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- Mar 10, 2012
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So in my renewed efforts to have conversations and be more outgoing I've found I have developed a lot of bad habits and returned to habits that I learned to break when I was younger. Some examples of these are:
-Not saying hello or goodbye or other formalities. I walk up, start asking questions and when the conversation dies I walk away. I know it's awkward but I can't seem to tell when I'm doing it.
-My replies are either extremely short or overly longwinded. I can't seem to find a middle ground.
-Using words that are not really understood. I like to be precise in my language and don't want to feel like I'm dumbing down my speech for the benefit of others, but I've been told it makes people feel like they're stupid.
-Either being far too open for comfort, or being far too secretive. Again, I can't seem to find the sweet spot.
-Looking around constantly. People keep accusing me of not paying attention to them even though I am.
The real problem for me right now is how can I know when I'm doing these things, and not just recognize them after the fact? How can I become more self-aware without becoming self conscious?
Have any of you found yourselves in a similar situation and improved your skills? Do any of you currently find yourself having any of these issues? Does anyone have any suggestions for books or other resources?
-Not saying hello or goodbye or other formalities. I walk up, start asking questions and when the conversation dies I walk away. I know it's awkward but I can't seem to tell when I'm doing it.
-My replies are either extremely short or overly longwinded. I can't seem to find a middle ground.
-Using words that are not really understood. I like to be precise in my language and don't want to feel like I'm dumbing down my speech for the benefit of others, but I've been told it makes people feel like they're stupid.
-Either being far too open for comfort, or being far too secretive. Again, I can't seem to find the sweet spot.
-Looking around constantly. People keep accusing me of not paying attention to them even though I am.
The real problem for me right now is how can I know when I'm doing these things, and not just recognize them after the fact? How can I become more self-aware without becoming self conscious?
Have any of you found yourselves in a similar situation and improved your skills? Do any of you currently find yourself having any of these issues? Does anyone have any suggestions for books or other resources?