Don't have many friends, does that hurt my chances with girls?

[SighX99]

I just moved to a new area for college beginning of this year. I live off campus, don't have roommates and don't know where the parties at usually. I don't go clubbing or bars. I feel weird going to those places by myself. this girl just dumped me a month ago. I'm getting over it. but now I'm wondering, since I don't have a lot of friends, is that the problem? (i only have few friends in where I live, like barely 3 or 4. There are classmates and acquaintances but thats it. I've been here for almost 11months now and I still dont have a lot of friends. I think I have problem making friends because I would feel weird to get some dudes number to hangout, or actually hangout with friends. I don't know why. social anxiety probably.

But, when it comes to girls, does having a lot of friends matter? I'm starting to get over my ex... but now I'm wondering if that was the reason why she dumped me because all I do is hangout with her and like 2 friends. I just got over somebody and I really want a relationship to fill that void. so i turn to online dating. lets just say the experiences I have been having online isn't good. i get the dates, but... I dont want to sound conceited lets just say that I couldnt be physically attracted to the girls I met so far. pictures of themselves can only do so much. My sister hates the fact that I'm doing this. And I have been thinking, maybe I should focus on making friends instead of trying to get a girlfriend? Whats your thoughts? thanks.

 

[Seeker]

No, it won't matter to a girl if you don't have friends, as long as you don't cling much to her because of it. But I get what you are saying, as friends would help you to give some personal space to the girl too, and not make you needy with her. You already have 3-4 friends, though, so my recommendation would be to work on building trust with them, and once you feel that your companionship needs are covered, then go looking for a girlfriend. This tactic will keep you from finding a non-suitable partner for you, or have a girl for the sake of having one, even if you two don't fit together.

 

[Midnight Sky]

Lovers with friends is a good way to make friends too.

 

[Tiina63]

I agree with Seeker.

 

[ladyforsaken]

What Seeker said.

And yes I do know how we may crave for that special someone at times. But there's nothing wrong with making friends, while still craving for that special someone. Who knows, you might get to meet someone through them? Or one of them could be someone you become close with.. anything is possible, as long as you take the chance.