I've never noticed how annoying my sister is

[Animelover10102]

So, for whatever reason, I'm not allowed to say anything about myself around my family members, because it's all about them and they basically don't care.

Especially with my sister now, since she 'met' someone online. Now, she is always on her phone (she absolutely hated when people did this), and is always talking about him. Mind you, they are not in a relationship yet.

But when I talk about how I want to see a boy I haven't talked with in almost 3 years because I still like him, she makes fun of me, ignores me, or gets angry. Like, ok, I guess my feelings don't matter.

My sister is also annoyingly naive for someone who claims they are super smart. Whenever the subject of my mom's dating life comes up, She is always like, "why stay in a relationship? Why not be single?". She doesn't understand because she has NEVER been in a relationship before. I have been in one, and I can see why my mom stays in relationships. It annoys me so much it makes me angry.

She claims she is so smart, but most of the stuff she doesn't understand because A) she's never experienced it, or B) she doesn't research it.

She thinks she is so cool because she tells people "I've never been in a relationship because I think they are tedious.

She also doesn't understand how people keep relapsing into drugs. It's not even that hard to understand! It's because they've done it for most of their life, and it's addictive.

She also makes fun of me because I have celebrity crushes on people like Benedict Cumberbatch, Tom Hiddleston, and Ronan Parke. (Look them up, you'll see why I have crushes on them; They are amazing people, inside and out) Like, I'm not allowed to be a normal person? Ok then.

 

[Ymir]

I don't think you need to experience things to know about them, but definitely your sister sounds deeply annoying. Maybe you should try to get some distance from her if you wouldn't like confronting her about her behavior.

 

[Animelover10102]

I don't think you need to experience things to know about them, but definitely your sister sounds deeply annoying. Maybe you should try to get some distance from her if you wouldn't like confronting her about her behavior.

I mean to understand it better.

And unfortunately, I am not old enough to move out, and she won't move out either, and she is 19...so idk..

 

[ladyforsaken]

I don't think you can change her behaviour or how she thinks by the sounds of it. So best to change how it affects you. It doesn't have to bother you, you can learn not to care what she thinks or what she says. I had to do this with my siblings myself, to save myself from a lot of hurt. Just not worth it, feeling all that for people who don't really care, even if they're family. I'm sorry you are going through this though. :/

 

[Ymir]

Yeah, when I said get some distance, I didn't mean "move out". I meant what LadyF said, distance yourself emotionally from the situation. Don't share your thoughts about that boy with her, and don't let her bother you.

 

[kamya]

My little brother ended up being one of the most ungrateful people I've ever known. He'd also get upset really easily and instead of confronting his issues he would just run off and drive away instead of opening up to anyone. One day, right before my parents moved a few thousand miles away, we got into an argument. He went to go drive off again and I started teasing him about always running away from the problem. He ran right back up to me and got in my face. I punched him in the mouth. He ran off. We didn't talk for 6 months. Since then we have the best relationship and we get along great. I actually like spending time with him and he seems to have grown up a lot, I guess from just being out on his own.

Anyways...have you tried punching her in the mouth?

 

[lifestream]

Hey animelover.

I know a girl who, from the sound of her, is very much like your sister.

From my observations, I think the issue is the impudence and immaturity of youth coupled with pronounced self-obsession and, in my own case, pure indifference to the suffering and troubles of other people. I'll give you an example: a few years ago, both of my parents were suffering terribly with cancer and a lot of the day-to-day responsibilities of running the household fell on me. I was not in a good place emotionally or mentally, so naturally I confided in this girl, who we'll call "Jane", thinking that despite her issues (bragging about her imagined talents/intelligence, her busy social life, how all the boys liked her - general cliché narcissistic behaviour), she would be supportive. Boy, was I wrong... She gave me maybe five minutes to talk about my feelings about how my parents were dying a little bit each day before she forced the subject back onto her latest relationship, what she had for breakfast, her feelings about about the latest Beyoncé song, while I just sat there in a state of existential horror. The next time I saw Jane after that night she'd promptly "forgotten" about my parents and it was all about her, as usual. Seeing how she reacted when I was in pain and turmoil and how she dealt with it after the fact showed me that there was something deeply, dreadfully wrong with Jane, so I promptly left the friendship and cut off all contact with her. Thankfully, both of my parents survived and are still with us to this day, but the same can't be said of my friendship with Jane. It was maybe eighteen months before I saw her again. Everything that had destroyed our friendship seemed to have only become more prominent and she had so obviously failed to grasp why I had cut off all communication with her (she had assumed that it was because I was depressed). And she's only gotten worse with time.

So there you go, animelover. Obviously our situations are very different, but to this day if I meet someone who shows any sign of what I've come to think of as "Jane's Syndrome", I generally keep very far away from them. I know she's your sister, but until she gets her head deflated it might be best to interact with her only when absolutely necessary... Or you could take kamya's very pertinent advice and punch her in the mouth. Wish I had punched Jane in the mouth!