Almost 32 years old and living in the US. I dropped out of community college when I was 18 and then attempted to try the school thing again when I was 22 but dropped out because I lost focus and was bored. I've had numerous jobs but nothing I could really consider a career, 9 years later I have a highly skilled career but the pay is crap and the benefits are worse. I would really like to go back to school and finish this time but I keep doubting myself!
This next thing is really destroying me. I was married for a little over 2.5 years and we split up in September of '13. We had a great relationship but as soon as we moved in with each other/got married things went down hill. We both emotionally and mentally abused each other, typical name calling and telling each other we were worthless to each other. I was never good enough for her, everything I did around the house was wrong in her eyes, she always told me to get a different job(I don't know why she hated what I did so much...blue collar work), I gained a good 30 pounds and she would always say she wouldn't want me to crush her, our intimate life went down to nothing, her facebook friends were far too important than me, and my driving wasn't good enough for her. She would get pissed off if I talked to female friends but it was okay for her to go off and hang out with male friends. I accused her of cheating because she was always so secretive on her phone and she would get random texts and phone calls at random times of the night. She finally told me she was hanging out with a guy, but that he was gay and she would rant and rave about him in front of me. I helped her with so much, including her government papers to become legal here...I know I know red flag but I feel I wasn't used for this. After all is said and done, it's been 8 months since we've been separated. I've seen here maybe twice over those months but for a brief period of time, just so I can give her her mail.
I know I shouldn't but I really miss her and I definitely still love her even though we constantly use to hurt each other. I'm still struggling with this, everyday but my heart is telling me she has moved on
I know we'll never get back together, if we did I know my family and friends would never be in my life again.
I have maybe 4 or 5 friends but we never really do anything. I work 10 hours a day and then I call or text my buddies when I get off so we can do something and they never want to do anything so I just go back home and mope around and do absolutely nothing. I'd like to meet new people but I'm so awfully shy. I'm a very lonely and sad person. I feel like my life is going downhill and I have no soul anymore.
I've gone to numerous doctors, tried anti-depressants, talk to friends(they never take me serious), talk to my family but they always tell me to go see a doctor. I don't know what to do anymore. Is there a light at the end of the tunnel? Sorry for the long run on sentences.
This next thing is really destroying me. I was married for a little over 2.5 years and we split up in September of '13. We had a great relationship but as soon as we moved in with each other/got married things went down hill. We both emotionally and mentally abused each other, typical name calling and telling each other we were worthless to each other. I was never good enough for her, everything I did around the house was wrong in her eyes, she always told me to get a different job(I don't know why she hated what I did so much...blue collar work), I gained a good 30 pounds and she would always say she wouldn't want me to crush her, our intimate life went down to nothing, her facebook friends were far too important than me, and my driving wasn't good enough for her. She would get pissed off if I talked to female friends but it was okay for her to go off and hang out with male friends. I accused her of cheating because she was always so secretive on her phone and she would get random texts and phone calls at random times of the night. She finally told me she was hanging out with a guy, but that he was gay and she would rant and rave about him in front of me. I helped her with so much, including her government papers to become legal here...I know I know red flag but I feel I wasn't used for this. After all is said and done, it's been 8 months since we've been separated. I've seen here maybe twice over those months but for a brief period of time, just so I can give her her mail.
I know I shouldn't but I really miss her and I definitely still love her even though we constantly use to hurt each other. I'm still struggling with this, everyday but my heart is telling me she has moved on
I know we'll never get back together, if we did I know my family and friends would never be in my life again.I have maybe 4 or 5 friends but we never really do anything. I work 10 hours a day and then I call or text my buddies when I get off so we can do something and they never want to do anything so I just go back home and mope around and do absolutely nothing. I'd like to meet new people but I'm so awfully shy. I'm a very lonely and sad person. I feel like my life is going downhill and I have no soul anymore.
I've gone to numerous doctors, tried anti-depressants, talk to friends(they never take me serious), talk to my family but they always tell me to go see a doctor. I don't know what to do anymore. Is there a light at the end of the tunnel? Sorry for the long run on sentences.
