loneliest point in my life

[SighX99]

right now i feel im at the loneliest point in my life. no more good friends, only fake friends. couldnt sleep at night, thinking about how all my friends just somehow fade away, and/or have bad blood. not even my fault. things always happen at the worst timing possible. im regretting everything ive done now, even the good things. i have insomnia i stay up all night thinking how lonely i really am. and sleep through most of day time because i have nothing to do, no friends calling me to do stuff, they are always using me anyways. i have no engergy to pursuit friends. im scared everytime i find a good genuine friend they always end up going away or with better friends (then scheme against me in someway) then ill just hate myself. lifes great. i really dont even know what to do anymore... i just want someone to at least listen. no one knows how i feel, no one. im a good person, never fresia people over, listen to people, care about connections, but it seems that it doesnt work out with most people. everyday i wake up hating myself.

being lonely is ok right? i dont know... i thought it was, but it really isnt and i really dont kno what to do...

 

[Robin]

If You want someone to listen, try and pop in to the chat-room at around 6PM GMT and there probably will be a bunch of people there just waiting for someone like You to get crackin'.

 

[Bluey]

Being lonely is not OK and is one of the worst feelings ever. It makes you feel unwonted and unloved.

You have been rather broad in your post there mate. Not said anything that persefec just kinder general stuff witch can make it difficult to reply back to.

But if your a good person and I am sure you are then ppl can take advantage of that. Now you have two choosers here. The fist being that you too become a using ******* and just be friend ppl to get what you can get out off them. Or you just keep trying to plod on doing your own thing in the hope and search to meet nicer ppl then you have done in the past.

If you take the fist one then you have to live with your conscience and know that you well never have a real friend. Also ppl, good ppl well see tho this eventually. And there are good ppl out there. You just have to fined one another. PPL that use and abuse do allows come unstuck eventually.

If you take the second opsone (this like a game qwis lol) Well then eventually you may meet a nice person. Be it a friend or GF. PPL do and well see you for what you are eventually. You just have to have the stretch to be who you are and not feel ashamed of it. Be stronger nuff to not take crap from ppl but to be a friend and to give ppl the benefit of the doubt and sooner are later you well have ppl respect you for it and who are prepared to put them out for you. If nothing else you well have your pride in tacked which is a lot moor than a lot off ppl can say and that is something that can not be Burt.

ps sorry about the bad grammar there. Hope you understand what I was trying to say

 

[helen]

oh, hunny, i hope things get better for you! i know platitudes arent very helpful, but it does seem like what you're talking about is temporal. if theres bad blood between your friends, phone them up and try to make it up! i guess it can be a little scary, but if theyre your friends i'm sure you'll make it up. people have so much going on their lives its easy to lose touch, and they probably dont even realise how bad you're feeling. i'm sure that bluey and robin would agree that people on here are always happy to listen, so thats a start if nothing else!

 

[LilyS]

I know how you feel. I have only one friend, i guess she's a good friend. Or, she has been a good friend. Nowadays we see each other maybe once a month. She has someone in her life and now she has no more time for me. We still text each other several times a week, but it's almost always something very general. I have told her how i feel, mostly about my loneliness and sometimes really dark thoughts. Trying to tell her that company would be appreciated etc. A little while ago i got some rude answers from her. She told me that i'm making this stuff up, that it's only in my imagination. She has also told me to "just think about something else" than my loneliness. So when she now asks how am i doing, i tell her that i'm ok, since she's clearly fed up with me.

I once told my mom about feeling lonely and she just said i should have a new hobby where i could meet ppl, but i dosn't work like that with me. I've never made friends easily 'cause i'm shy and lack confidence. When i first started university, i thought that it would be a turning point, meeting new ppl and all that. Yeah, didn't really work. The few girls i hung around with for a while were not my kinda ppl. All they seemed ever talk about were their bf's or something and i had nothing in common with them.

Now i feel like i'm in a dead end. I don't have the energy to do anything, i could just sleep. And at the same time i have mild insomnia. My brain just won't stop. And the loneliness is already the worst in the night. Even if the day's been somewhat ok, the minute you're about to go to bed, the loneliness creeps in. It's not even about sleeping alone (although, i've considered getting a smaller bed). Sometimes i can go on for days without speaking to anybody. And a few years ago i enjoyed being alone. But still, i had somebody who was concerned about me. Now i keep thinking if something happened to me, nobody would miss me for days...

Sorry Sigh, i don't think i was really any help. Looks like i just needed to get that all out of me.
Anyway, i wish all the good for you and keep posting. I've only just discovered this site and it already feels like something i can fit in. It's good to know that there are other ppl like us, we're all here for the same reason. And here we have tons of ppl who are willing to listen and share their thoughts, me included.

Lily

 

[lonelydude]

right now i feel im at the loneliest point in my life. no more good friends, only fake friends. couldnt sleep at night, thinking about how all my friends just somehow fade away, and/or have bad blood. not even my fault. things always happen at the worst timing possible. im regretting everything ive done now, even the good things. i have insomnia i stay up all night thinking how lonely i really am. and sleep through most of day time because i have nothing to do, no friends calling me to do stuff, they are always using me anyways. i have no engergy to pursuit friends. im scared everytime i find a good genuine friend they always end up going away or with better friends (then scheme against me in someway) then ill just hate myself. lifes great. i really dont even know what to do anymore... i just want someone to at least listen. no one knows how i feel, no one. im a good person, never fresia people over, listen to people, care about connections, but it seems that it doesnt work out with most people. everyday i wake up hating myself.

being lonely is ok right? i dont know... i thought it was, but it really isnt and i really dont kno what to do...

hello,
I can really feel what ur going through. Heck most ppl on this forum are going through this same shitty feeling , so dont feel too lonely out there , where all here with you side by side . Today i realized that i really have no life/friends. Every1 is going to places doing stuff several times a week, and me , well the last time i got out of the house for a social gathering was like 6 months ago. its not like i DONT WANT TO GO, hell some of the ppl in my school think im some kinda freakin extrovert FOR SOME REASON, LOL, they couldnt be more wrong.

How about making more friends? Are u currently in college? or are u working? Youve got to adapt to you surroudings to make life work for you. IM not saying that you change WHO YOU ARE , im just saying change your outlook a lil bit and when you think about making friends, dont exclude anyone thinking like he/she is ugly/dumb/rich snob/arrogant etc. Who knows, the person you think someone is on the outside COULD BE THE EXACT OPPOSITE of what you think he/she was, in a way thats how society is thinking about alot of us.

Were all here for you, vent out some more, pm somebody if u dont feel comfortable on the forum , use the chat, Get it out so you can Get if fixed!

 

[jenn]

i have insomnia i stay up all night thinking how lonely i really am. and sleep through most of day time because i have nothing to do, no friends calling me to do stuff, they are always using me anyways.

i relate to what you are saying so much. usually the middle of the night is the loneliest time for me. i know it'll make me seem pathetic but i usually wrap a blanket around me to mimic an arm around me, and i lay there imagining someone is laying beside me, stroking my hair, telling me that i'm a wonderful girl, that they think i'm wonderful and that i dont' deserve this loneliness. i try to confront myself the best i can because i feel like there'll never be anyone there to listen, to hold me, to care. this pretending i do every night is all i will ever have. its so hard to sleep when this is always running through your head.

i know that this won't help you feel any less lonely at night but maybe its a comfort to know your not alone in feeling like this.

 

[jason evans]

A good point to start in digging yourself out is to think long and hard about what it is that you want from people. Think about what is behind those wants.

In subtle ways, we tend to build our own prisons of isolation.

I'm not saying that people don't fail us. They do all the time. But how you perceive it and how you approach them in the first place can be skewed by the hidden sources of your pain.

 

[Hijacc]

Some people just build up a wall to see who cares enough to tear it down.....

 

[lonelydude]

Some people just build up a wall to see who cares enough to tear it down.....

Very true, unless you reach out to ppl, ppl arnt gonna reach out to you, unless theyre the kinda of good friends that you see in movies (which dont exist in real life btw).

Sometimes we just wonder why were lonely, and really alot of the times its out of ur control. If ur in school, maybe the class ur in doesnt have ppl that suit ur interests, maybe you just want some time for urself. It doesnt really matter at all, dont stop trying, dont stop being urself. Just keep on going, keep ur heart beating, keep a positive attitude and luck will smile in ur favour eventually.

 

[Irishdoll]

I can understand how you're feeling. I too am without any real life friendship. I have not had a friend at all in over 11 years. My husband has been my only outlet. All I can offer is to think positive. There will be somebody out there who will find you interesting and funny and everything else it takes to have a great friend. It never happens overnight. We also tend to lose touch with people, or our tastes change as the years go and we get very busy and forget the things that are important to us. Try to make contact with some of your friends just to test the water. If they don't understand, then think about how close that friendship really was. Good luck to you and I'll be thinking good thoughtd for you.

 

[SighX99]

hopefully this is only temporal. i guess all i can do is keep on going like lonelydude said... ive always failed, but i need to kepp my head up. turning 21 today and spending most of the time by myself... lifes great.

 

[lonelydude]

Dont ever feel like a failure, dont ever count yourself out, never underestimate yourself. The minute you do that , uve lost everything. Hang in there, sometimes life changes things around you that you are unable to change or get over initially, but eventually you do.

What im doing to "fix" my life is take all the negative things out. You know, stuff that doesnt make u happy. This makes a very very large difference. Just try and stay focused on not letting anything disturb/rattle you, and eventually ull be rid of this dilemma. Trust me , its only temporal , it only gets permanent IF YOU LET IT TO BE! Stay happy, enjoy what you have , get rid of what you dont like. Everyone has bad times in their life, just think of this time as the bad time in ur life and that itll be over soon