New here...

[ScandalousGeek]

Hi All...

I'm new here and I thought I'd introduce myself. I'm a 26 year old nerdy plus size woman. I live with a bunch of housemates in Western Massachusetts. I travel a lot for work. I'm a closeted bisexual. I write, I love music, books, and dancing (when no one else can see me of course), and I live vicariously through characters on TV or in movies.

I've always been a little bit of a loner...never really had a lot of friends and never had a significant other. Lately, however, it's been worse than ever. I feel like even when I'm with people I'm alone. I get incredibly introverted when I'm in a new social situation. I'm constantly either clinging desperately on to the few friends I have or pushing them away to wallow in self-pity. I feel pathetic and that makes being so alone even worse.

The past few months have been horrible. I was so miserable and isolated at one point that I seriously considered ending my life. I realize now that things actually can get better, but I really need support to pull myself out of this hole I'm in. I'm hoping that if I start to voice my loneliness to others I'll find a way to feel better about myself and my situation.

Thank you all for listening. I look forward to getting to know you all.

 

[Tex Is Lost]

Welcome to the forum

 

[edgecrusher]

hey and welcome

 

[SophiaGrace]

I hope this forum helps you to realize you aren't alone in your loneliness and that we can offere the support to you that you need to get through your loneliness.

Welcome to ALL.

 

[Minus]

Welcome

 

[Punisher]

Hi ScandalousGeek. Welcome to ALL

 

[BrianD]

Welcome!

I was happy to listen. Nice to know I am not the only newbie ( or the only nerdy person )

 

[SherryGee]

hey scandalousgeek

 

[21acceptedbeingalone]

I am 21 and when I was in middle school to high school I was depressed a lot for similar reasons. I had a handful of friends who really didn't give a rats ass about me yet I clung to them because I was introverted and socially akward around new people. I hated myself for this as well because it made me feel like a tool. Eventually I realized Id rather not have them to hang out with at all then be their dorky friend they could make fun of for entertainment. So I basically told them off and stopped hanging out with them. During college I have just given up on making new friends and have lived pretty much as a loner. I have been happier than I was in many years before that, but it obviouisly has it downsides too. Don't know if I helped, probably didn't. Sorry lol.

But I know how it feels to be that depressed and it sucks. People who have never been depressed can't understand it. Just try saying positive things to yourself. I used to always insult myself in my mind, think I was acting stupid etc. I would just further the downwards spiral of sadness. I tried making a conscious effort not to criticize myself in my mind about everything and it hepled. Had enough people being jerks to me, realized that part of being sad is all in your mind. If you can find out what makes you happy and what at least gets you on even ground so you don't feel depressed. People around you can't take that away.

 

[passerthrough]

Hi All...

I'm new here and I thought I'd introduce myself. I'm a 26 year old nerdy plus size woman. I live with a bunch of housemates in Western Massachusetts. I travel a lot for work. I'm a closeted bisexual. I write, I love music, books, and dancing (when no one else can see me of course), and I live vicariously through characters on TV or in movies.

I've always been a little bit of a loner...never really had a lot of friends and never had a significant other. Lately, however, it's been worse than ever. I feel like even when I'm with people I'm alone. I get incredibly introverted when I'm in a new social situation. I'm constantly either clinging desperately on to the few friends I have or pushing them away to wallow in self-pity. I feel pathetic and that makes being so alone even worse.

The past few months have been horrible. I was so miserable and isolated at one point that I seriously considered ending my life. I realize now that things actually can get better, but I really need support to pull myself out of this hole I'm in. I'm hoping that if I start to voice my loneliness to others I'll find a way to feel better about myself and my situation.

Thank you all for listening. I look forward to getting to know you all.

Hi. I'm so new here I haven't stopped shaking yet. I just had to reply, because I felt so many things in your post could have been written by me. Especially the one about living through movie characters, that one made laugh(my first laugh today! Bless you!). I write a lot of fan fiction and I can get completely obsessed about tv shows and movies, and fall in love with characters so easily, so I totally get that part. I hope this place can be a ladder out of that hole for both of us. Welcome.

 

[SophiaGrace]

Oh wow I'm glad this forum helps people to feel understood and not feel so alone.