LGH1288 said:
Hi INH -- How are you today? I was wondering what some of the "different reasons" were why you were bullied and ridiculed. Was it your appearance? Was it your intellect? Something else? Your ALL nic reminds me of a song by "The Kinks" called "A Face In The Crowd". Some of the lyrics go "Am I just a face in the crowd, is that all I'll ever be? Don't want to be anyone that isn't really me!" So, I wonder about who "InsertNameHere" is. If you don't mind, would you share that with me? If you took a blank piece of paper and listed your plus and minus attributes would you be more proud of yourself and less disappointed with the net result of your personal inventory? Please don't be hard on yourself. LG
I'm alright I suppose. I suppose the username could have double meaning; it's supposed to be kind of witty, but at the same time I suppose it could represent that I feel like a nobody. As for being bullied and ridiculed, it's due to many factors.
When I was three years old I was attacked by a dog and it tore my face open, leaving a massive scar. For years I wasn't able to get any surgery on it since I was young and my face was still growing so it was really ugly and visible. I often got made fun of for that. I also have a speech impediment so, again, I was being made fun of. For the longest time this stuff built up and just made my self-esteem worse, especially between grades 6-8. At that point I was suicidal and had no self esteem so no longer cared about my personal appearance; I often went to school wearing dirty clothes and having body odour. Of course that contributed to being made fun of further.
In the beginning of grade 9 I moved to a new town(well actually an old town, I was just moving back after years away from there). I had a few friends there so things got slightly better and the school counsellors became supportive. I stopped crying out in class and began getting less suicidal thoughts, but the depression and lack of self-esteem was still there and still remains to this day. So that's my story extremely summed up. There's many other details I probably left out, but you get the gist.