I'm Going Insane

[Ghost]

I have barely spoken to anyone lately, and it is not going to let up anytime soon because of the situation I'm in. I'm having more intense mood swings, and my insomnia is coming back.

What do you do when you are very lonely? How do you cope?

I went to sleep, and the moment I woke up I could feel the anxiety weighing on me. It is the kind of anxiety that asks "What is the point of anything?".

I wish I had friends who I could relate to well and hang out with, but I have too difficult a time relating to anyone. I wish I was a different person every day.

 

[Lonesome Crow]

I bascially get out of the house get sunshine.

Make myself get out to prevent isolation...even though i hated being around people.
There was no piont in life...but I also relized I wasn't thinking so correct and wasn't well.

it was suggested I seek mental health...I could had taken that route.
But basaiclly I knew I had cabin fever from isolating myself for a year..lmao

Holy crap man...left to my own vise...it's like the devil's workshop.

I re attended my support group meetings again...that helped a lot.
It was touch and go there at first. I hated attending those with a passion.

I help other people. For a while I had to help an old man get around or take him to the hospital
all the time...No piont in life..but lots of pionts in his...lmao

I volunteered working at food banks...No piont in my life...plenty of pionts for straving people.lol

I go to the mall or shoping alone....anything to help me be around people.

I used to make myself sit or lay down at the park for hours at a time.
I go bike riding everyday.
I life wieghts or excercize.

I was actaully talk to a freind tonight about the first time she saw me, of how freaken skectish I was .lmao
That was only 6 months ago...lol

I've been in recovery for a long time...i have a lot of coping tools or living skills.
However they only work if I work it...
I think i was a weeeeeiii bit rusty..lmao

Get out of my house was a major major step.

 

[Pasha Selim]

When I am home, from 7 PM to 7 AM, I stay with TV turned on all the time, even I don't watch. I enter this forum though I am not active (now I am at work and also not active). From about 9 PM to 11 PM I enter another forum too, where people chat with a psychoterapist (in my native language). For the rest of the night I go to chat room here and fall asleep with my laptop alonside, having the beeps of people's replies as background. I like those sounds a lot, I feel like I am sleeping among people talking, like in a rail carriage, a camping bedroom or a fireplace gathering.

 

[Alex]

When I am home, from 7 PM to 7 AM, I stay with TV turned on all the time, even I don't watch. I enter this forum though I am not active (now I am at work and also not active). From about 9 PM to 11 PM I enter another forum too, where people chat with a psychoterapist (in my native language). For the rest of the night I go to chat room here and fall asleep with my laptop alonside, having the beeps of people's replies as background. I like those sounds a lot, I feel like I am sleeping among people talking, like in a rail carriage, a camping bedroom or a fireplace gathering.

Sorry to go off topic but that internet chat with a psycho-therapist sounds good...What is your native language? Do you know of an English forum that would do this?

 

[Oceanmist23]

Hey Ghost *hugs* I remember those days (and nights).
If I had to stay inside my flat I would, like Pasha Selim, leave the TV on most of the time. It did help. I would leave it on a channel that showed good sitcoms, that seemed to work best.

I also used music a lot and I still do. I would find happy and uplifting songs to listen to, and would only listen to sad songs if I found them to be very beautiful and therefore made me smile. I would learn the lyrics and sing out loud to my favourite songs, that way I would get to use my voice when I didn't have a chance to talk to anybody in real life. Being silent all day didn't work for me. I had to use my voice somehow, so I chose to sing (doesn't matter how crappy my singing is, I'm the only one who's gonna hear it anyway and besides why should I give a **** lol).

Having a pet is a good thing too. If I had a cat I would talk to it all the time (I do that with my parents' cat, which I've known for almost 14 years), and it's a great form of company too because you can give and receive affection from a pet. It really does work. Both cats and dogs can sense when their owner isn't happy, and will often come up to you and cuddle you to give you comfort.

I do recommend getting out of the house, even if you don't get to interact with anyone. On sunny days I would go for walks along the river here, listening to birds and insects, and the water rushing by. I would bring my camera and take pictures of flowers, animals, whatever interesting patterns I would find in nature, and houses I liked the design of. It's good to get sunshine, it helps with your mood.
On rainy days I would put on full rain gear and go for walks along the same trail as before. I think the sound of rain gushing down helped somehow. I got lots of fresh air and I didn't sit in silence in my flat.
I would also recommend going grocery shopping whenever you need just a couple of items. This way you'll be getting out and be around people more. Just go to a different grocery store every time if you can. I have 4 to choose from in my neighbourhood, so that way I'd be around different people all the time.

I definitely recommend taking vitamin & mineral supplements. It helps to stabilize your mood and your overall health. I've taken vitamin & mineral supplements for the past 8 months, and they have definitely helped me in several ways. Some changes I can physically see, others I can feel.
A good quality multivitamin is better than nothing. If you're a man get one that doesn't contain iron. For insomnia I recommend taking Melatonin. It's the best natural sleep enhancer you can get. Get 1mg tablets and take one an hour before you're planning to go to bed. Melatonin helps with your mood as well. You can read about it here: Melatonin

If you have anyone you can call for a chat, call them. If you can arrange to go out for lunch with someone, do it.
Keep yourself occupied with something, be it hobbies, work, studies, exercise, housework, shopping, chatting, just anything to keep you busy. Sitting around in silence doing nothing ain't gonna do you any favours.

All the best to you

*Hugs*

 

[Pasha Selim]

When I am home, from 7 PM to 7 AM, I stay with TV turned on all the time, even I don't watch. I enter this forum though I am not active (now I am at work and also not active). From about 9 PM to 11 PM I enter another forum too, where people chat with a psychoterapist (in my native language). For the rest of the night I go to chat room here and fall asleep with my laptop alonside, having the beeps of people's replies as background. I like those sounds a lot, I feel like I am sleeping among people talking, like in a rail carriage, a camping bedroom or a fireplace gathering.

Sorry to go off topic but that internet chat with a psycho-therapist sounds good...What is your native language? Do you know of an English forum that would do this?

Sorry I don't know of an English chat. Anyway it's not big deal with that chat. It's just one different therapist every evening talking with people on predefined topics for 1 hour, so don't imagine something like getting exclusivity for my problems.

Related to this thread I forgot to mention the worst day for lonely people. I really feel I am going insane too on Sundays. It is so-called "Sunday neurosis", term coined by the psychiatrist Viktor Frankl. I am always beaten by that.

 

[catwixen]

I read a Victor frankl book. What was sunday neurosis? In the camps?
I find Sundays hard to deal with because it is so quiet, like no life outside, everyone must be at home, relaxing.

 

[Skorian]

I definitely recommend taking vitamin & mineral supplements. It helps to stabilize your mood and your overall health. I've taken vitamin & mineral supplements for the past 8 months, and they have definitely helped me in several ways. Some changes I can physically see, others I can feel.
A good quality multivitamin is better than nothing. If you're a man get one that doesn't contain iron. For insomnia I recommend taking Melatonin. It's the best natural sleep enhancer you can get. Get 1mg tablets and take one an hour before you're planning to go to bed. Melatonin helps with your mood as well. You can read about it here: Melatonin

Some good advice amoung all the rest.

 

[Alex]

When I am home, from 7 PM to 7 AM, I stay with TV turned on all the time, even I don't watch. I enter this forum though I am not active (now I am at work and also not active). From about 9 PM to 11 PM I enter another forum too, where people chat with a psychoterapist (in my native language). For the rest of the night I go to chat room here and fall asleep with my laptop alonside, having the beeps of people's replies as background. I like those sounds a lot, I feel like I am sleeping among people talking, like in a rail carriage, a camping bedroom or a fireplace gathering.

Sorry to go off topic but that internet chat with a psycho-therapist sounds good...What is your native language? Do you know of an English forum that would do this?

Sorry I don't know of an English chat. Anyway it's not big deal with that chat. It's just one different therapist every evening talking with people on predefined topics for 1 hour, so don't imagine something like getting exclusivity for my problems.

Related to this thread I forgot to mention the worst day for lonely people. I really feel I am going insane too on Sundays. It is so-called "Sunday neurosis", term coined by the psychiatrist Viktor Frankl. I am always beaten by that.

But what is your native language as I am trying to learn French, Spanish and German and would probably find this chatroom interesting and a good way of leaning the language aswell...

 

[LonelyDesert]

Ghost I'm new to this site, but I have felt alone most of my life, I'm now 38 and I've had to deal with the same things your going through right now, how do you cope? if anyone here could answer that they would be the next Dr. Phil, it's hard to cope, each day at a time I suppose, "things mean a lot at the time, don't mean nothing later" that statement is very correct in it's meaning, but it doesn't ease the pain and emptiness out there. Go slow and be thankful for your deeper thoughts, most people are afraid to even ask what you have just asked. Take something under your wing, it does wonders with your psyche, I may not leave my cabin sometimes when the mood strikes, but I throw out bird seed and some water out in the desert, it makes a difference when I notice birds, rabbits, lizards, and burros are grateful for the thought, they depend upon me to help, and sometimes that's all I need to pull through the darkest of moments.

 

[Twitchy]

I have barely spoken to anyone lately, and it is not going to let up anytime soon because of the situation I'm in. I'm having more intense mood swings, and my insomnia is coming back.

What do you do when you are very lonely? How do you cope?

Sorry to hear you're going insane. If it means anything, you have a lot of company. Some of the most revered and brilliant minds in the world belonged to complete lunatics. I mean really, aren't sane people boring?

As for how to cope? In my limited experience "day by day". Keep yourself busy. Look forward to hope even when it looks like it isn't there. It's there, it just likes to hide.

 

[Ghost]

I really hate life right now. Why can't I ever be happy? All I can think about is how terrible I am feeling, and I can't sleep. Last night I got two hours disrupted hours, and the night before I didn't sleep at all, though I have had long naps so it isn't as bad as it sounds. I really need to sleep, but my mind is out of control. I feel so inferior. It seems like there is nothing I can do to help myself because I've been like this for a very long time. Would you believe I'm not very tired right now?

I can't stop thinking about how I am bad at so many things. I wish every day I was a different person. I am so angry and my moods fluctuate like crazy. One minute I'm euphoric and loving life, and the next I'm like this.

I really wonder what the point is, why I go on realizing beyond realization, as if sitting in the dark thinking about everything will make it better. There is no point to anything.

 

[Lonesome Crow]

I really hate life right now. Why can't I ever be happy? All I can think about is how terrible I am feeling, and I can't sleep. Last night I got two hours disrupted hours, and the night before I didn't sleep at all, though I have had long naps so it isn't as bad as it sounds. I really need to sleep, but my mind is out of control. I feel so inferior. It seems like there is nothing I can do to help myself because I've been like this for a very long time. Would you believe I'm not very tired right now?

I can't stop thinking about how I am bad at so many things. I wish every day I was a different person. I am so angry and my moods fluctuate like crazy. One minute I'm euphoric and loving life, and the next I'm like this.

I really wonder what the point is, why I go on realizing beyond realization, as if sitting in the dark thinking about everything will make it better. There is no point to anything.

Ghost...you can always reach out for help in real life.

Please understand alot of us had been there in the mind set
at one piont or the other. So please, do not beat up on yourself.
Yes...it's very fustrating at time...because I as much as anyone
else wanted to get up every day and be OK...
It wasn't like that at all...I woke up with a lot of negative crap
running through my mind and ran with it...after I ran with it...
It made me worn out and tired as hell.
mmm..it's bascailly obsessive, complusive thinking.

I don't have all the answers..
But i do have some copping skills or a living program

First i had to understand and accept...a lot of that honeysuckle was in my head.
Self acceptence.
Just by accepting this...when I get an anxiety attacks...I simply just chilled and
sat down and let it pass through me. "this too shall pass"
I stopped beating myself up..I stopped judging and condeming myself.

I disconnected the fucken TV for a while...there was too much negative riff raff honeysuckle on the BOX.
I simply went and got a CD with nature and soft music and set it on replay 24/7...
it calmed me down..because I saw pretty cool images on the screen and hear soothing music all the time.
It didn't solved all of my problems...however I become clamer and relaxed because i wasn't bombared with
the media..sex, violence, dramma...turama...news...commercial of honeysuckle i was lacking and endless fucken problems.
I needed to stop feeding my brain those data.

My brain also release natural chemicles. My thoughts drives my emotions.
If i replay negative honeysuckle or create negative honeysuckle...that's how I'm going to feel..and the brain release chemicles accordingly.
And most of the time. I was on AUTOPILOT...my brain was running the show...not me.
I simply just need to take responsiblities and take charge of my mind.

Well...fresia, if it can do that with negartive emotions...it can do the same with positive thoughts.
Kind of over board...but sometimes I recall a memory of me having a fucken orgazism or whatever happy times
in my life. Then I just hold that feeling all day...My brain releases natural endorphine.
I walk around all day with a smile and feeling good. It just takes practice...
I chose to be happy today...that's it..that simple.
Breaking habits takes around 21 days.
I have to keep it simple like that...I'm just breaking habits of feeling like honeysuckle all the time.

That's why i also go excercizing...my brain release natural endorphine after a good jog.

I also had to deal with my negative inner vioce...
My inner vioce is neatural. It dosen't matter if the message is good or bad...it just plays the message.
I simply just asked or replaced my negative inner vioce with a positive one.
That's it...it's that simple.
I read an article about it years ago...
I felt weird at first but I did notice that stupid ass inner vioce beating up on myself..I simple replaced the old tape
wiht a positive one.

At first I wore a rubber band around my wrist and snap it everytime I catch myself telling myself how much I suck
or life suck...I catch myself faster and faster. Stop the negative tape and play the positive tape.
It just takes practice or applications.

You don't even have to be religouse to figure it out...
In the Bible Jesus..said "according to your faith it is done on to you".
The riddle or answer is that simple.
We all have faith...We all think or belive the sun is going to raise tomorrow...that's faith.

What is your faith ? It's just the way you belive or think.
Change your thinking change your life.

Also look up food for your brain thread...CG posted.
That helps too...Certain food we eat release feel good chemicles in our brain.

I work the 12 steps program..It gose more into dept of peeling away my pains, shame, guilt...etc.
In a nutshell , I get to that piont of letting go of all that negative mental and emotional baggages.
Bascailly that's all my sponsor will tell me sometimes...Just stay positive.

I'll bet ya...you're mind will stop spinning if you make yourself sit down and try to write a gradtitude list
or your assets/good quality list

 

[Starman]

Having a pet can help greatly. My cat gave me a feeling of being wanted and needed and she was a real joy.

 

[Pasha Selim]

But what is your native language as I am trying to learn French, Spanish and German and would probably find this chatroom interesting and a good way of leaning the language aswell...

Romanian.

 

[Ghost]

Thanks Lonesome Crow (and everyone else who has posted).

I just slept for about 13 hours straight.

 

[DakotaDesert]

Ghost I'm new to this site, but I have felt alone most of my life, I'm now 38 and I've had to deal with the same things your going through right now, how do you cope? if anyone here could answer that they would be the next Dr. Phil, it's hard to cope, each day at a time I suppose, "things mean a lot at the time, don't mean nothing later" that statement is very correct in it's meaning, but it doesn't ease the pain and emptiness out there. Go slow and be thankful for your deeper thoughts, most people are afraid to even ask what you have just asked. Take something under your wing, it does wonders with your psyche, I may not leave my cabin sometimes when the mood strikes, but I throw out bird seed and some water out in the desert, it makes a difference when I notice birds, rabbits, lizards, and burros are grateful for the thought, they depend upon me to help, and sometimes that's all I need to pull through the darkest of moments.

Post: #17RE: I'm Going Insane

I have been in the same situation for 4 years. One day, tired of being unhappy, miserable and sad, I made the list of the positive and negative things in my life and decided to make the negative becomes positive. And another list about what I would like my life to be. It took me a year to cope but I did it. Now I am working on making my life the way I want it to be. What helped me the most was to decide to stop living in the past. It is not easy, it takes a lot of energy. Sometimes I wanted to give up but I realized that life can be very short and it is a wasting of time to stay sad or miserable or lonely. I also decided to force myself to accept to allow people to gradually come into my life. One more time, I have to say that it is not easy, I still feel lonely sometimes but I refuse to give up. I found out, at least in my case, that I liked being lonely. It was my excuse to complain and not make any effort to get out of my misery. It is so confortable to think that everything happens because of other people fault. I still have to work everyday on my goal: being happy but everyday it is better. I think it is like trying to be drug free, it is a lifetime fight but it can happen, trust me. [/font]I do not know if I am the new Dr.Phil, but if my experience can help someone, I will be happy.