lacked in inches, he made up for with good vibrations:

[youtube]Zjk4CCVxWZM[/youtube]

tenor.gif


But for real, Mark Wahlburg was my first celebrity crush, and is definitely one of the hottest guys imo.
 
Nicolelt said:
TheSkaFish said:
TheRealCallie said:
Mark Wahlberg is 5'8. 

What he lacked in inches, he made up for with good vibrations:

[youtube]Zjk4CCVxWZM[/youtube]

tenor.gif


But for real, Mark Wahlburg was my first celebrity crush, and is definitely one of the hottest guys imo.

I got that gif on my phone :)
 
TheRealCallie said:
Just because someone eats fast food doesn't mean they are unhealthy or fat....

Going by appearances clearly they are overweight and unhealthy.  As said, I see older dudes in the gym all the time.
 
Also a lot of tall people want to be shorter.Like if they fancy a partner who's really there match but alot shorter it always has to be the taller one that has to be spontaneous when kissing when they actually prefer their shorter partner to be the instigator.Like say 6 Ft3 and 5 ft six average height ladies.The only way is for the shorter person is to yank your head down to have a snog.Or get on a steep ladder,sit on your lap.This can cause neck ache or whiplash especially if the shorter person is aggressively spontaneous. Also as Rodent said if you paranoid about your height and attractiveness and just want to fit in,how many tall people have a stoop because they want to be shorter especially tall attractive teenagers.
 
Just Games said:
Also a lot of tall people want to be shorter.Like if they fancy a partner  who's really there match but alot shorter it always  has to be the taller one that has to be spontaneous when kissing when they actually prefer their shorter partner to be the instigator.Like say 6 Ft3 and 5 ft six average height ladies.The only way is for the shorter person is to yank your head down to have a snog.Or get on a steep ladder,sit on your lap.This can cause neck ache or whiplash especially if the shorter person is aggressively spontaneous. Also as Rodent said if you paranoid about your height and attractiveness and just want to fit in,how many tall people have a stoop because they want to be shorter especially tall attractive teenagers.

I've actually always wanted to be taller.  Maybe that's why I like heels so much.
 
I looked at the male plus-size models and I also thought they were far from obese and football player also came to mind, maybe a strongman in the making.  I was actually hoping for some underwear models to properly judge their physique. Still seemed to be a long shot from someone like Tess Holliday though.

Just Games said:
Stay with me Rodent this is a bit off the wall.But how do you know attractive people are not seen as ugly to some people.Many people are attracted by wit and brains,charachter not attractiveness they are not interested, possibly brainwashed that attractive  people are unattainable,aloof which can be a turn off aswell and can be seen as ugly .Often as not this is because the attractive person is shy.But people don't see that they assume all attractive people are confident.Therefore their dating pool is limited because the people they really want,like nerdy,average (Whatever that is)intelligent people to date are unattainable because they are turned off by attractiveness so are not interested.I actually feel sorry for attractive people.I bet they suffer more than average people in dating..how can we assume they are happier than average people and get better opportunities in finding partners,opportunities maybe they don't really want because they want to work for them not jump the queue because of their attractiveness.
Say for example you find yourself sitting next to Pierce Brosnam(James Bond) in a restaurant, you ask for a selfie with him and he sais "no" with the air of aloofness.Like many people grade him as attractive but at that point you would think he's ugly.You get me!

It's not off the wall. I personally think a lot of celebrated attractive people are mediocre or even ugly, particularly women BUT I think my issue is actually with the layer cake make-up they are often wearing that makes them look like dolls. It could certainly also be the case because I'm a straight guy, but I don't feel that way about attractive guys. I might actually just be an anomaly though. Of course not a 100% of the population think the same way, these are are averages too. We don't need to find every beautiful individual personally attractive to gauge whether they have attractive features in general.

A person does not become literally ugly or unattractive because individuals think they are unattainable or rude/aloof. I think we have to settle on the word attractive actually meaning "very good looking" or this will go all wonky. I don't assume all attractive people are confident...is this actually a belief people hold? Because I'm not even aware of it being a minority opinion of mine. As I pointed out before, you can have issues of self-image and they can make you feel less attractive and even actively reject people because of your neuroticism and insecurities, but that doesn't make you literally ugly. I think hardly anybody finds attractive features ugly on their own, but instead because of other associations they make with a person having those features.

This is not primarily an argument about happiness. I think this comes down to having choices again rather than not having them - a familiar argument we all know from online dating sites. "They want to work for opportunities and not jump the queue"...I think this just goes back the hyperbolic billionaire's case again. "I really wish I didn't have so much money and so many choices." I'm not convinced...I'm really not.

On your Pierce Brosnan example: See paragraph 2. He does not become literally ugly. You just got rejected and that hurt you, perhaps made you go for different people or simply not him in particular BUT that depends on your personal rejection sensitivity. We all know those bullshit statements that truly jaded people give in the face of that. "You're not great anyway".
 

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