Is there someone in your past you wish you had shown interest in?

[Azariah]

When I was in 7th grade there was this girl who lived down across the street. She seemed nice and simple. I remember us both walking in the rain to our houses. Maybe my life could be a whole lot different now if I had shown interest.
There are many others now that I really think about it.
Some how in retrospect they seem interesting. But at that time it wouldn't even cross my mind to make contact.

I wonder if it will be the same looking back ten years from now.

 

[sorandom5454]

Yeah I can relate.

There was a girl in my teens (neighbour) that was a few years older and came onto me pretty strongly a few times. But I was insecure and a bit childish so I never responded to it, we remained friends for some time until she moved. The reason I think back to this is because she is the only one who genuinely has been coming onto me and that seemed to like me for who I am, + she was a nice girl and she married and got kids a few years ago. So it's like, sometimes I think what if we had gotten on, maybe I would have been married by now and not this lonely.

But it would probably never have worked out anyway. I still feel way too young to be married, much less have childrens so maybe just that reason would have been enough to separate us if we had gotten on.

 

[JasonM]

No, living in the past will only cause grief and regret...

...that and I have a horrible memory so I am not left with the burden of...what was I just saying?

Oh look! Butterfly.

 

[LonelyInAtl]

I was talking to a good friend on FB and I don't remember how we got on the subject, but I admitted to her that I wanted to ask her out in HS but was too shy. She replied back that she wished I had and didn't I notice how she always found an excuse to hang around me and stuff like that?

Then in college, I went to get my hair cut at a salon near the Ga Tech campus. This really cute semi-punk girl cut my hair and we were chatting it up big time. When I left, she smiled and said "call me when you're ready to come back or any other thing" as she wrote her name and HOME phone on their business card. ARRRRGH....I was to blind to see that was an obvious invitation.

Hindsight is 20/20.

 

[Somethingmissing]

Yes. In fact I'm friends with them and we both admit we have feelings for each other but can't do anything about it. If only....

 

[Veruca]

Absolutely. But thinking about it makes me sad, so I try not to.

 

[Sci-Fi]

Yep, think about the same thing every so often. But what's past is past, can't go back and change it now, only live in the now and forge ahead the future.

 

[perfanoff]

No, living in the past will only cause grief and regret...

...that and I have a horrible memory so I am not left with the burden of...what was I just saying?

Oh look! Butterfly.

^ quoted for truth!

 

[ThisSideOfTheRainbow]

When I was a teenager, I was head over heels for the girl next door. We were in the same grade. I lived next to her for three years, and never said a thing to her about it. In fact, I was too shy to even talk to her.

 

[FlyingPlatypus]

Yes, lots of missed opportunities. I'm just amazed at how stupid I was. Or maybe ignorant is a better word.

 

[Gutted]

I can think of one person of whom I showed interest in, but I feel as if I could have acted more. Back in 2010, this Girl I'd known for years appeared to like me. But I was so shy back then. We kissed a few times which I liked very much. But it never turned into anything more. However I know that had I been less shy, we'd have gone out for sure. We almost did at the time but I was too nice for my own good

 

[maybelazy]

Two stand out for me.

In second year of college, I lived in shared accommodation. A new girl joined and I got to know her a bit. We got on very well and I ended up falling for her. She was smart, fashionable, cynical, good fun, well read and pretty. She was so impressive and I though the world of her. At the very end of the year I told her how I felt. She listened but explained that she didn't have feelings for me. I sent her a text after we met but she never responded. I think she was trying to do me a favor by breaking off all contact but it hurt a lot. It really distracted me from my studies and I failed one of my exams. Then I ended up working in a crappy summer job just so I could stay in the same city we studied in. I was miserable and very lonely. It destroyed what little confidence I had and it took a long time for me to approach another girl again.

Fast forward two years later to my last year in college. I meet a girl who's the polar opposite of girl 1. She's really earnest and uncool, she's not fashionable, very eager. She was a bit crazy in a sweet kind of way. She ended up having a successful career in charities, which kinda tells you a lot about her. And I feel for her too. I was so scared of ruining my finals that I never did anything about it.

I found out afterwards from a mutual friend that she wondered why I never asked her out. I still think of her to this day.

It's very hard to know what to do when you have a crush on someone. These things aren't easy anyway but for shy people I think they are a lot worse.

They offer us so much that we crave more than everyone else, validation, companionship, acceptance, understanding etc. And we need that stuff more than other people. And people call us needy for that, and think that we are weak.

 

[Sigma]

Some japanese friends of my parents moved from Japan -> UK -> Holland(here) a long time ago.
I met their daughter when I was about 3 years old (and she was 5) and even though she only spoke bits of english/japanese and I dutch we became friends.
Since we couldn't talk for a long time we eventually developed this game where she would point at some object in the environment, let's say a tree, and name it in english, then I would do the same in dutch and we would move on to the next object.
Like that we taught eachother our own language, I think I could watch english TV without subtitles when I was around 9 years old.
Because she lived 3 houses away we were together pretty much every day, we even celebrated our birthdays together because they were only 2 days apart, but this also meant we developed more of a brother/sister relationship rather than friend/friend, which made me deny the feelings I had for her when I grew older.
She moved back to Japan about a year ago, not a day has gone by on which I haven't wondered what would have happened if I accepted those feelings (and maybe, just maybe if she shared them)

 

[Tealeaf]

I don't think much about it anymore, but I did miss out once because I waited too long to speak up. We've been close friends for years and his girlfriend is an awesome lady, but yeah. If I'd spoken up just a few weeks sooner, I'd be the one with a dream relationship. The day he came to tell me about the new girl he was crazy about was the day I'd been planning to confess.

 

[blackdot]

I knew someone perfect for me in 11th grade who wanted to be with me. Unfortunately I was not ready to date at that time.

I wish I had met her in my mid-30's when I was finally ready to learn to date.

 

[el Jay]

Not really. There's lots of people I've crushed on or wanted to ask out, but I always chickened out. But then I learned later that they had a boyfriend already, and had at the time I was going to ask, so I ended up learning that if there's someone I'm interested in, she already has someone and I shouldn't even bother.

That lesson has proved very true for everyone I've been interested in since learning it.

 

[theraab]

I've posted this story before, but it seems appropriate under this heading too:

When I was a freshman in college, I had a couple classes with this very beautiful girl. We became friends, but I assumed she was out of my league - we got along well, so I was fine just being her friend. One weekend her parents were out of town so she invited me over to watch a movie; after the movie was done she asked me if I wanted to play strip poker - we played until we were both down to our underwear; she then said "let's have a pillow fight"...and at no point when she is standing in her lingerie, playfully batting me with a pillow does it occur to me that she wants to be anything more than friends. (It was almost 2 years later before it occurred to me that she was hitting on me).

So, yes, I often wonder what could have been.

 

[edamame721]

Sometimes I wonder, especially during times when I wish I had someone to be my mutual support. But then I remember the reason I didn't show interest in them was because I wasn't interested in them, or they were playing mind games. I can't imagine getting into a relationship with someone and dealing with all the drama that causes while being unable to love them.

 

[Azariah]

Thanks for the responses. Read them all!

 

[Moe'sTavern]

Yea, for me I was in 10th grade and we were in the same science class. Very smart and pretty. We talked every now and then during school but I never considered asking her out. Wish I did. Anyway, now she works in neuroscience and is into kickboxing I believe.