Partly Empty

[macarmela16]

Hello all. To start with, I really don't have what you call a lonely life and I might be in the wrong forum but I guess with how I'm feeling now, little insecurities and some questions bout myself here and there, I feel like I may partly belong here. I'm 27 years old with a loving family, lots of friends and a stable work. I share part of my salary to my family and that makes me happy that's why I work really hard. I see to it to be there for my friends, making them laugh or just even smile makes me really happy. Doing some adventures and sports make me happy. Eating good food, makes me happy. Yes, it seems like I'm living a happy life. So, why did I join this forum? If you haven't notice, I never mentioned about my love life. It is because I never had a love life. Yes, never! I'm 27 years old but I never had a relationship, even short ones. I never experienced falling in love thus, never experienced being broken hearted. I guess some of you are now thinking, I think I'm in the wrong forum or site. I should be going to those sites or chat rooms to find a guy. Just to make this clear, I'm here not to find a guy for me, I'm here just to share how I feel. And I hope some of you will understand. I'm a happy person and I wanna be happy always but there is this part of me that's saying my happiness is not complete. Not complete because nobody loves me or even LOVED me (romantically). And yes, this is the part where I sometimes feel insecure and question myself. Am I this ugly? Do I have a bad attitude? Should I change my being tomboyish? Should I be slimmer and act like lady? But even with these questions, I get to provide answers. I see some who (really Sorry to say this) are not also beautiful like me and yet they have somebody who loves them or had experienced being loved. There are people also who many don't like their attitude and yet, there are still guys who still love them despite their bad attitude. There are also ladies I know who are bigger than me or act weird and act tomboyish than me but still, there are guys who are still madly in love with them. But why not with me? I can just count in my 1 hand the guys who courted me. Actually, they're just 3 of them. Why I never had a relationship with any of them? It is because they stopped courting me even before I can give them an answer. Which makes me question myself even more. AM I just not really lovable? Then I guess it is not true that each and every one of us has a partner in life or for some they would say, a soul mate. And yes, this is the part of my life which is lonely.

Sorry for my post. I guess it's too long already. I just wanna share how I feel and I hope nobody gets irritated or angry on what I just wrote. Thanks a lot for having this site where I can pour out my true feelings about this thing coz I never get to share this part of me to anyone I know.

 

[Bluey]

Hi there and welcome here macarmela16. Where you posted it was just fine but all move it to the new members forum for you as its your fist post I think it well be better there if that's ok with you

No need to be sorry for the post. There is a lot longer posts on here and BTW I read all of it with interest. I have had two GF be for. One at 17 that lasted 9 months and one at 18 that lasted for 9 moths. And another the other year back that lasted for 3 months. Part from that I have spent most of my 33 years alone.

Let me asher you your in the right place. There is a lot that can connect/understand with what you have put. Me included.

I also know what you mean with the looks. I look at guys I think am better looking then him so why am I on my own sometimes. Well its not me being big headed as you know its just me wondering whats wrong with me. Well, I know there is nothing wrong with me and I just haven't meet the right girl yet. Am sure its the same for you and you well probably agree with me on a moor positive day. If not its ok to disagree with me lol plenty do

You basically say in your posts the things I have said be for that make you happy. That there are many things to happiness like job, friends, food and of course that special loved one. You seem to be a very balanced person.

I have also looked at the dating sights and with out any joy. easy to fined girls to cam with not my thing. But not so easy to find what am looking for. Good time hopefully well end in moor but if not hopefully I get a kiss and a hug lol,, am just a man after all and human and would and do enjoy a kiss and a hug. I am normal I think.

I don't think looks are that important tho. I have fancied a not so good looking girl be for just because how she was and how we got on. That was a no go as she was marred and also I was best man at her wedding so I did the decent thing and keep them feelings to myself. I may be on my own but at least I can sleep with a clean conchens. Not many in this world that can say that.

I hope you come back here you sound like an interesting person

 

[IgnoredOne]

macarmela16 - that's rather curious. Where do you spend most of the social time that you have? Are those places with many singles? That might be the reason why you haven't found anyone interested in you yet.

Regards,
IO

 

[Nat]

Some people just have bad luck, or haven't been looking in the right places. And thats what this forum is for!
You seem friendly, happy, intelligible.
The thing is, I find a lot of it is to do with personality. Despite what modern society says about image, your personality is also a part of THAT SAME IMAGE.
I have a very hard time making friends or meeting girls, mainly because I'm weird, unique & slightly different, in terms of culture that is.
I listen to different music, I dress differently, I speak differently, I have different opinions and morals.
Because of this, your average person will find me a bit too extreme, or imposing. Once in my whole life, have I ever found a group of people that I fit in with, and that quickly dissipated.

This doesn't seem to be the problem with you though.
Like Bluey said, nothing is wrong, Its just about people. Meeting the right person/Hanging out with the right people/Going to the right places. They all fit together.

 

[macarmela16]

Thanks a lot for the reply. Yeah, you're right, maybe I haven't found the right one for me. Maybe I just need to be patient and just don't think bout it that much. Sometimes you just really think of it because you see most of your friends with their partners which makes you think, there's really something missing with me...And to answer IgnoredOne, my friends are both single and attached.

Thanks

 

[lonelyloser]

I am not sure if this is the case for you, but I have high standards and therefore I do not date that much. I know if I lowered my standards esp. in looks I could probably attract more dates, but I can't really get myself to do it. Something worth considering which I never did but wish I did was going to a relationship psychologist. They might help you assess what you're doing right and wrong. It might be something very simple that you're overlooking and you just need someone to point it out to you. Just a thought.