I'm a *****.

[Tigershark]

Almost everyone I know has told me that before they really knew me, they were convinced I was a *****. Even intimidated by me. I feel like that inside, I'm the exact opposite of intimidating. In fact, I'm pretty much terrified of everything. I just don't like people, I guess. I actually almost always try to avoid meeting new people, having conversations, just anything & everything social. I find that I just don't like anything about anyone. I completely know how cocky that sounds, & you know, I'm probably that. I think, though, I just have such a hard time accepting my faults (of which I believe there are many.), that I see these same faults in other people & it turns me off of them completely. I can't accept myself, & can't except others for having the same problems. I don't know.

I know, I know. I should just change! I should just try to be more accepting! It's really hard, though. It's like I just get irritated & bored whenever I am with people. & in new situations with new people, I can get incredibly anxious, quiet & generally look uninterested. I just want out of the situation. I really only ever feel comfortable if my boyfriend is with me. He's a lot like a security blanket for me.

I guess this is kind of two issues tied into one, & it's not really put together well. I just felt like I really needed to get it off my chest. I haven't written, spoken, or typed out any of this to anyone before.

Does anyone else feel this way? Has anyone overcome it?

 

[evanescencefan91]

try not to worry about it tiger shark

my roommate is really tall, so she often seems really intimidaing to other people

haha I'm not really too fond of most people either they're loud and full of germs GAh

but there are some nice quiet and clean people out there who are quite nice and cover their moths when they cough and it's quite nice



i know it's hard to change I've been saying I'd get up early enough to get to class on time for five years

LOLS

I don't see that ever happening, but it's worth a try if you can

what if you went and met some new people with your boyfriend maybe that'll help some



good luck

 

[Tigershark]

Haha, well it's definitely not my height! I'm only 5'2" =P

I think my problem definitely is more geared towards those shitty little parts of people's personalities that stick out like a sore thumb to me. I guess because I see all these things in myself. I have to live with myself so I pretend it's not there, I don't have to spend much time with other people, so it's really obvious to me & I choose to not be around them/talk to them. It ends up making me a very lonely person, though. I think the worst part is just that I know this about myself, but can't stop. ugh! haha. =(

That last part though is really good advice! My boyfriend & I are both thinking about going back to school this fall. We may or may not live together, but we'll be in the same city. This definitely opens up a lot of opportunities to meet people in a situation that isn't going to put me too far out of my comfort zone.

 

[Joseph]

Hey, *****!

*waves in a friendly fashion*

 

[Badjedidude]

I would be a ***** too but I'm a man so they call me an ass.

lol

 

[floffyschneeman]

If you know what's making you bitchy towards other people and you know that it's a personal issue that is hindering you to connect to others and also making you lonely, why not make an effort to change it?

 

[edgecrusher]

i know how you feel with some of that. i am the same way with people. i get easily irritated by people often too. i just have a low tolerance for stupidity and ignorance and i feel like i see that in most people. yes i know how that sounds but oh well. i am the same in social situations. i often get bored just sitting there talking about whatever and i am generally the quiet one. when we have people over the house more often than not i am in my room by myself playing a video game. i guess some people are jsut like this.

 

[Tigershark]

If you know what's making you bitchy towards other people and you know that it's a personal issue that is hindering you to connect to others and also making you lonely, why not make an effort to change it?

This is exactly my problem, actually. I try to give people a chance, try to give myself a chance to not be so critical & terrible of others, but I always end up right back where I started.
Honestly, deep down I just don't like myself, & that's what I have to work on first. I'm just struggling with that part.

---

& edgecrusher, I can't tell you how much everything you said relates directly to how I feel. When I used to live with my roommate, she was incredibly social & would usually have people over all the time. I would often hang out for an hour or so, get bored with them & go fresia around on my computer, or whatever, in my room. It was often as if everything they talked about seemed so mundane & stupid, that I would have to leave. I know how that sounds, right? I'm an elitist, terrible person. Looking back on all the ways I've acted, though, I think that I'm the stupid one, & I just can't accept it as the truth.

 

[Joseph]

I would be a ***** too but I'm a man so they call me an ass.

lol

I think the proper term is BIOTCH

 

[Tigershark]

I think the proper term is BIOTCH

Haha, is this to mean that the male equivalent of a ***** is a Biotch? If so, I'm not sure I understand. D=

 

[Joseph]

I think the proper term is BIOTCH

Haha, is this to mean that the male equivalent of a ***** is a Biotch? If so, I'm not sure I understand. D=

You are correct! You'll have to ask Snoop Dogg.

 

[Tigershark]

I think the proper term is BIOTCH

Haha, is this to mean that the male equivalent of a ***** is a Biotch? If so, I'm not sure I understand. D=

You are correct! You'll have to ask Snoop Dogg.

We usually kick it on Tuesdays, I'll be sure to let you know what's up with that. I was totally sure Biotch was just a way of calling a girl a *****, only using more letters for emphasis.