AFrozenSoul
Well-known member
@Ak5: In the case of tango yes. In the case of sex it only takes one willing and desiring side. Females cannot decide if they will get pregnant. They can just deal with it Afterwards.
Never had a relationship and never had sex
- Thread starter Jim78
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Help Support Loneliness, Depression & Relationship Forum:
AFrozenSoul said:
No, you did not read my reply correctly. It was HER that wanted all the sex, SHE did. Not him.
Ak5
Well-known member
I lol'ed.
The things she told me...more than I ever wanted to know about someone else sex life.
Ak5
Well-known member
Sci-Fi said:
I tell you about my sex life.
What sex life.
Ak5
Well-known member
Sci-Fi said:
Mine
AFrozenSoul
Well-known member
@Anten: Because you asked which woman, singluar, not women wronged me.
AFrozenSoul
Well-known member
@Anten: All I have encountered. Siblings, classmates, co-workers, any female. I have been a doormat since long before I adopted my current philosophy. All through my life. No provocation, no cynicism, nothing. They just knew I was garbage. So they treated me as such.
570rm47
Member
hey jim i envy your chance to live something that is really impossible i guess its very improbable to have a one and only love but your not imature you could actually do it you have grown out of those hormone and body change things that normally get the way of being able to work at something like that when we begin, i know this doesnt help you in anyway.
If its a question of getting laid you could always visit a woman of negotiable affections as long as you go somewhere a little professional its all on the up and up you can be honest and straight up discuss it and the like.
But me i guess im a bit of the hopeless romantic type and the one and only love would be for me if i could change the past
If its a question of getting laid you could always visit a woman of negotiable affections as long as you go somewhere a little professional its all on the up and up you can be honest and straight up discuss it and the like.
But me i guess im a bit of the hopeless romantic type and the one and only love would be for me if i could change the past
AFrozenSoul said:
This is getting off topic but if you allow women or only view them as seeing you as a doormat that is the only thing you will see. No alpha male bullshit, just stand your ground and learn to say no, have boundaries whether the person is male or female. Girls may have used me but I don't see myself as a victim because it was a two way street, give and take. Even if the girl was taking more than giving I only allow her to take so much.
AFrozenSoul
Well-known member
@Anten: That is a nice thought. However, women only associate with me when they have too. So I generally get trapped by sexual harassment threats and have to give more that is correct. Either that or women just want something. When I do not give in I get treated like trash. However, that is my curse. Women can just tell I am a genetic dead end. So instead of just being a typical guy, and taking it. I can spread hatred and misery at least then they have a legitimate reason to hate me.
somber_radiance
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In the same boat too...but I'm 10 years younger.
I'm not sure what advice I can give you. I think you shouldn't give up. They say you gotta try 100 times before you find one or two that will say yes (something along those lines). I think you should meet women with the idea that you'd like to be friends. No need to rush into it. I feel like with guys...you reach your prime at a later stage in life. A successful man just keeps growing more attractive.
I'm not sure what advice I can give you. I think you shouldn't give up. They say you gotta try 100 times before you find one or two that will say yes (something along those lines). I think you should meet women with the idea that you'd like to be friends. No need to rush into it. I feel like with guys...you reach your prime at a later stage in life. A successful man just keeps growing more attractive.
Jim78 said:I'm a new member so hello everyone.
Well the title pretty much sums my problem up. I've never had a girlfriend and have never had sex and the older I get the more insecure I fell about it. I feel like I'm missing out on some integral part of the human experience and it's getting me pretty down. I'm really shy around women and can only remember ever asking a couple out for a date and got turned down. I have fairly low self esteem and don't feel "good enough" and that I will just get rejected/hurt again. I think I'm a decent guy and women seem to like me but I struggle when it comes to relationships and sex. it's embarrasing being like this at my age (i'm 33) and I feel like such a loser.
All my friends are in relationships and I feel like I'm being left behind. I'm so lonely at the moment and am pretty depressed.
You revealed the root of your problem in your post. Like a dog can smell fresh meat, women can smell insecurity and celibacy. And they don't like it. The good news is that as a man, even at 33, you still have years ahead of yourself to improve your attractiveness.
My advice is to work on your shyness and low self-esteem. If you don't already, you should start exercising. I don't mean to bulk up and become macho man, but maybe just go for a jog once a day. Exercising is one of the most productive things you can do with your free time and it increases your testosterone levels (which should help a bit with your self esteem issues). You also need to work on your depression. See a psychiatrist and take pills if you have to. You need to fix yourself before women find you attractive.
Ak5
Well-known member
Okonkwo said:Jim78 said:I'm a new member so hello everyone.
Well the title pretty much sums my problem up. I've never had a girlfriend and have never had sex and the older I get the more insecure I fell about it. I feel like I'm missing out on some integral part of the human experience and it's getting me pretty down. I'm really shy around women and can only remember ever asking a couple out for a date and got turned down. I have fairly low self esteem and don't feel "good enough" and that I will just get rejected/hurt again. I think I'm a decent guy and women seem to like me but I struggle when it comes to relationships and sex. it's embarrasing being like this at my age (i'm 33) and I feel like such a loser.
All my friends are in relationships and I feel like I'm being left behind. I'm so lonely at the moment and am pretty depressed.
You revealed the root of your problem in your post. Like a dog can smell fresh meat, women can smell insecurity and celibacy. And they don't like it. The good news is that as a man, even at 33, you still have years ahead of yourself to improve your attractiveness.
My advice is to work on your shyness and low self-esteem. If you don't already, you should start exercising. I don't mean to bulk up and become macho man, but maybe just go for a jog once a day. Exercising is one of the most productive things you can do with your free time and it increases your testosterone levels (which should help a bit with your self esteem issues). You also need to work on your depression. See a psychiatrist and take pills if you have to. You need to fix yourself before women find you attractive.
Sad, but true.
Thanks for the replies everyone, sorry i disappeared. i've been trying to alter my life a little.i've cut down on drinking and started exercising and try to be out of the house a lot. i have tried ignoring the fact i'm depressed and it really hasn't helped so the next step is asking for some help (which i'm not good at). i'm also going to try again at meeting some new people - maybe a walking group or something active.
clean
Member
This is a good thing. Don't deny yourself a pat on the back for devoting time to yourself and your health - mental and physical. When it comes to depression, don't expect to be able to talk yourself out of it. If it were that easy, it wouldn't be such a debilitating illness. You're on the right track. It may take some time, but keep doing what you're doing and you will feel better.
