Hard Days

[deprimise]

It's days like today where I feel like I don't belong where I currently am. I currently go to UC - Santa Barbara. Known as a party school. I'm not the kind of person who goes out on the weekends and drinks and has sex constantly. In fact, I would be happy just hanging out with some friends, but most of my friends here at school won't do anything unless it benefits them. And then there are days like today where I sit in my dorm room doing nothing. I sit here and think to myself all day long listening to music and watching movies. I see myself here, lonely. It feels like there's no one here for me at all. Like if I were to go missing, no one at this school would notice nor care.

I miss my pals from highschool. I miss the people who I was so close to that I was able to call them brothers. People who were there when I needed them through thick and thin. And now seeing that I don't have these people here anymore makes everything horrible. I don't have people here to make me laugh, who are kind to me, or cheer me up. Just this thought makes me wish I didn't make the decision to go to school so far away.

It's days like this where I sit in my dorm room and cry. Cry for hours on end. I try to make it so no one hears me, because I don't want people who I do not really know worrying about me. I wish my bestfriends were with me. I don't know what to do here anymore.

 

[Cavey]

Sorry that you're feeling so bad today, Deprimise.

I can't offer you much advice, but I hate to think of anyone sitting alone and crying; God knows I've been there at times in my life. Hopefully just knowing that someone is here listening is of comfort to you. I guarantee that there are others here that have had similar experiences and can offer something more useful.

 

[Sci-Fi]

I know how you're feeling right now, wish I could give you some advice. All I can say is to just hang in there.

 

[9006]

It's amazing how many variations of this similar scenario there are, so you're not the only person going through something like this. You're right, it sounds like your different to how everything works there, it's something different than your used to, and of course it doesn't have the friends that you value.

Is there no way you could get in contact with your friends via the internet? This may make things easier.

 

[BrokenInside]

*Hugs*
Don't cry please! Do you have contact numbers of your old buds?

 

[deprimise]

I do have their numbers, it's just that talking to them over the phone or on skype isn't the same as being around them...

 

[BrokenInside]

I know but atleast you would be able to speak your heart out.