Destructotron
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- Joined
- May 2, 2011
- Messages
- 17
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Basically it's another one of those typical unrequited love situations. Well, since I'm only 19 I suppose using the term ''love'' is a bit ridiculous, so I guess infatuation is a more accurate description of what I felt for that one girl.
You all know what I'm talking about- being heavily attracted to a girl, constantly thinking about her, wanting to be with her etc etc etc. I went through that phase, took me a while to swallow the fact that I didn't get her but hell, I got over it. It actually terrified me how easy it was. This whole experience has permanently cheapened the whole concept of love, a relationship and just the overall idea of being together with someone.
There is another girl in my class who is attracted to me. Before I knew about it, I treated her like any other girl but once I learned of it, I just started ignoring her. Only now did I realize that I was taking out my suppressed negative feelings about my own rejection on her. I took it out on her by making her feel the same way I felt, when I was in that situation. And ****, was it satisfying.
I got immense pleasure from rejecting her. She's a really nice girl - friendly and funny, but I just don't find her that attractive. On a hotness scale 1/10, she'd be a 6. As such, she became a platform from which I could absorb mental satisfaction.
She has now since stopped talking to me. Though we get along, she no longer seeks my attention or sends looks my way or even invites me to parties. And I feel great about it. I feel like I accomplished a goal I set for myself... and that sounds very sick and twisted when I actually think about it.
I didn't used to be this way, only after the realization that the object of my affection doesn't feel the same for me, did I become like this.
So, is this just another phase I'm going through, or should I check in a cell at the local asylum?
You all know what I'm talking about- being heavily attracted to a girl, constantly thinking about her, wanting to be with her etc etc etc. I went through that phase, took me a while to swallow the fact that I didn't get her but hell, I got over it. It actually terrified me how easy it was. This whole experience has permanently cheapened the whole concept of love, a relationship and just the overall idea of being together with someone.
There is another girl in my class who is attracted to me. Before I knew about it, I treated her like any other girl but once I learned of it, I just started ignoring her. Only now did I realize that I was taking out my suppressed negative feelings about my own rejection on her. I took it out on her by making her feel the same way I felt, when I was in that situation. And ****, was it satisfying.
I got immense pleasure from rejecting her. She's a really nice girl - friendly and funny, but I just don't find her that attractive. On a hotness scale 1/10, she'd be a 6. As such, she became a platform from which I could absorb mental satisfaction.
She has now since stopped talking to me. Though we get along, she no longer seeks my attention or sends looks my way or even invites me to parties. And I feel great about it. I feel like I accomplished a goal I set for myself... and that sounds very sick and twisted when I actually think about it.
I didn't used to be this way, only after the realization that the object of my affection doesn't feel the same for me, did I become like this.
So, is this just another phase I'm going through, or should I check in a cell at the local asylum?