Don't think I am ever going to get a girlfriend

[snow]

I tend to have crushes on nerds. Unfortunately, they often didn't ask me out!

Yeah I agree with pretty much everything...I've been much better about body language the last year or so. I had a friend once who asked me why he couldn't get a girl, and his teeth explained everything. Lol

I believe most lines and techniques are seen through very easily (unless you have really good timing), so as long as the guy is in control, uses correct B.L., and talks about things that don't bore (or scare) the girl to death. He should have a chance. Though of course you will still get rejected, it can't be allowed to affect you.

Thanks!

 

[mimizu]

I hardly care about this (and many other things) anymore... whoever has a girlfriend, great for them, whoever doesn't, doesn't. I've become comfortably numb. ;>

 

[jetstream1983]

I wouldn't mind a girl with a PhD. I just have a strong feeling that most women want men with lots of cash. Just the fear that this may be true puts a lot of dread in me.

 

[lonelygirl]

Jetstream,

You do have a point. If you reduce male/female relations to the basest point, THEN:

Men want a beautiful woman (usually according to Society's views of beautiful women:

Tall, extremely thin yet miraculously curvaceous, beautiful face, nice teeth, YOUNG, smart but not too smart...sexy but not too sexy, etc.

Women want a rich man (in the sense that the man should be at minimum middle class; preferably upper middle class to upper class.)

Look at the evolutionary logic of this. Men want youth and beauty. Youth and beauty signifies that the woman is fertile. She is able to bear children and she is able to have the youth, strength, and energy to raise them.

Women want money and power. The most powerful man in the clan of the cave bear ;-)
would be able to protect and provide for his woman and children.

This all makes sense. Now that we are no longer living in caves, we are still seeking these very deep needs.

You always find exceptions to the rule, though. There are men who honestly don't care about looks, and women who honestly don't care about money.

 

[AaronAgassi]

lonelygirl, I'm still waiting to see you work your magic for Josh! The suspense is killing me!

 

[lonelygirl]

Aaron, I'm not sure what you mean? I'm just here to provide love and support to all our members, including you.

 

[Josh]

lonelygirl, I'm still waiting to see you work your magic for Josh! The suspense is killing me!

There is no way for it to work for me because I have the wrong mind set about the whole thing. I have became too bitter anymore for real socializing and I tend to have the attidude now that I am successful so women should be drawn to me I guess it's something like I think that I deserve to have the women I want because I have worked so hard in life.

Now of course I know this is wrong but I am pretty sure somewhere in my mind this is my thinking. Also another huge factor is I simply do not understand how to talk to a girl at all or even people in general. Now everyone says its simple but to me its not I use my example that I figure how many molecules of H2O there in in 5 Liters now thats simple to me but most people wouldn't have a clue how to do that.

 

[lonelygirl]

Wow, Josh. That's very interesting to me. I love minds like yours--I'd like to believe that I'm logical and rational, but as you can see from some of my posts, I do tend to lose my head from time to time.

Working hard means that you've contributed to the world--but unfortunately, we humans at this time in history seem to live in a very shallow society. Youth, beauty, money, and power are worshiped above all else.

Remember that "Great spirits have always encountered violent opposition from mediocre minds."

It's okay to be scared of interacting with other human beings--even now, sometimes, I'm very scared. But I try to force my way past all the self-doubt and forge ahead. I've forgotten how old you are, but I do think that these social skills can be learned at ANY point in time, when you are ready.

 

[AaronAgassi]

Aaron, I'm not sure what you mean? I'm just here to provide love and support to all our members, including you.

I thought that you had deterimined to offer some guidance to Josh, and perhaps even some match making. Perhaps I misunderstood.

 

[AaronAgassi]

Josh, I wonder what are all of those at all successful ugly old farts with sweet young things hanging off their arms doing, that you are not?

 

[Josh]

Josh, I wonder what are all of those at all successful ugly old farts with sweet young things hanging off their arms doing, that you are not?

Guess I am not old yet I am still pretty young really I am only 22 but I figure by around age 25 or so I should be successful enough to atleast get a gold digger or something by then I should have every done and be working as a pharmacist.

 

[lonelygirl]

Josh! You made me laugh with that gold digger comment. You seem to be quite the chivalrous gentleman--I think you can find someone who will like you for being YOU. The fact that you will be a pharmacist with a steady income and reliable job will be the icing on the cake!

 

[AaronAgassi]

Mo one can predict such future outcomes, and only Josh can prioritize for himself.

 

[keeper]

Hi Josh,
I believe that you deserve more than a golddigger: you're still young, and I think you're also a good person. I know some golddiggers, they are really squalid in my opinion. I think we don't need an arm candy: leave them all to old farts and dumb rich lads

 

[AaronAgassi]

I do not consider the question of deserving. I only wish the best. Though I so share keeper's implicit preference. Personally I find sex industry repugnant and destructive. Though, to be fair, ours are not the only values or priorities. As the saying goes, the difference in sex for free is that ultimately, it costs more. We only cling to the cherished hope that it will all be worth the while. And, again, to be fair, even gold-digger's are feeling people too, and vary in character as do we all. Why, some have even pretty much declared a code of ethics and values on national television. And any clear hierarchy of values can be a saving grace. Thus, we need not agree with the choices of other consenting individuals in order to acknowledge them with respect. And I, for one, can hardly yet claim sufficient acquaintance with Josh in order to so authoritatively contradict him about how he understands himself or who he might ever choose to become. When we presume to advise Josh, then Josh is the only one who needs to be satisfied.

 

[keeper]

Of course, AaronAgassi, if Josh prefers a golddigger he's free to get one. I was only expressing my opinion, not advising him.
Golddiggers are feeling people and vary in character, I know it's true because I've learnt it by knowing some of them, and I don't share their values. Maybe they find my values ridiculous, and I find their values squalid, that's why I wouldn't get along with a golddigger - besides I have no gold in my pockets, so...

 

[AaronAgassi]

Indeed we may stand with the ridiculous, and apart from the squalid, keeper. But yes, eventually, it always comes to the bottom line! So which will you choose to be, Josh, squalid or ridiculous? Which do you bear (or bare) more bravely?

 

[lonelygirl]

I think that it's not just a choice in life between ridiculous and squalid!

There aren't just two types of women in life, anymore than there are just two types of men.

We're all human. Gold diggers have feelings, too! I find gold digging only to be disgusting when it's done under pretense and lies.

If a girl is very upfront with her man that she loves him for his money and social prestige, and he still wants her, then it's a fair 'deal.' I, personally, have never been a gold digger. If I loved someone I would love them regardless of income. At the same point, there comes a time when a man with a reliable job (whether prestigious or not) becomes more attractive to a woman. Namely, her nesting phase of ages 25 and up, when she is looking for a husband to mate with.

 

[AaronAgassi]

LOL!

Squalor can be ridiculous too!

You cannot serve two masters, love and mammon.

Women need equal economic opportunity for sexual freedom in order to follow their hearts.

 

[keeper]

I can't really understand where does this conflict squalid/ridiculous comes from. I've used the two terms not to describe two categories of persons among which one has to choose: I've used "squalid" to refer to my personal opinion about some golddiggers; and "ridiculous" to describe a hypothetical judgement of my values coming from a golddigger.