interested in someone and I hate it !

[EveWasFramed]

i don't think asking married women for dates is the right thing to do. It's pointless and if you carry on doing it you'll get a reputation.

I prefer to treat people with respect. If I find out thru talking to her that she is indeed single, I will ask her for a coffee.

It's my way of doing things.

Awesome reply. Well done.

---

Wow friend, I will say you are an inspiration tome. RReally, I thank you because now I can go out and get better with females. I mean seriously, I see myself in you and I have to say it makes me sick. I mean really, you did everything you possibly could to defeat yourself right from the get go. All you had to do was ask her out. That was all you had to do. Literally, one question and you gave it up.

Why did you give it up. Well when I read your posts. It was your wish that she is married. At first it was just a nagging lie you were telling yourself. The nagging lie that she is married because she has a sexless trophy. Well then that lie spiraled out of control and became your reality. You know the best part of the Web. I can look back at what you said. Guess what, you never confirmed she is married. You were hoping she was married in fact you wanted her to be married so badly that you started hallucinating a wedding ring. You never confirmed that she already had one youjust sspent your time looking for it.

Then you stalked her on Facebook. That is not creepy at all. That was your desire for her to be taken. So incredibly intense was your needto find a rreason for her to not be available that you found a able name. That is all I see a guys name. You see a post that leads you to believe that she is dating or married so you can hate yourself. How do you know this guy is not just someone she just met? In your eyes does one date mean marriage that is not legal? I mean come on, you just had to do one little thing. That thing was to asked her out, and you choose to create your own reality.

Granted what you said about asking out taken females. I can see why you are still single, despite your efforts. You take it upon yourself to figure out if she is single or not. When all you had to do was ask her out. Then during the date put some moves on her and try and seduce her. Guess what, if she is single and looking there will be no rejection. If she is taken guess what she will tell you so and shoot you down. I mean wow, you make it seem like you have to do a background check on the girl before you can date her.

Earlier on I asked what lessons you learned from your past failures. Since you cannot open your mind to see anything but self hatred. Let me learn a lesson for you. That lesson is to ask her out when you get positive reactions. Guess what if all the fears you listed are true, she will tell you. Also drop ths pesky pride or morality. You do not know what her sexual ssituation is. She does, and it is her job to tell you. Let me ask you if you are lied to are you wrong for being deceived? If you believe that you are wrong for following what you think is the truth, then you are screwed. Because that will only lead to self-loathing.

One more thing, you mentioned that past females started dating friends of sorts. That is because you did all the seducing. So all your friends had to do was ask her out. Stop being a wuss and start asking girls out. If you do not do this, you will be alone and miserable. The man downside to being a man, is the fact that we have to be an aggressor when it comes to relationships. Most men will feel no sympathy for you if you just sit around and cry whenever there might be a chance for success. Yes females will coddle you and make you that best bud. However, even they will get annoyed when all you do is tell storieslike tthis one. So quit your desperate struggle to make sure the female in question is taken. If you took even half the effort you put into making sure that there is no reason for you try try into actually trying. Christ you would have a girlfriend and 5 girls trying to be your mistresses. Seriously just take the chance next time. I mean really the only person I can blame for this failure is you and I feel no pity. None, you are a wuss and you got what was coming to you.

Who are you to judge him? I think he handled it just fine. She's taken - so what he checked her relationship status before deciding what to do? That doesn't make him a wuss - it just means he has enough morals not to go after someone who is already taken.

 

[AFrozenSoul]

Who are you to judge him? I think he handled it just fine. She's taken - so what he checked her relationship status before deciding what to do? That doesn't make him a wuss - it just means he has enough morals not to go after someone who is already taken.

First off Eve I refer you to the very first post made by our friend duff

Ive found her on facebook and it doesn't say she is married. I know her name. I didn't sent a friend request.

Second off, tell me who is wrong. Lets say our friend duff actually asked this girl out. She said yes, they date for a couple of months. You know the relationship bliss we all want. So after 3 or 4 months duff learns that said female is actually married. Is duff wrong for trusting her to tell the truth about being single or duff's fault for dating her?

One more question as well Eve. How would you feel if some guy basically stalked you for a couple weeks or months before asking you out?

 

[EveWasFramed]

Who are you to judge him? I think he handled it just fine. She's taken - so what he checked her relationship status before deciding what to do? That doesn't make him a wuss - it just means he has enough morals not to go after someone who is already taken.

First off Eve I refer you to the very first post made by our friend duff

Ive found her on facebook and it doesn't say she is married. I know her name. I didn't sent a friend request.

Second off, tell me who is wrong. Lets say our friend duff actually asked this girl out. She said yes, they date for a couple of months. You know the relationship bliss we all want. So after 3 or 4 months duff learns that said female is actually married. Is duff wrong for trusting her to tell the truth about being single or duff's fault for dating her?

One more question as well Eve. How would you feel if some guy basically stalked you for a couple weeks or months before asking you out?

I read the first post. So what?
And after 3 or 4 months of dating and/or getting close to someone, maybe he gets his heart ripped out? He was being cautious - there's nothing wrong with that. And he didn't stalk her - far from it. You obviously don't know what "stalking" is if you think so.
And don't try to justify what you suggested he do.

 

[5pt7art]

**** you really let him have it didnt you...but it is true what you said....idk the guy but unfortunatley what you stated might be easier said than done.

 

[duff]

Wow friend, I will say you are an inspiration tome. RReally, I thank you because now I can go out and get better with females. I mean seriously, I see myself in you and I have to say it makes me sick. I mean really, you did everything you possibly could to defeat yourself right from the get go. All you had to do was ask her out. That was all you had to do. Literally, one question and you gave it up.

Why did you give it up. Well when I read your posts. It was your wish that she is married. At first it was just a nagging lie you were telling yourself. The nagging lie that she is married because she has a sexless trophy. Well then that lie spiraled out of control and became your reality. You know the best part of the Web. I can look back at what you said. Guess what, you never confirmed she is married. You were hoping she was married in fact you wanted her to be married so badly that you started hallucinating a wedding ring. You never confirmed that she already had one youjust sspent your time looking for it.

Then you stalked her on Facebook. That is not creepy at all. That was your desire for her to be taken. So incredibly intense was your needto find a rreason for her to not be available that you found a able name. That is all I see a guys name. You see a post that leads you to believe that she is dating or married so you can hate yourself. How do you know this guy is not just someone she just met? In your eyes does one date mean marriage that is not legal? I mean come on, you just had to do one little thing. That thing was to asked her out, and you choose to create your own reality.

Granted what you said about asking out taken females. I can see why you are still single, despite your efforts. You take it upon yourself to figure out if she is single or not. When all you had to do was ask her out. Then during the date put some moves on her and try and seduce her. Guess what, if she is single and looking there will be no rejection. If she is taken guess what she will tell you so and shoot you down. I mean wow, you make it seem like you have to do a background check on the girl before you can date her.

Earlier on I asked what lessons you learned from your past failures. Since you cannot open your mind to see anything but self hatred. Let me learn a lesson for you. That lesson is to ask her out when you get positive reactions. Guess what if all the fears you listed are true, she will tell you. Also drop ths pesky pride or morality. You do not know what her sexual ssituation is. She does, and it is her job to tell you. Let me ask you if you are lied to are you wrong for being deceived? If you believe that you are wrong for following what you think is the truth, then you are screwed. Because that will only lead to self-loathing.

One more thing, you mentioned that past females started dating friends of sorts. That is because you did all the seducing. So all your friends had to do was ask her out. Stop being a wuss and start asking girls out. If you do not do this, you will be alone and miserable. The man downside to being a man, is the fact that we have to be an aggressor when it comes to relationships. Most men will feel no sympathy for you if you just sit around and cry whenever there might be a chance for success. Yes females will coddle you and make you that best bud. However, even they will get annoyed when all you do is tell storieslike tthis one. So quit your desperate struggle to make sure the female in question is taken. If you took even half the effort you put into making sure that there is no reason for you try try into actually trying. Christ you would have a girlfriend and 5 girls trying to be your mistresses. Seriously just take the chance next time. I mean really the only person I can blame for this failure is you and I feel no pity. None, you are a wuss and you got what was coming to you.

i couldn't be arsed to read all your post.

But there's nothing wrong with looking on facebook to gain information, i am sure alot of people do this.

I have to use the shop again so it was only sensible to be carefull and not cause any uneccessary problems.

I have no problems asking single women out. Done it loads of times in the last few years !

---

what's important is I still have to go in the shop to buy my stuff. No harm has been done. Im sure we will still talk to each other. I enjoy talking to her so I havent lost that. She may become a friend and you can't have enough of them. And I wasn't that much into her that I feel upset or down about it.

And the facebook stuff ? Stalking ? Hardly ! I didn't send any messages and if somebody wants the public to read their messages then it's up to them. I didn't hack into her account. I found out some information looking at her daughters facebook page which anybody could read. Nothing wrong with that at all ! Jesus ! There are some men who bombard women with hundreds of obscene messages. That's stalking ! In fact I would an apology from the person who suggested it !

 

[AFrozenSoul]

I read the first post. So what?
And after 3 or 4 months of dating and/or getting close to someone, maybe he gets his heart ripped out? He was being cautious - there's nothing wrong with that. And he didn't stalk her - far from it. You obviously don't know what "stalking" is if you think so.
And don't try to justify what you suggested he do.

So, duff is the wrong one for trusting a female to tell him whether or not she is actually single, glad to know.

**** you really let him have it didnt you...but it is true what you said....idk the guy but unfortunatley what you stated might be easier said than done.

Yeah I know, but it had to be said. Better to say the truth rather than continue to enable his bad habits.

i couldn't be arsed to read all your post.

But there's nothing wrong with looking on facebook to gain information, i am sure alot of people do this.

I have to use the shop again so it was only sensible to be carefull and not cause any uneccessary problems.

I have no problems asking single women out. Done it loads of times in the last few years !

---

what's important is I still have to go in the shop to buy my stuff. No harm has been done. Im sure we will still talk to each other. I enjoy talking to her so I havent lost that. She may become a friend and you can't have enough of them. And I wasn't that much into her that I feel upset or down about it.

And the facebook stuff ? Stalking ? Hardly ! I didn't send any messages and if somebody wants the public to read their messages then it's up to them. I didn't hack into her account. I found out some information looking at her daughters facebook page which anybody could read. Nothing wrong with that at all ! Jesus ! There are some men who bombard women with hundreds of obscene messages. That's stalking ! In fact I would an apology from the person who suggested it !

---

Well do what works for you. That is what I would say.. however everything you have written for this entire thread. Proves that what you are doing in fact does not work, but it is your choice to keep doing something that does not work if you want too.

 

[duff]

I read the first post. So what?
And after 3 or 4 months of dating and/or getting close to someone, maybe he gets his heart ripped out? He was being cautious - there's nothing wrong with that. And he didn't stalk her - far from it. You obviously don't know what "stalking" is if you think so.
And don't try to justify what you suggested he do.

So, duff is the wrong one for trusting a female to tell him whether or not she is actually single, glad to know.

**** you really let him have it didnt you...but it is true what you said....idk the guy but unfortunatley what you stated might be easier said than done.

Yeah I know, but it had to be said. Better to say the truth rather than continue to enable his bad habits.

i couldn't be arsed to read all your post.

But there's nothing wrong with looking on facebook to gain information, i am sure alot of people do this.

I have to use the shop again so it was only sensible to be carefull and not cause any uneccessary problems.

I have no problems asking single women out. Done it loads of times in the last few years !

---

what's important is I still have to go in the shop to buy my stuff. No harm has been done. Im sure we will still talk to each other. I enjoy talking to her so I havent lost that. She may become a friend and you can't have enough of them. And I wasn't that much into her that I feel upset or down about it.

And the facebook stuff ? Stalking ? Hardly ! I didn't send any messages and if somebody wants the public to read their messages then it's up to them. I didn't hack into her account. I found out some information looking at her daughters facebook page which anybody could read. Nothing wrong with that at all ! Jesus ! There are some men who bombard women with hundreds of obscene messages. That's stalking ! In fact I would an apology from the person who suggested it !

---

Well do what works for you. That is what I would say.. however everything you have written for this entire thread. Proves that what you are doing in fact does not work, but it is your choice to keep doing something that does not work if you want too.

---

i don't have much chance with women but hitting on married ones - i have even less chance !

It's a shame she is married because I would have done something and you never know what would have happened.

 

[EveWasFramed]

So, duff is the wrong one for trusting a female to tell him whether or not she is actually single, glad to know.

I didnt say any such thing - stop trying to put words in my mouth.
Sure she should tell him - but there's nothing wrong with him checking.

 

[The Good Citizen]

Clearly the point of his original post was that he was interested in someone and given the fact he has asked and been turned down in the past it hurts because he feels he is opening himself up for further disapointment.

As everyone with any common sense has said, checking a relationship status be it via a ring or a friend or an online public profile if its available before asking someone on a date is not stalking. Why do people set relationship status for public viewing? Maybe to LET people know their relationship status? Where is the problem therefore in taking a look to find out?

"Second off, tell me who is wrong. Lets say our friend duff actually asked this girl out. She said yes, they date for a couple of months. You know the relationship bliss we all want. So after 3 or 4 months duff learns that said female is actually married. Is duff wrong for trusting her to tell the truth about being single or duff's fault for dating her?"

Well since you ask you are wrong. All you are considering is if it goes tits up after 2 months Duff wouldn't be in the wrong and whether it would be the women who was at fault. Well clearly yes she would be to blame for not telling but also probably Duff for not checking or seeing a ring on her finger or the fact her facebook status was there all along to tell him the truth. I mean thats just a totally illogical argument. All that's concerned with is who is to blame, it overlooks the fact that Duff would still be hurt by the truth whether he was blameless or not, thats the more important factor.

There is nothing wrong with his methods, he meets women in everyday life, gets to know them and when the time is right asks them out, before he does so, if possible he would like to know their relationship status to save both himself and the women the embarrasement of asking for something that isn't going to happen.

"One more thing, you mentioned that past females started dating friends of sorts. That is because you did all the seducing. So all your friends had to do was ask her out"

That is just lame. You honestly think that Duff has been seducing women into a state of delirium and then leaving them so that they are ripe for the picking for the next guy that comes along? Really? Do you secretly think all women are idiots, slaves to their emotions without the means to making a logical decision?

 

[LonelyInAtl]

It's a shame she is married because I would have done something and you never know what would have happened.

I'd be relieved she was married. That would give me a legitimate excuse not to have to man up and try to talk to her or ask her out. LOL!

 

[duff]

It's a shame she is married because I would have done something and you never know what would have happened.

I'd be relieved she was married. That would give me a legitimate excuse not to have to man up and try to talk to her or ask her out. LOL!

it would have been easy, her shop is quiet, not many customers. Everytime I walk in she talks. Conversation flows easily. I would have said 'do you fancy a coffee sometime ?' - piece of piss.

Alot of the problem is opportunity.

 

[AFrozenSoul]

i don't have much chance with women but hitting on married ones - i have even less chance !

It's a shame she is married because I would have done something and you never know what would have happened.

So I have to wonder why you believe that females are incapable of saying You are so sweet, but I am married. I mean if you had asked her out once you started to get good vibes from her. You would not have had to resort to such methods. So I have to ask, why do you believe females are not capable of telling a male when she is available, interested, looking, not interested?

I didnt say any such thing - stop trying to put words in my mouth.
Sure she should tell him - but there's nothing wrong with him checking.

I was just making sure you planned on actually answering the question that was asked.

Well since you ask you are wrong. All you are considering is if it goes tits up after 2 months Duff wouldn't be in the wrong and whether it would be the women who was at fault. Well clearly yes she would be to blame for not telling but also probably Duff for not checking or seeing a ring on her finger or the fact her facebook status was there all along to tell him the truth. I mean thats just a totally illogical argument. All that's concerned with is who is to blame, it overlooks the fact that Duff would still be hurt by the truth whether he was blameless or not, thats the more important factor.

There is nothing wrong with his methods, he meets women in everyday life, gets to know them and when the time is right asks them out, before he does so, if possible he would like to know their relationship status to save both himself and the women the embarrasement of asking for something that isn't going to happen.

So widows do not wear their wedding rings for sentimental purposes? What about girls who buy fake wedding rings to try and scare off guys? What about girls who are swingers or in an open relationship? What about girls who take off their wedding rings at work. In a retail job that might be a good idea for many reasons. One being that a ring is valuble. What happens when the store gets robbed and something precious like a wedding ring is stolen as well? What about girls who take off their rings at the gym for safety reasons? At the end of the day it is up to the female to decide for herself if she is available. The best way to find out is to make a move. At least then you can say you tried. Plus then you can move onto the next one. Instead of fixating on one for weeks/months at a time.

Yes, technically speaking there is nothing wrong with his methods. Granted one must wonder how amazing one's methods are given ones success rate. You can say quality over quantity, however 0 quantity = 0 quality as well. I do like how you said When the time is right clearly the right time never comes or the right time is wrongly picked. But hey who am I to judge someone who believes a method with a extremely low success rate is superior to a method with a much higher success rate. It is his choice and it allows other men to have plenty more success. So I guess I should encourage him and others like him. That way I can have more females to work with.

I am glad he has his pride. After all, if you avoid rejection you never get rejected. However, at the same time you never learn to coup with rejection and rejection controls your life. However, like I said in the time he spent trying to figure out if she was single. He could have met at least one or two other females to try and seduce. Instead he wasted all his time making sure he would not be rejected.

That is just lame. You honestly think that Duff has been seducing women into a state of delirium and then leaving them so that they are ripe for the picking for the next guy that comes along? Really? Do you secretly think all women are idiots, slaves to their emotions without the means to making a logical decision?

Well... lets see, back when I was... 20 I watched my 25 year old brother hit on a girl he talked to her was getting a lot of good responses. He leaves to go to the bathroom and my younger brother, who is 19. Goes up to the same girl and continues flirting and ends up taking the girl home.

Truth of the matter is that females have different attraction buttons than males. Sure previous females could have been interested in duff, but since he was taking his sweet time. Well they are already excited/ready to date him. Then they meet another male. Who pushes all the buttons and builds her attraction and asks her out. Now she has a choice, wait for the guy who might flake or go for the guy who has just asked her out. For females attraction is transferable. I have seen it in action. However, true some females can control themselves. Just like some males can force themselves to be attracted to uglier females.

 

[duff]

i don't have much chance with women but hitting on married ones - i have even less chance !

It's a shame she is married because I would have done something and you never know what would have happened.

So I have to wonder why you believe that females are incapable of saying You are so sweet, but I am married. I mean if you had asked her out once you started to get good vibes from her. You would not have had to resort to such methods. So I have to ask, why do you believe females are not capable of telling a male when she is available, interested, looking, not interested?

I didnt say any such thing - stop trying to put words in my mouth.
Sure she should tell him - but there's nothing wrong with him checking.

I was just making sure you planned on actually answering the question that was asked.

Well since you ask you are wrong. All you are considering is if it goes tits up after 2 months Duff wouldn't be in the wrong and whether it would be the women who was at fault. Well clearly yes she would be to blame for not telling but also probably Duff for not checking or seeing a ring on her finger or the fact her facebook status was there all along to tell him the truth. I mean thats just a totally illogical argument. All that's concerned with is who is to blame, it overlooks the fact that Duff would still be hurt by the truth whether he was blameless or not, thats the more important factor.

There is nothing wrong with his methods, he meets women in everyday life, gets to know them and when the time is right asks them out, before he does so, if possible he would like to know their relationship status to save both himself and the women the embarrasement of asking for something that isn't going to happen.

So widows do not wear their wedding rings for sentimental purposes? What about girls who buy fake wedding rings to try and scare off guys? What about girls who are swingers or in an open relationship? What about girls who take off their wedding rings at work. In a retail job that might be a good idea for many reasons. One being that a ring is valuble. What happens when the store gets robbed and something precious like a wedding ring is stolen as well? What about girls who take off their rings at the gym for safety reasons? At the end of the day it is up to the female to decide for herself if she is available. The best way to find out is to make a move. At least then you can say you tried. Plus then you can move onto the next one. Instead of fixating on one for weeks/months at a time.

Yes, technically speaking there is nothing wrong with his methods. Granted one must wonder how amazing one's methods are given ones success rate. You can say quality over quantity, however 0 quantity = 0 quality as well. I do like how you said When the time is right clearly the right time never comes or the right time is wrongly picked. But hey who am I to judge someone who believes a method with a extremely low success rate is superior to a method with a much higher success rate. It is his choice and it allows other men to have plenty more success. So I guess I should encourage him and others like him. That way I can have more females to work with.

I am glad he has his pride. After all, if you avoid rejection you never get rejected. However, at the same time you never learn to coup with rejection and rejection controls your life. However, like I said in the time he spent trying to figure out if she was single. He could have met at least one or two other females to try and seduce. Instead he wasted all his time making sure he would not be rejected.

That is just lame. You honestly think that Duff has been seducing women into a state of delirium and then leaving them so that they are ripe for the picking for the next guy that comes along? Really? Do you secretly think all women are idiots, slaves to their emotions without the means to making a logical decision?

Well... lets see, back when I was... 20 I watched my 25 year old brother hit on a girl he talked to her was getting a lot of good responses. He leaves to go to the bathroom and my younger brother, who is 19. Goes up to the same girl and continues flirting and ends up taking the girl home.

Truth of the matter is that females have different attraction buttons than males. Sure previous females could have been interested in duff, but since he was taking his sweet time. Well they are already excited/ready to date him. Then they meet another male. Who pushes all the buttons and builds her attraction and asks her out. Now she has a choice, wait for the guy who might flake or go for the guy who has just asked her out. For females attraction is transferable. I have seen it in action. However, true some females can control themselves. Just like some males can force themselves to be attracted to uglier females.

married women do think I'm sweet. In fact one once told me if she wasn't married she would go out with me. (At the time she was having an affair with a bloke she met on the internet !) - so it was bollocks what she was saying.

 

[The Good Citizen]

AFrozenSoul

Truth is it takes a moment’s glance to see a ring on a wedding finger or 5 minutes to check a facebook status. Its no guarantee either way as to someone's availability but if its there in black and white well you know they aren't available and if at that point you don't want to try chatting up a woman who is spoken for then all credit to him. I mean I don't see that quick additional check being the reason for lack of success; it’s not a wholly flawed method. So really we're just disagreeing on whether it’s worth making that check, which is hardly hear or there really. Beyond that putting off asking for weeks for no good reason is of course not going to help but that’s not so much the issue we're discussing, just whether its worth checking beforehand as to her availability. Everyone's a bit different how they approach it. It just seems such a non issue to condemn the guys approach really.

Regards your brothers, well you can't prove either way of course but I reckon your younger brother would have taken that girl home regardless of whether your older brother had been chatting her up first. I think you'd have to consider yourself a bit of a lothario to be able to whip a woman up into a frenzy of excitment through flirting so that the next guy that comes a long simply has to step up to be pounced upon.

 

[duff]

there are a few women who I like at the moment. It's natural to have a little glance at their hands. Some don't have rings but that doesn't mean they are available, they could be living with someone. I admitt I do take my time before I do anything and most times I come to the conclusion that the woman isn't interested. I have to have some encouragement. It's not like I have a complete downer on myself but I am realistic.

I walked past the photo shop today and looked in. She wasn't in so I will probably go in on Thursday after work. I do need some more frames !

 

[EveWasFramed]

i don't have much chance with women but hitting on married ones - i have even less chance !

It's a shame she is married because I would have done something and you never know what would have happened.

So I have to wonder why you believe that females are incapable of saying You are so sweet, but I am married. I mean if you had asked her out once you started to get good vibes from her. You would not have had to resort to such methods. So I have to ask, why do you believe females are not capable of telling a male when she is available, interested, looking, not interested?

I didnt say any such thing - stop trying to put words in my mouth.
Sure she should tell him - but there's nothing wrong with him checking.

I was just making sure you planned on actually answering the question that was asked.

Well since you ask you are wrong. All you are considering is if it goes tits up after 2 months Duff wouldn't be in the wrong and whether it would be the women who was at fault. Well clearly yes she would be to blame for not telling but also probably Duff for not checking or seeing a ring on her finger or the fact her facebook status was there all along to tell him the truth. I mean thats just a totally illogical argument. All that's concerned with is who is to blame, it overlooks the fact that Duff would still be hurt by the truth whether he was blameless or not, thats the more important factor.

There is nothing wrong with his methods, he meets women in everyday life, gets to know them and when the time is right asks them out, before he does so, if possible he would like to know their relationship status to save both himself and the women the embarrasement of asking for something that isn't going to happen.

So widows do not wear their wedding rings for sentimental purposes? What about girls who buy fake wedding rings to try and scare off guys? What about girls who are swingers or in an open relationship? What about girls who take off their wedding rings at work. In a retail job that might be a good idea for many reasons. One being that a ring is valuble. What happens when the store gets robbed and something precious like a wedding ring is stolen as well? What about girls who take off their rings at the gym for safety reasons? At the end of the day it is up to the female to decide for herself if she is available. The best way to find out is to make a move. At least then you can say you tried. Plus then you can move onto the next one. Instead of fixating on one for weeks/months at a time.

Yes, technically speaking there is nothing wrong with his methods. Granted one must wonder how amazing one's methods are given ones success rate. You can say quality over quantity, however 0 quantity = 0 quality as well. I do like how you said When the time is right clearly the right time never comes or the right time is wrongly picked. But hey who am I to judge someone who believes a method with a extremely low success rate is superior to a method with a much higher success rate. It is his choice and it allows other men to have plenty more success. So I guess I should encourage him and others like him. That way I can have more females to work with.

I am glad he has his pride. After all, if you avoid rejection you never get rejected. However, at the same time you never learn to coup with rejection and rejection controls your life. However, like I said in the time he spent trying to figure out if she was single. He could have met at least one or two other females to try and seduce. Instead he wasted all his time making sure he would not be rejected.

That is just lame. You honestly think that Duff has been seducing women into a state of delirium and then leaving them so that they are ripe for the picking for the next guy that comes along? Really? Do you secretly think all women are idiots, slaves to their emotions without the means to making a logical decision?

Well... lets see, back when I was... 20 I watched my 25 year old brother hit on a girl he talked to her was getting a lot of good responses. He leaves to go to the bathroom and my younger brother, who is 19. Goes up to the same girl and continues flirting and ends up taking the girl home.

Truth of the matter is that females have different attraction buttons than males. Sure previous females could have been interested in duff, but since he was taking his sweet time. Well they are already excited/ready to date him. Then they meet another male. Who pushes all the buttons and builds her attraction and asks her out. Now she has a choice, wait for the guy who might flake or go for the guy who has just asked her out. For females attraction is transferable. I have seen it in action. However, true some females can control themselves. Just like some males can force themselves to be attracted to uglier females.

To make your own points and opinions seem valid, you don't hesitate to put words into people's mouths, as well as making up your own examples as to why you must be right and why Duff is wrong.
Just because YOU would do something a certain way, doesn't mean everyone else should.

Duff - ignore what he tells you and please consider a woman's point of view here. You did fine - Im a woman and wouldnt consider a guy checking me out of FB, before he asked me out, to be stalking me or fixated on me. No one says you have to date first and ask questions later. In fact, I think it would be common for a guy who is shy to check out a woman on FB or similar sites before going as far as putting your neck out and asking a woman out.

And one final note...

But hey who am I to judge someone who believes a method with a extremely low success rate is superior to a method with a much higher success rate. It is his choice and it allows other men to have plenty more success. So I guess I should encourage him and others like him. That way I can have more females to work with.

Which PUA manual have you been reading?

 

[AFrozenSoul]

AFrozenSoul

Truth is it takes a moment’s glance to see a ring on a wedding finger or 5 minutes to check a facebook status. Its no guarantee either way as to someone's availability but if its there in black and white well you know they aren't available and if at that point you don't want to try chatting up a woman who is spoken for then all credit to him. I mean I don't see that quick additional check being the reason for lack of success; it’s not a wholly flawed method. So really we're just disagreeing on whether it’s worth making that check, which is hardly hear or there really. Beyond that putting off asking for weeks for no good reason is of course not going to help but that’s not so much the issue we're discussing, just whether its worth checking beforehand as to her availability. Everyone's a bit different how they approach it. It just seems such a non issue to condemn the guys approach really.

Regards your brothers, well you can't prove either way of course but I reckon your younger brother would have taken that girl home regardless of whether your older brother had been chatting her up first. I think you'd have to consider yourself a bit of a lothario to be able to whip a woman up into a frenzy of excitment through flirting so that the next guy that comes a long simply has to step up to be pounced upon.

True it takes 5 minutes to check facebook. Oh yeah, it also takes a trip home. It can take more time to get to the point of asking a girl. However, it can take 10 seconds to get shot down. It can also take 45 minutes to learn the girl just wants a drink. However, you can also speak to several girls and get several concrete answers. As where if you take duff's method. You take at minimum 24 hours to land in the gray.

Yes the psychopath recovering alcoholic is better with girls. I know my brothers track record. Like how the older one slept with the younger one's prom date on the younger one's prom night. The older one is the better ladies man overall though.

To make your own points and opinions seem valid, you don't hesitate to put words into people's mouths, as well as making up your own examples as to why you must be right and why Duff is wrong.
Just because YOU would do something a certain way, doesn't mean everyone else should.

-_-... all because you did not answer the question that was asked. I know if I asked again you would not answer.

Which PUA manual have you been reading?

Same one I have always read. However, that is not just a PUA thing. The farmer who uses a plow will be able to grow more food. The farmer who just uses a hoe can come up with any number of reasons why his or her method is better. At the end of the day the farmer with the hoe will make a choice. Work much harder to make more food or settle with less food. Then there is the choice to suck it up and buy a plow. However, it is your choice to work harder. I prefer to work smarter.

 

[duff]

I have no problems looking at facebook, that's the whole point of it.

It was only when I found some information about her that I could check up. Maybe the 'Uncle Mike' she mentioned to her Daughter isn't her husband ? (it was 6 months ago as well - maybe they have split up !)

I will soon find out when I go in next. Remember it is her who is the chatty one. Last time I got all shy and awkard and decided that I wouldn't talk much and we ended up talking for 10 minutes. There is going to be a Part 2 on that conversation. She looks about 15 years younger than she is. I will mention that ! lol !

 

[The Good Citizen]

Quote: AFrozenSoul:too drunk to cut and paste thread using my IPhone...

"True it takes 5 minutes to check facebook. Oh yeah, it also takes a trip home. It can take more time to get to the point of asking a girl. However, it can take 10 seconds to get shot down. It can also take 45 minutes to learn the girl just wants a drink. However, you can also speak to several girls and get several concrete answers. As where if you take duff's method. You take at minimum 24 hours to land in the gray."

It also takes Duff maybe 2 or 3 trips to the shop to realise he likes the woman and considers asking her out. Or are you one of those guys who on walking into a shop for the first time ..."I'll take two photo frames and your phone number please sugar.." kind of guys. If so.. I doff my cap to you sir.

Ah it's new years eve, Eve...AFrozenSoul..Duff, let's kill this petulance and wish each other a wonderfully full 2013, bringing mysterious new suitors who says yes to your advances, whatever your methods. I'm off to drink more wine and toast you all. Good will to you all! *sozzled*

 

[duff]

I've been in the shop about 10 times but I hardly noticed her at first. It's only when our conversations have got longer that my attraction has developed. This has been super quick for me. It used to take me months and months to do anything or even consider it.