how many people thought of ending ur own life?

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i lost count how many times i want to do it

i been here 4years
and b4 that i wanted to die
and i think of it almost everyday

so 365*4=1460 days

maby thought of it about a 1000times

tryed,well i am still here so didnt went good

edit:

make that 1001 :(
 
You've fought the war of life so long that you no longer fear death. It happens. But don't you want your pain to amount to something? Don't you want to survive the battle and end the war? Hope is a necessity.

I sound negative sometimes but I do have a lingering hope inside for a new day. That's why I don't want to die. I no longer fear death, but I will not welcome it. I truly believe you have hope somewhere inside-- you must. If you didn't, you wouldn't still be here. Faith is blindness, but hope is X-Ray vision and a sword to fight the reaper where he hides in the cliffs of your consciousness.
 
A sad thread to read.

Only seriously thought about suicide once (i.e. had a 100% plan) and it was this year. Now, I'm glad I didn't go through with it, but at the time I couldn't think that way.
 
Twice, one for stress by cutting my wrists, and the other because I was upset that I have no friends and tried to jump from the 5th floor.
 
I don't believe suicide in and of itself is a necessarily bad thing. In fact, in some situations, suicide is probably the ideal solution.
Given that I have family that benefit from my survival, suicide isn't an adequate solution for me.

I must admit, however, that I am "ending my own life" or at the least shortening it greatly by not caring for my health.
Heart problems run in the family. My grandmother has had several strokes AND heart attacks before finally dying from heart related ailments. My father has heart related ailments that require medication for the rest of his life. My mother has an odd heart ailment that could potentially shorter her life.
Myself? Well, I don't really care about my health anymore.
 
Two Sundays ago....

MTrip said:
I know how I'd like to die: Of a heart attack, while in the arms of a curvy, nubile redhead. Preferably at the moment of orgasm.

Anyway, ^ this made me chuckle. lol
 
I've thought it several times, tbh even a few weeks ago. I attempted once when I was in HS. The only that stopped me was throwing the stuff back up. I was pretty messed up at the time.
 
Never considered it...discipline keeps me going for the most part. However I was never put in that much of a serious dead-end situation either that left suicide as the only and the easiest way out of a particular mess.

Apart from that, it's still too much of a gamble since no one knows what comes afterwards. I can't stand the thought of never enjoying a good piece of music again...or a video game.
 
I have had near-constant suicidal thoughts for 21 years. I made two attempts when I was quite young, but not after that. I did, however, engage in a LOT of self-destructive behavior.

I didn't make any further attempts for two reasons -- first, I had genuine hope that my life would get better. It was just a teeny glimmer of hope, but it was there. Second, I had an elderly cat with a chronic illness. I knew that if I died, she would get put down in a shelter. She is the only living creature who ever loved me and she was the only reason I stayed alive. She died in March. I'm still absolutely devastated. I got another cat pretty quickly because I thought it would help, but we don't have the same kind of bond so I guess I'm "at risk."

It has become apparent that my life really is hopeless (please, no one tell me that there's always hope -- that simply isn't true). Basically, I'm just waiting around until I get bored with my current stash of video games.
I do weird things to prevent myself from being impulsive. This will sound weird, but my apartment is filthy and I can't get myself to clean it. I think I'm protecting myself in a way, because I'd never want to be found dead in an apartment this dirty. So, yeah, I'm not doing anything any time soon. I'm 35, though, and I doubt I could live to 40. That said, I said the same thing about being 21 and being 30, and here I am. I wish I'd succeeded at 15. I'd have saved the whole world a lot of disgust and trouble, and I'd have saved myself a lot of trauma and pain.
 
I thought about committing suicide, and was indeed going to until I realised that there isn't a way out of life. When "you" die... it would seem you return to nothingness, the state "you" were in before "you" were born.
This nothingness, which is no-thing, by definition doesn't exist.
There is no escaping life. I can kill myself, but what good does it do me? Consciousness will still be here. The body will die, but more babies will be born again tomorrow. It's not "you", but you know what I mean... It's the same thing. Names will change, our faces will change, our bodies will change, but the life still continues. When you realise you are not your identity or ego, or personality, you realise that you are consciousness. And so you are everyone, so to speak... and that means when you die, there again you will be, as another being, who knows where, who knows what, but you will be experiencing this horror for ever! Consciousness is trapped.
 
EVERY....SINGLE..............DAY.

There isn't a day that passes where I DON'T think about it.
 
Throughout my childhood I thought about it quite regularly but I'd feel guilty and selfish if I did, upsetting my mother is something that absolutely cripples me and seeing / knowing or even thinking she's crying is agonising *squirms*
 
I have occasionally entertained the idea of ending my life, but only in the form of immature fantasy, wanting to escape a tough situation while sending a message to those who weren't nice to me. Never seriously considered it.

Assuming some belief in God, an afterlife, meeting dead relatives again etc. then what would you say, "Uhh, sorry I wimped out"? While if death is the end it's throwing away everything for literally nothing.

Rodent said:
Apart from that, it's still too much of a gamble since no one knows what comes afterwards. I can't stand the thought of never enjoying a good piece of music again...or a video game.

There'll always be something worth keeping going for, even if it's just distractions.
 
There is one reason I can think of for suicide which I consider valid: Being terminally ill. If you have malignant cancer, or have just been DXed with Alzheimer's or some other disease for which there is no cure, & which guarantees weeks or months of utter agony, why would you want to stick around? I certainly wouldn't, & I've had occasion to think about it more than once. Suicide is indeed senseless & tragic, as long as there is a future for you with some chance of happiness or contentment in it. A terminal disease guarantees you will have neither.

Suffering is usually endurable when it has a purpose, when you can figure out a reason for it. But depending on your health, there may come a time when you suffer tremendously--& pointlessly.

They have assisted suicide in Switzerland....you need a doctor's okay for it & it is limited to those with terminal conditions. There are a few hoops to jump through because they rightly will not bump someone off just because he is depressed & wants it himself. It is limited to those with catastrophic, incurable illness. And it's a crying shame that in my country, only one state--Oregon if I'm correct--has anything like it.
 
Lately, I think about it more and more. I am stuck, though.
If I didn't have family that would miss me terribly, I would probably have done it long ago.
The thought of no longer existing - basically disappearing to nothing - is happy to me. Right now, it is something to look forward to.
I might feel differently tomorrow...

I am mostly just surviving just to survive. I feel selfish because this life has been wasted on me when there are so many other people who could have done better with it. I'm pretty much rubbish.
 
I was released from a hospital a few months ago for attempting it. It was awesome. I got to go to the hospital in handcuffs and a police van. Had my own cell in the hospital for a month. Wouldn't reccomend in case it fails.
 

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