Felt I had to lie

[constant stranger]

"People generally like sex" eh? Well I'm afraid I didn't, not really. It's humiliating to admit but there always seemed to be something 'not quite right' and I felt bad about myself, my partner and the various acts themselves.

It wasn't a gender identity confusion either. My sexualized response is clearly oriented to women.....but managing a man/woman relationship called for social skills, or something, that just baffled me. Around age 30 I quit initiating any new involvements and didn't respond to any approaches, either.

Now I'm in my mid fifties. Women in the 'friend zone' works perfectly well, but what about the rest of my life? Frankly, dating, pursuing a relationship, arranging for a rendez-vous with an expectation of some romance....whatever one calls it.....intimidates the hell out of me.

 

[ardour]

I'm just plain unattractive. I suppose that means I have "issues" people will have valid "concerns" about, and will need to lie just to pass as normal. Ah well...

 

[LeaningIntoTheMuse]

Luckily, my mom is more understanding.

But I get this kind of crap from the rest of my family. I just pretend to be asexual or gay, it's easier than explaining that I'm too unattractive socially to get a girlfriend.