I believe I'll stay single for the rest of my life.

[ardour]

I don't believe that people who are in love with each other have to marry in order for their love to be recognized.

This was the point i was trying to clear. The one twisted by society.

traditionally, in a relationship, you have a vow/promise to the other (and you do it together). that was all it was. Sometimes you have a ritual, a feast, whatever. then someone labeled it marriage. So it was like Vow -> marriage.
however, today it seems like it is backwards. you have marriage then vow. so marriage -> vow. plus, the meaning of the vow seems to have diminished over time, and is continually diminishing as a whole in society. (not to say that there arent still people that really understands love and vow).

I've given gifts though, and I've received a few, so that line doesn't make any sense to me.

i was trying to say that the current 'marriage' is less of a vow than a proof/label. the society has degraded so much as to popularize the act of vow/promise and diminish its meaning.

so a piece of paper isnt 'proof' that you love [me]. well, neither is your gift to me a proof that you love [me], right? thats what i was trying to say about gifts. *this only applies if we are speaking of marriage as a label.

i am to think that those that say they dont believe in marriage are speaking about the current meaning of 'marriage'.
i guess in the end.. it would be required to define which 'marriage' do you not believe in. the traditional or the current view.

Marriage has been part of almost all cultures for thousands of years, granted not always in a monogamous form.

People have degraded its significance through divorce, particularly for the reason of merely being bored of one another (“I’m no longer happy”), or where they can’t be bothered working through problems. That and people shacking up beforehand in a ‘try before you buy’ situation, actually increasing the chances of getting divorced later on.

There’s nothing wrong with a public statement of commitment towards someone you care for, it’s highly honourable.

People want to dismiss marriage these days because the ‘lifelong’ aspect doesn't appeal, not because it’s dated or meaningless.

 

[Moe'sTavern]

Marriage has been part of almost all cultures for thousands of years, granted not always in a monogamous form.

People have degraded its significance through divorce, particularly for the reason of merely being bored of one another (“I’m no longer happy”), or where they can’t be bothered working through problems. That and people shacking up beforehand in a ‘try before you buy’ situation, actually increasing the chances of getting divorced later on.

There’s nothing wrong with a public statement of commitment towards someone you care for, it’s highly honourable.

People want to dismiss marriage these days because the ‘lifelong’ aspect doesn't appeal, not because it’s dated or meaningless.

Not all marriages work. People grow apart; it happens. Lifelong partnership is great if you can achieve it. But for those who can't, there's always the option to try again with someone else.

 

[ardour]

Not all marriages work. People grow apart; it happens. Lifelong partnership is great if you can achieve it. But for those who can't, there's always the option to try again with someone else.

And that now socially acceptable option fundamentally alters attitudes and behaviour, making people less willing to work through problems and overlook the other's shortcomings. Result: relationships are less likely to last.
(no I didn't say that women should accept abusive situations in case someone's going to jump)

 

[perfanoff]

^ Honestly society seems to have developed a big nice ADD

 

[blackdot]

One day you will wake up and realized that having a girlfriend isn't so important !
Probably happen when your 30.

Or you will one day wake up and realize having a girlfriend is the only thing important in life and if it happens in your 30's then you are doomed cause women in their 30's no longer date.

 

[LeaningIntoTheMuse]

I refuse to get married until all gay and lesbian couples can marry.

It doesn't make any difference, anyway, because it's not like someone wants to actually be with me.

 

[jeffcallahan]

Whether you think you can, or whether you think you can't: you're right.

It sounds very woo-woo, but mindset is EVERYTHING.

This might help, it's something I've taught the people I coach...and it take 3 minutes a day:

As a practice, I do the following every day. This takes 3 minutes. You have the time to test this out:

Once a day as you're about to fall asleep, play your favorite song, and remember great things that you've done in your life up to this point. Remember them cinematically, like you're watching a movie. Feel the great vibes coarse through your veins.

Remember when you told a joke and everyone laughed...

Remember when you got that cute girl's number and she said "Call me!"...

Feel it.

Do this exercise every night for 2 weeks.

Each session should only take 3 minutes. 3 mins. x 14 days = 42 minutes.

If you tell me you don't have 42 minutes over a two week period, I will find and slap you. How many minutes have you spent checking if that girl you like has a boyfriend on Facebook?

Exactly. Get to it.

 

[Dissident]

What if you've, like... only accomplished half victories? Never made everyone laugh? Never gotten a cute girl's number (or wanted attention)?

Forever alone. ;_;

 

[jeffcallahan]

What if you've, like... only accomplished half victories? Never made everyone laugh? Never gotten a cute girl's number (or wanted attention)?

Forever alone. ;_;

Then celebrate and focus on the victorious half.

No matter how small it is...that time that stranger smiled at you.

Those small victories will change your psychology. Then, you will start to view the world differently...paving the way for more victories.

 

[drr26]

I'm 23 no relationship yet

But being less 'picky' would help

Imagine if the most amazing person (inside not looks) wanted to know you properly... would you turn her away because she is not the 'race' you want

Personally I choose to give most girls a chance, I'll be honest I don't want anybody with kids but other than that I have no preference. I see more of a chance for myself being this way, than only wanting barbies for example.

Just my two cents, also if people see these posts over and over then just skip them, people are allowed to write on here yes?

 

[Shydana101]

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