lonely and scared

[miss daisy]

I am female and I will be 47 in October. I have one daughter and she married her soul mate on June 18'2011. I was married for the first time for 10 years(together for 12 years.) We have a newly wed daughter who is 25 years old. My second marriage will be 14 years in Sept (been together 17 years). I am disabled and live in constant pain. My best friend died on October 24,2010 with a second bout of cancer and she has had Chrons for many years-she was cancer free for 5 1/2 years and then she got blocked up and when they went to fix things they found cancer in her lungs,tummy,brain the cancer just took over and she died October 24 th 2010 Her husband and son and I layed in the bed with her while she took her last breath. Two years before in the year 2008 my brother died of cancer(the same kind as my bestest friend,) one month later my wonderful Mother-in-law died suddenly and 10 days after that my mom died from MS cancer and strokes. My husband is an alcoholic and was sober when I met him.(my first husband was a crack smoking cocain dealer My current husband has 2 duis and can not go ANYWHERE with stopping at several bars and I have no idea where he is or what or whom is doing. I refuse to drive for the time being and if I need for him to get me something from the store he brings the things I will not eat (he has been doing it right for 15 years) He left to go to the store and take his tux back--I have hardly got out of my chair(the wedding really took alot out of me) At the rehersal I did not eat-just was not hungry and at the wedding with almost 300 guests and the wedding party was 20 people--no time to eat-so he knew I was VERY hungry and yet it took over 5 hours for the food to get here and it was all wrong--dah same thing for 15 years. My sister died in a motorcycle accident years ago so for family I have my dad and step-mom, my step-sister(who is a total sister in everyway and her 4 kids are very important to me and I love them all and was even her coach. I have one friend that I can walk to her house but she works so I am alone all day and that gives you way to much time to think.I have another friend that lives kind of far but we try to get together on her day off--but sense I had some type of malfunction I was pulled over and the cop took me to my moms house and she brought me home and stayed and we decided that it is safer for the world if I wait to drive until I am sure it will be safe. I am lonely and scared and confused a depressed and really need a friend that has a similar story Thanks for reading my story and this is only paragraph one. Maybe I should write a book because there is a lot more then this maybe 10 more chapters. Thank you for reading my story and I hope there are alot of people that can relate and offer advice and most of all FRIENDSHIPS--I feel all alone in the huge world. I will go by the name Robin.

 

[evanescencefan91]

*hugs miss daisy* I'm so sorry that you've had to deal with so much loss i your life that must be very hard

but it sounds like you still have people left in your life who care a lot about you and that is important

writing is always good it gives you something to do and helps you to get things out of your system

I hope things get better

*hugs*

 

[Tino Tsutchie]

Hi Robin,

I'm sorry to hear your story. It does sound like you still have people that love and care about you. There's many people here that can offer their help and friendship!

 

[VanillaCreme]

*hugs* I certainly hope you feel better, even if just for a day. Not only do I know how it feels to be in constant pain, my mother - who is very close to your age - is also in constant pain. You're definitely not alone. I hope you feel welcomed here.

 

[alonewanderer]

Stick with it dame, you're obviously a tough woman and I respect that, even if you got to share it with us there are plenty that understand your anguish.

You're never truly alone...ever

 

[locdenkiopfd]

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*spam removal*

 

[missymessy]

*tres hug!* Like someone else said, with all that you've been/are going through, you're clearly a very strong woman.
There will be light at the end of it for someone with that much strength to go on
That said - I'm sorry that you've seen so much sorrow already.

I'm alone all day too, stuck in with disability, so if you ever need someone to talk to feel free to message.
x

 

[grainofrice24]

Sad story. Sorry about all the hurt.

It sounds like there are still people who care about you. That's important. The world can be too cruel sometimes. But I like to think that if you keep going, something will come along to make you glad you did.

All the best.

 

[canarini]

WHAT SHALL I SAY , APART FROM THE FACT I FEEL LONELY ALTHOUGH I AM IN A MARRIAGE. FOR THIS PERSON I LEFT MY COUNTRY AND MY FAMILY.. AND THE MARRIAGE IS NOT FUNCTIONING AT ALL.. I AM SAD AND LONELY. AND THE THING I WASNT LIKE THIS BEFORE... I WAS A HAPPY ENTHUSISTIC PERSON.. 8 YEARS OF PAIN ...

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SORRY I AM NEW IN THE FORUM AND I DONT KNOW HOW IT WORKS. I AM SO SORRY FOR YOU ..BUT MOST PEOPLE SAY YOU STILL Have people who care about you... keep going ...my friend