How can I kill my loneliness???

[realandtruelove]

Hi everybody, I think we all came here because we are lonely or feel lonely, I like the idea of "A LONELY LIFE" as a place, a room, or a club we meet in to help ourselves to live with our loneliness.

I ask myself what is loneliness, is it a feeling or a condition, is it a continous feeling inside me and will last forever with me, or it's just a condition I'm facing, or actually one condition after another.

It helps when you speak about your loneliness, and I found it so relaxing here to speak about it, where others can understand you, and can listen to you, and where you can feel that you're a normal human because others have similar situations.

Sometimes I think that my loneliness is like a person controlling me, my life. How can I kick that person inside me named "LONELY" away? How can I kill that feeling? I've read that some of you decided to travel to another place or meet new people, will it help?

Let's try to interact more, help each other with ideas, what do you think???

 

[joeynicdao]

I consider lonliness both: a feeling in that you could be living a life that most others would be jealous to be living yet you'd still feel lonely and a condition in that it's more of a situation and in most cases, isn't a life sentence. Whichever way you decide to consider it, a lonely life sounds a lot more depressing to me. I think traveling is a great idea in that you're getting used to trying new things, seeing different ways of life, and end up seeing the good in people when people elsewhere are nice to tourists. Other important components include having friends, having someone to express yourself and your feelings to, being able to feel good about yourself, and having something positive to take your mind off your loneliness.

 

[Luna_luce]

Hi everybody, I think we all came here because we are lonely or feel lonely, I like the idea of "A LONELY LIFE" as a place, a room, or a club we meet in to help ourselves to live with our loneliness.

I ask myself what is loneliness, is it a feeling or a condition, is it a continous feeling inside me and will last forever with me, or it's just a condition I'm facing, or actually one condition after another.

It helps when you speak about your loneliness, and I found it so relaxing here to speak about it, where others can understand you, and can listen to you, and where you can feel that you're a normal human because others have similar situations.

Sometimes I think that my loneliness is like a person controlling me, my life. How can I kick that person inside me named "LONELY" away? How can I kill that feeling? I've read that some of you decided to travel to another place or meet new people, will it help?

Let's try to interact more, help each other with ideas, what do you think???

I think maybe you can start by trying to see who people around you are. (Maybe we should all do this ) Like, do you have any work colleagues that you could have a drink after work? Or a coffe spot where you could go and drink coffee?

Today I talked to my therapist about all that.I'm thinking about organizing a club of some sort, but I am waiting to gain the courage for it ...

 

[realandtruelove]

Do it, don't hesitate if you can, I would come to meet people in such a club if it exists.

 

[Luna_luce]

Do it, don't hesitate if you can, I would come to meet people in such a club if it exists.

Well, why don't you organise one? And btw I'm sure support groups exist in Australia or wherever you live.

I know, I think I'm gonna do that after my exams. Though I still hesitate a little....

 

[Luna_luce]

I've found some things on the net:

...there are numerous ways you can increase your socialization:

Initiate interactions with friends and family. Call friends or family members and talk or chat, or invite them to spend time with you. Have a party, exercise together, eat at a restaurant or just hang out. If your schedule is too busy to allow for this sort of thing, then change your schedule to open up a little time.

Introduce yourself to neighbors and other people you come into contact with frequently. Say hello when someone walks by and ask how they are doing.

Join groups. Participate in religious services, civic groups, service groups, hobby groups, exercise groups, gyms, and similar sorts of community groups. Take a class that interests you. Regular attendance is important; it takes a while before people sense that you're no longer a stranger.

Advertise yourself. Create a profile on a dating website, or describe your plight anonymously on a free classifieds service like CraigsList (where interested people can email you anonymously).


Keep in mind that it is the quality of your relationships and not their number that determine what benefits you will receive from socializing. It is the deeper, caring relationships that provide benefits, and not the shallower temporary ones. For this reason, even if you are good at socializing, take steps to deepen your relationships. Do things for other people and test to see whether they reciprocate. Pursue those relationships which do reciprocate your investment, and avoid those which do not. Risk letting a few special people know your intimate thoughts. Do this slowly so as not to overwhelm. Relationships have to be reciprocal to become real friendships. Give-and-take is essential.

Taken from: http://www.mentalhelp.net/poc/view_doc.php?type=doc&id=9776&cn=353