Is being shy harder for a guy or girl

[Sarah_Lbnz]

ITT: Delusional people.

Pretty much.

*enjoyin' my popcorn*

 

[VanillaCreme]

Gotta love the stat-trolls.

 

[LeaningIntoTheMuse]

Shyness is really an acceptable and understandable trait. After all, most people are shy, to some degree.

 

[perfanoff]

According to my experience, cats have it the worst.

 

[Reverie]

Are you really going to decide that based on genitals? o__0

---

According to my experience, cats have it the worst.

This is SO TRUE!!1 XD

---

.....Are you really going to decide that based on genitals? o__0

 

[ardour]

Well obviously it's a bigger deal for men, since we're expected to initiate, display confidence and carry the conversation, at least in the early dating / relationship phase.

 

[Grackle]

Guys will think guys have it tougher, obviously.
I think some 'people' have it rougher then others since there varying degrees of shyness.

 

[GoingInsane]

Being shy in 'looking for relationship' terms is definitely harder for guys for the reasons already stated. Me personally, I'm one of those guys who doesn't open up until I know the person well enough. In other words I find it impossible to get women to like and get to know me because they assume I'm the dull and boring type initially and don't give me the chance. Whats more i'm painfully nervous around women who I find fairly attractive when I first meet them and so it makes things worst.

Women want a confident guy who can hold a conversation and make them laugh, some guys naturally can not do this to start with so they miss out. Unless of course you are rich. You might attract the wrong types but its got to still be better than not getting any attention at all isn't it? I think so. But for men it's different we are not looking for confidence in women. It's more about what's on show. That's the difference. Shy women therefore do not lose out to finding love.

 

[ardour]

But for men it's different we are not looking for confidence in women. It's more about what's on show. That's the difference. Shy women therefore do not lose out to finding love.

Thanks for re-enforcing negatives stereotypes about men.

 

[EveWasFramed]

Women want a confident guy who can hold a conversation and make them laugh, some guys naturally can not do this to start with so they miss out. Unless of course you are rich. You might attract the wrong types but its got to still be better than not getting any attention at all isn't it? I think so. But for men it's different we are not looking for confidence in women. It's more about what's on show. That's the difference. Shy women therefore do not lose out to finding love.

Could you possibly voice that stereotype a little louder? I don't know if everyone heard you or not.

*agrees with ardour*

 

[GoingInsane]

But for men it's different we are not looking for confidence in women. It's more about what's on show. That's the difference. Shy women therefore do not lose out to finding love.

Thanks for re-enforcing negatives stereotypes about men.

Sorry mate but if you are trying to say men do not choose looks over personality at the very start then you are a liar. You don't even need to pretend otherwise, its just pure fact. Any man who disagrees is lying. Women are looking for confidence (maybe looks play a part also) but men are more drawn by appearance ONLY at the beginning (this is what I meant by "on show" let me clarify)

 

[Batman55]

Sorry mate but if you are trying to say men do not choose looks over personality at the very start then you are a liar.

Some men look for a good personality at the very start, with looks coming in second.

For me it is more important that a woman keeps her pride in check--arrogance will kill everything for me anyway, so it's better I know the ins-and-outs of her outlook from the very beginning. Being kind and caring is important, too, of course.

 

[The Underdog]

Sorry mate but if you are trying to say men do not choose looks over personality at the very start then you are a liar. You don't even need to pretend otherwise, its just pure fact. Any man who disagrees is lying. Women are looking for confidence (maybe looks play a part also) but men are more drawn by appearance ONLY at the beginning (this is what I meant by "on show" let me clarify)

Well, I don't identify with gender, so perhaps I'm not the best person to refute this, but I feel you're wrong. I've seen heaps of men with women that make you wonder, then there's the saying "if you want to be happy for life . . . ". You get it. In my experience, women are the ones that seek things like looks and livelihood. Not saying this is right or wrong, as everything can be explained from a biological perspective. I'm simply correcting you.

Forgot the second part. Sure, a nice-looking lady is nothing to complain about. No denying that. But the personality is what gets me. I think I'm the only one who can be sexually or romantically attracted to someone because of their personality, because of what makes them, them. So, if her personality is ugly, it'll kill it for me. It doesn't matter what she looks like or how beautiful she is by society's standards; they're not me. They won't be stuck with the horrid personality should we become an item. Sex is a small part of a relationship in terms of time spent doing it. Most of a couple's time will be spent living life. You know, working, using Facebook, playing video games, eating, showering. So after the nine minutes of pleasure ends, you'll get bored if you have nothing to talk about. You'll become miserable if you both don't click.

 

[Sci-Fi]

But for men it's different we are not looking for confidence in women. It's more about what's on show. That's the difference. Shy women therefore do not lose out to finding love.

Thanks for re-enforcing negatives stereotypes about men.

Sorry mate but if you are trying to say men do not choose looks over personality at the very start then you are a liar. You don't even need to pretend otherwise, its just pure fact. Any man who disagrees is lying. Women are looking for confidence (maybe looks play a part also) but men are more drawn by appearance ONLY at the beginning (this is what I meant by "on show" let me clarify)

Sorry mate but if you are trying to say men do not choose looks over personality at the very start then you are a liar. You don't even need to pretend otherwise, its just pure fact. Any man who disagrees is lying. Women are looking for confidence (maybe looks play a part also) but men are more drawn by appearance ONLY at the beginning (this is what I meant by "on show" let me clarify)

Well, I don't identify with gender, so perhaps I'm not the best person to refute this, but I feel you're wrong. I've seen heaps of men with women that make you wonder, then there's the saying "if you want to be happy for life . . . ". You get it. In my experience, women are the ones that seek things like looks and livelihood. Not saying this is right or wrong, as everything can be explained from a biological perspective. I'm simply correcting you.

What? Okay non of this "you're a liar" or telling someone they are wrong junk. We won't have that kind of behaviour. All of that is non gender specific, BOTH men and women do that, and there are BOTH that do not.

 

[Solivagant]

I think I'm the only one who can be sexually or romantically attracted to someone because of their personality, because of what makes them, them.

You're definitely not the only one.

 

[Sterling]

Pansexual is what it is called I believe. ^

 

[The Underdog]

I think I'm the only one who can be sexually or romantically attracted to someone because of their personality, because of what makes them, them.

You're definitely not the only one.

Me being as weird and messed-in-the-head as I am, I'd have to disagree.

 

[ardour]

But for men it's different we are not looking for confidence in women. It's more about what's on show. That's the difference. Shy women therefore do not lose out to finding love.

Thanks for re-enforcing negatives stereotypes about men.

Sorry mate but if you are trying to say men do not choose looks over personality at the very start then you are a liar. You don't even need to pretend otherwise, its just pure fact. Any man who disagrees is lying. Women are looking for confidence (maybe looks play a part also) but men are more drawn by appearance ONLY at the beginning (this is what I meant by "on show" let me clarify)

It's normal to be drawn by appearance when you know little else about the person, but you imply that men would pursue relationships (beyond the initiating) based purely on what a woman looks like.

 

[WallflowerGirl83]

I believe men it's a lot harder for those who are shy. I'm shy and I've always been shy most of my whole life. Online however I'm behind a computer so I'm a little less shy since nobody can see who I am. In person though, I'm very quiet and shy. Men who are shy, it takes a lot longer for them to approach woman and they're afraid of rejection and wondering how the woman will react if they start off a conversation with them. Believe they have a lot of pressure on them, cause most woman wait for the men to approach them so I think it makes it a lot harder for the men in any case. This is however is just my opinion.