Left In The Cold
Member
- Joined
- Sep 6, 2013
- Messages
- 7
- Reaction score
- 0
Hi
I'm lonely & I hate this life.
No alarm bells, I'm not suicidal.
I've just turned 32 a week ago (no happy birthdays please), have a 9 year old son who I have on my days off so really I don't get a day off @ all. I work @ a dead end mill job doing 4x12hr shifts then get 4 days off all year round.
I find that I'm angry almost all of the time. Mostly @ myself for poor life choices & ongoing addictive tendencies.
10 years ago I had heaps of friends, was singing in a popular local band & always had girls around me (which stupidly I over indulged in). Now I live 10kms out of town in a granny flat type place @ my mates parents house. It's cheap rent so that's a plus but I feel so detached from society. I spend my time riding my bike as often as i can, putting off jobs i need to do (laziness), eating unhealthily & playing Xbox.
I try to focus on the positive things in my life but honestly that just gets me angry as it always leads to the what ifs & what could've beens.
My last girlfriend went to stay with her parents for a few days, after us living together for a year. A week later she phoned & said we should go into town & pay some bills & the like. 20 mins after I pick her up she tells me she's going to move out. 4 years on I still don't know why. Although I know she wasn't the right girl for me it's extremely depressing & i've been living in a hole ever since
I just want to be comfortable in myself & not be by myself
Thanks for reading, skimming or whatever
I'm lonely & I hate this life.
No alarm bells, I'm not suicidal.
I've just turned 32 a week ago (no happy birthdays please), have a 9 year old son who I have on my days off so really I don't get a day off @ all. I work @ a dead end mill job doing 4x12hr shifts then get 4 days off all year round.
I find that I'm angry almost all of the time. Mostly @ myself for poor life choices & ongoing addictive tendencies.
10 years ago I had heaps of friends, was singing in a popular local band & always had girls around me (which stupidly I over indulged in). Now I live 10kms out of town in a granny flat type place @ my mates parents house. It's cheap rent so that's a plus but I feel so detached from society. I spend my time riding my bike as often as i can, putting off jobs i need to do (laziness), eating unhealthily & playing Xbox.
I try to focus on the positive things in my life but honestly that just gets me angry as it always leads to the what ifs & what could've beens.
My last girlfriend went to stay with her parents for a few days, after us living together for a year. A week later she phoned & said we should go into town & pay some bills & the like. 20 mins after I pick her up she tells me she's going to move out. 4 years on I still don't know why. Although I know she wasn't the right girl for me it's extremely depressing & i've been living in a hole ever since
I just want to be comfortable in myself & not be by myself
Thanks for reading, skimming or whatever