G
Guest
Guest
I just want to vent. I don't have anyone I feel comfortable talking to, and I need to get some things off my chest. I'm 25 and have never been in a serious relationship, ever. Hell, not even anything that qualifies as a "relationship," period. I've been on a few quasi-dates (more like friendly meals), and that's about it. Never been kissed, much less gone any farther than that. I'm also somewhat gender-confused... I dunno if it's a cause or a result of my romantic shyness.
It really makes me feel rotten when I think about it. I've missed out on so much. I wish I were just "normal."
Worst of all, it feels like there's little hope for the future. I wouldn't call myself suicidal, but I'd be lying if I said the thought hasn't crossed my mind. The main thing keeping me going is that I don't want to hurt my family. They obviously love and respect me, although I've built up such a distance between me and other people that I don't feel comfortable talking to even them.
Ever see a movie that gets off to a really promising start, then kind of fizzles away, but you keep on watching anyway, not due to any real interest but more out of an idle curiosity to see if it can redeem itself? That's the story of my life.
Anyway, thanks for letting me vent. I've tried keeping a diary occasionally in the past, but somehow it seems a lot more cathartic when I know that someone, somewhere out there is reading. Even if it's a thousand miles away.
It really makes me feel rotten when I think about it. I've missed out on so much. I wish I were just "normal."
Worst of all, it feels like there's little hope for the future. I wouldn't call myself suicidal, but I'd be lying if I said the thought hasn't crossed my mind. The main thing keeping me going is that I don't want to hurt my family. They obviously love and respect me, although I've built up such a distance between me and other people that I don't feel comfortable talking to even them.
Ever see a movie that gets off to a really promising start, then kind of fizzles away, but you keep on watching anyway, not due to any real interest but more out of an idle curiosity to see if it can redeem itself? That's the story of my life.
Anyway, thanks for letting me vent. I've tried keeping a diary occasionally in the past, but somehow it seems a lot more cathartic when I know that someone, somewhere out there is reading. Even if it's a thousand miles away.