Questions for the Women

[Span]

If a guy has an inability to trust due to clear emotional baggage, is he worth an effort/time of day? If he is quiet and shy but otherwise friendly and (hopefully) decent company, would a girl spend any time trying to unlock his problems?

I can only speak personally but I would say that ANYONE who is decent company, friendly and sociable is worth spending time with!!
If a guy likes to spend time by himself, and i'm talking a good deal of time to his own thoughts (meditation and individual sports (eg bike riding/running) is this a bad thing?/would this turn someone off a relationship with them?

If I were with someone who spent 'a great deal' of time away from me, I'd feel as if I were surplus to requirements - Sports are fine but be careful not to neglect us females too much


And finally, because it has posed a problem before: My ability to look after myself without need of anybody else has been a barrier in the past - my final question for this post is: Is complete self sufficiency in the majority of tasks (talking about things like cooking, etc) a barrier to a relationship?

I wouldn't call it an obstacle but again, us ladies do like to feel that we are 'needed' for some things and if you take over too much inthe kitchen and suchlike, I personally would feel rather excluded....... Take a back seat sometimes and allow others to do things for you! You may learn to enjoy it!!!

 

[Catori]

I think it might be cool to have a thread where you can ask women thier opinions on dating or relationship issues Soooo...ask away!

Girls, I'll start this.
1.What are some of the behaviors that you find attractive in a man on a date?
2. What are some behaviors you don't like on a date?

1. For me, I like it when they rush to hold the door open and when they offer thier jacket to you when it's cold. You know they are cold but, would rather see you warm : ) I guess, I like the feeling of being cared for.

2. NOTHING, and I mean NOTHING turns me off anymore than going on a date and seeing a man be rude to a waitress or someone helping us. There was one man I went out on a date with who was a very intelligent and sucessful man. We double dated with a friend of mine and he was angry that the waiter hadn't made it round. He ordered drinks and then said, "Hurry it up" to the waiter. His tone was rude and my friend and I looked at each other. He didn't get another date. Nothing he could have said or done that evening would have made up for what he did. You can tell a lot by a person by looking at how they treat others-especially others that that person can't gain anything from. I don't care how much money a man has, or how good he looks or how sucessful he is; if he treats someone badly, especially someone in a service field, I wouldn't give him the time of day. It's not what a man has, it's how he acts that impresses me.

things i feel that are important men should do
Give sympathy, not solutions,Cuddle more,Be romantic,‘Make love,’ not just ‘have sex'.Be good with foreplay,Be emotionally open,Have passion,Be equal partners.

 

[h i]

i recently met a woman who doesnt want to give birth. shes okay with adopting a child maybe 5 years or older later in life, but doesnt want to give birth. is this a phase? is it common? other then pain of child birth, why wouldnt women want to have children?

 

[cheaptrickfan]

i recently met a woman who doesnt want to give birth. shes okay with adopting a child maybe 5 years or older later in life, but doesnt want to give birth. is this a phase? is it common? other then pain of child birth, why wouldnt women want to have children?

Some women may be at risk of serious health complications from the pregnancy itself. There's also a risk of passing down a hereditary condition if a woman and her husband know that they both carry a gene for a condition, they may not want to take the chance of having a child who is going to suffer pretty much his whole life.

Some women may not like the idea of the extreme physical changes during pregnancy and yes, the thought of childbirth itself is kind of scary. All you need is to know one woman who had a traumatic birth experience to make you realize that it's not a risk-free proposition.

 

[nerdygirl]

I used to be really into the idea of adoption, rather than giving birth. My thought was that these kids may have never known a loving family, and neither had I... it would be a great gift to each of us, really. We would each have found family where we had none. With adoption at that age, both people get a choice about it. There is something really nice about being chosen, rather than simply assigned by biological functions.

 

[Get Down!]

i recently met a woman who doesnt want to give birth. shes okay with adopting a child maybe 5 years or older later in life, but doesnt want to give birth. is this a phase? is it common? other then pain of child birth, why wouldnt women want to have children?

okay i'm 20 and i don't think i want to give birth. ever.
people like to say that's just a phase or something but that actually gets me mad. i doubt it's a phase.
the thing is that i don't like children. as simple as that, i find babies ugly and annoying.
then i don't like to think of anything inside me. i don't see giving birth as something natural and beautiful, to me is mostly disgusting and accompanied with lots of fluids. not to mention painful.

so if i was ever to have i child i'd go for an adoption too. I would like to start with a 2 year or something but still not too old so that bringing up the child would be completely up to me.

 

[PoisonFlowers]

i recently met a woman who doesnt want to give birth. shes okay with adopting a child maybe 5 years or older later in life, but doesnt want to give birth. is this a phase? is it common? other then pain of child birth, why wouldnt women want to have children?

I agree with all that's been said already. Getting pregnant is a big decision. Not all women are raring to do so. Personally, I don't mind kids, but I don't want one inside of me ;P

In the future, if I think that I am prepared to provide a home for a child maybe I'll adopt. There are already loads of kids who need a home after all, so why bring another one into the world?

 

[Lawliet]

ooh I have a question, sorry if it sounds confusing, I seem to have brain fog this morning. OK Maybe its because I haven't had sex but I take the whole issue of nudity seriously so I thought a girl would only give me pictures of herself if she only really liked me but I've received a whole lot of explicit pictures/videos from women who don't even care about me... some even stop talking to me after a while. So I'm confused, do they not care about what I can do with the pictures, not that I would.

 

[shells]

Q: ooh I have a question, sorry if it sounds confusing, I seem to have brain fog this morning. OK Maybe its because I haven't had sex but I take the whole issue of nudity seriously so I thought a girl would only give me pictures of herself if she only really liked me but I've received a whole lot of explicit pictures/videos from women who don't even care about me... some even stop talking to me after a while. So I'm confused, do they not care about what I can do with the pictures, not that I would.

A: This is just my take, but some girls have very low self-esteem and don't get very much attention. Online, girls can get showered with attention and get a bunch of guys to say "take your top off! n00ds plz!". So, to keep the attention coming, they send pictures. Guy says, "wow, ur hawt!" BAM, her self-esteem has been boosted.

I'd say that the girl you're dealing with is either very insecure or wants attention, maybe even both. Not all women are like this, but I wouldn't take it personally, either.

Men and women need to be careful because they don't realize how they can put their futures in jeopardy if those pictures/videos get in the wrong hands.
Some women don't realize how devastating this can be to their futures if the wrong person gets a hold of those pictures. It can tarnish a person's reputation and even put them at risk in future careers.

 

[darkwall]

I have a question: what in the hell makes you think you can answer for half the world's population, simply because you share the same genitals?

 

[shells]

I thought it was obvious that many of the statements in this thread are personal opinions and perspectives.

 

[cheaptrickfan]

I have a question: what in the hell makes you think you can answer for half the world's population, simply because you share the same genitals?

I doubt that anyone here is trying to make blanket statements for any gender.

Perhaps this question would be better served if it was directed at posters who claim that "all women" are psychos or don't know what they want, or are sluts.

 

[Naleena]

I thought it was obvious that many of the statements in this thread are personal opinions and perspectives.

That is EXACTLY what this thread is about. As stated in the title "Questions for the women" As far as I know, no one on here has claimed to answer for half the worlds population.

 

[darkwall]

"I think it might be cool to have a thread where you can ask women thier [sic] opinions on dating or relationship issues"

If this is the case, then obviously those views are meant to be somewhat representative, otherwise there is no value in it at all.

Look: you said this is a place for WOMEN to be asked advice by MEN. That implies that there is a difference between that and simply PEOPLE asking PEOPLE.

Inevitably a majority of questions have used this ideal of "what women want" - which is simply a media myth. Hence, why wouldn't WOMEN want a baby, why would WOMEN stop posting pictures, and you are no more qualified to answer that as a woman than I am as a man, which is why this entire premise is logically flawed. If you don't get what I'm saying, then forget it.

 

[Steel]

"I think it might be cool to have a thread where you can ask women thier [sic] opinions on dating or relationship issues"

If this is the case, then obviously those views are meant to be somewhat representative, otherwise there is no value in it at all.

Look: you said this is a place for WOMEN to be asked advice by MEN. That implies that there is a difference between that and simply PEOPLE asking PEOPLE.

Inevitably a majority of questions have used this ideal of "what women want" - which is simply a media myth. Hence, why wouldn't WOMEN want a baby, why would WOMEN stop posting pictures, and you are no more qualified to answer that as a woman than I am as a man, which is why this entire premise is logically flawed. If you don't get what I'm saying, then forget it.

The vast majority of all posts (including your own) posted on this forum are opinions, and not fact. To suggest that in such complex areas as relationships that representative statements could ever be made would be ludicrous.

Personally, I don't find the idea of asking a specific gender questions threatening. Men and women are different; aside from physiological difference, socially defined differences still exist. Therefore, this thread has value.

 

[Naleena]

Hence, why wouldn't WOMEN want a baby, why would WOMEN

"I think it might be cool to have a thread where you can ask women thier [sic] opinions on dating or relationship issues"

If this is the case, then obviously those views are meant to be somewhat representative, otherwise there is no value in it at all.

Look: you said this is a place for WOMEN to be asked advice by MEN. That implies that there is a difference between that and simply PEOPLE asking PEOPLE.

Inevitably a majority of questions have used this ideal of "what women want" - which is simply a media myth.stop posting pictures, and you are no more qualified to answer that as a woman than I am as a man, which is why this entire premise is logically flawed. If you don't get what I'm saying, then forget it.

There is a difference between men asking men and men asking women.
Women ARE different. Men ARE different. If you are so annoyed by this thread, perhaps you should abstain from reading it? It appeared you were emotionally upset by a few of these posts. It must be hard to sit by and read posts from people who have bought into a media myth and think themselves qualified to state thier opinion. Thank god for people like you who keep the rest of us straight by letting everyone know just how wrong they are. What would we do without such intellectual gurus? Make yourself happy. Leave us simpletons to our demise and go post yourself a "people asking people" thread.

 

[darkwall]

How could you infer that I was upset from any of these posts? My point was this: you probably have much more in common with many men than you do with many women. There have been posts on here from some prick talking about "women wanting to be dominated", just as there are some questions asking what women like - what I'm saying is that they grow from the same root; that of gender bias. So of course you can only talk about what YOU like, but the questioner isn't really interested in what YOU like because that's of no useful value, but rather trying to extrapolate from that what WOMEN like in general.

Say I have a "question for the women": what do women look for in a man? We are talking about a mass of people, whom you are as much an observer of as a man, so your experiential advice is of equal (i.e. little) value. I sincerely believe that in and among the thoughtful responses that you and others have made there is also a tendency to stereotype, often lying in the particular slant of the question, which is often phrased as if women share divine secrets inaccessible to men (and vice versa).

Listen: people are perpetually interested in the "quick-fix". A guy goes on here, hears how women like to be complimented, and goes off happy thinking that can be applied to all women. You may only have spoken about how YOU like to be complimented, but like I said he's really interested in the quick-fix rule of thumb bullshit, so he goes off and starts pissing off a bunch of women with sycophantic burbling. Fielding the same question to a group of men AND women emphasises its subjectivity. Right?

As to why I'm here: I disagree with you, and that should be justification enough.

 

[shells]

I'll share my pack with you all.

 

[EveWasFramed]

There are a lot of things I could say, but I think that for the moment, I am going to point out that this is a simple thread in which other members of the forum can "ask women" questions. There are no right or wrong answers (just opinions) and it is obviously limited to women on the forum - not the entire female population, as has been suggested.
This is a good thread - keep it On Topic from here on out.

 

[Jesse]

Question ladies: If you go out with a guy and he doesn't touch you physically (arm around you, kiss, hand holding, etc.) would that make you think he didn't like you?