So how shitty is everyone's birthday?

[Everydaystruggle33]

To be honest your responses did come off dismissive. If someone created thread saying they were unhappy about spending the holidays alone I wouldn't respond with Christmas is mostly for children and isn't something that everyone celebrates so I don't see the big deal. I can appreciate that all people have differing values in life and respect that even though I may not agree with a particular thing, I can still empathize with them.

Seems to me she just answered a question and offered her opinion. She wasn't being dismissive.

I don't see what the big deal is to be honest. There are worse things happening in the world than being alone on a birthday.

I just don't feel that there is any need for an adult to want too much ruckus.

I think the above comments are pretty dismissive like I said she may not agree but for myself if I didn't understand why a particular thing upset someone I wouldn't tell them that there are worse things in the world or that I don't understand why an adult would care about this particular thing.

 

[ladyforsaken]

With the exception of a few texts from my immediate family I usually spend my birthdays having dinner and a drink alone. How does everyone else spend their birthdays when you basically don't have anyone?

That's understandable if one would like to have people remember their birthdays and do something with them. I admit, I think it is nice to have some acknowledgement from people close to me.

If I had literally no one in my life, I will spend my birthday on this very forum and treat myself to something nice. If I could have a fancier than usual dinner for myself too that would be sweet. I wouldn't be bothered so much whether others do anything for me or not. If they do, I would appreciate it. If not, oh well.

Actually, knowing myself, I may not even be bothered to do anything differently for myself and just treat it like any other day.

Acknowledgement of one's existence is always nice. I certainly don't disagree with you on that. I just don't feel that there is any need for an adult to want too much ruckus. Although sometimes a little ruckus is fun. To each his/her own.

I am with Aisha on this. Well, if there was too much ruckus for my birthday, it would make me feel uneasy. I tend to spend my birthdays quietly.

This year, I spend my birthday at my currently second home, the hospital. It's not ideal and wish I could just be home the entire day but, well, can't always have what I want, even if it's just a day in.

 

[SofiasMami]

I'm with Aisha as well - birthdays are nice but especially since I have a kid, my own birthdays have faded into the background. I always think I'll do something special for myself but I don't. I usually have some fleeting sense of being thankful that I got to complete another year of my life instead of the alternative.
My own kid asked me last year "Why don't we ever do anything for your birthday?"
Last year I bought myself a new smartphone so that was nice lol.

-Teresa

 

[OnlyMe]

I don't celebrate my birthday, mainly because with the exception of my eldery mother I don't have anyone in my life to celebrate it with.

I actually feel bad because I show no interest in my birthday and I know it's a special day to her.

The last time I had a birthday 'party' was back in 1993 when I was 16 (I'm now 38).

One of my friends at the time went to a lot of trouble of organising people from school and the ensuing night out.
He also made this cool birthday card and had everyone sign it.

It was a great night and looking back I am forever grateful for him going to the trouble of doing it.

 

[Tiina63]

While I wouldn't want 'ruckus' on my birthday I do wish, in my heart of hearts, that I had family to spend it with.
Times like birthdays and Christmas do, for many of us who are alone, emphasise the lack of close ties in our lives and are often sad and wistful times for this reason. OP-I hope that in the future you have some better birthdays.
OnlyMe-your friend was really good to have organised a party for you back in 1993. Are you still in touch or have you gone your separate ways?

 

[Aisha]

To be honest your responses did come off dismissive. If someone created thread saying they were unhappy about spending the holidays alone I wouldn't respond with Christmas is mostly for children and isn't something that everyone celebrates so I don't see the big deal. I can appreciate that all people have differing values in life and respect that even though I may not agree with a particular thing, I can still empathize with them.

I think the above comments are pretty dismissive like I said she may not agree but for myself if I didn't understand why a particular thing upset someone I wouldn't tell them that there are worse things in the world or that I don't understand why an adult would care about this particular thing.

I am sorry if it seemed dismissive to you. But in your original post you gave no indication that it upset you or that you wanted sympathy or only opinions that were the same as yours. All you said was that you spend your birthdays alone-as do I often- and asked a question. "With the exception of a few texts from my immediate family I usually spend my birthdays having dinner and a drink alone. How does everyone else spend their birthdays when you basically don't have anyone?" What I expressed to that was the answer I would give to that question and my own opinion on the subject. I have mentioned multiple times already that I wasn't trying to trivialize anyone's troubles or diminish something that might be significant to someone else. All I said was that I don't understand its significance myself and there are things I consider to be worse. That's just my opinion, it wasn't a personal attack on anyone. I wasn't trying to scorn anyone. I have apologized and said I hope better for you later repeatedly. Perhaps next time it would be a good idea to indicate that you would rather not hear from anyone who differs in opinion to you. I can and do feel and offer empathy whether I am in a situation or agree with someone or not. But I only thought you were asking for an opinion with this thread. That's all.

---

While I wouldn't want 'ruckus' on my birthday I do wish, in my heart of hearts, that I had family to spend it with.
Times like birthdays and Christmas do, for many of us who are alone, emphasise the lack of close ties in our lives and are often sad and wistful times for this reason.

I can understand this. We are all on this forum for a reason after all. Family is a wonderful thing to have, and people who are able to spend time with their family, whatever the time or day are blessed in that way. I do truly wish for everyone to have close relationships, because it's not being alone at whatever time but loneliness in itself that hurts and saddens when there is a lack of ties.

 

[JHK]

I have never had an actual "birthday party". My parents never celebrated anything.

The only time I got Christmas was last year and only because I was unable to walk and stuck in a hospital. It was really, really... awkward.

 

[LonelySutton]

Usually my birthday is pretty sucky. It falls on a holiday so typically no work celebrations. But last year my cat got sick and I spent the entire day miserable with a house that smelled like poo.

Mine is coming up soon and hopefully... it will be ok.

I do enjoy the facebook happy b-days.

 

[Punisher]

I have never had an actual "birthday party". My parents never celebrated anything.

Same here.

 

[SofiasMami]

The first year I was here, I was perturbed that no one said "happy birthday" when my birthday rolled around. Then I realized that my birthday was hidden from public view so I changed that. I've truly been touched by the birthday wishes I've gotten in past years, it's really meant a lot, especially since it otherwise usually ends up being just another day.

-Teresa

 

[ladyforsaken]

I have never had an actual "birthday party". My parents never celebrated anything.

Same here.

Same here too.

 

[Devon]

In the UK (being a friendly bunch) we have cyber parties cake and everything!
I can only say that you lot are extremely lucky that I graced you with my presence and presents coz I do cyber presents too. For example I have just given a very expensive motorbike to a friend which made his day!
His wife found out though and I got :club:
Pooh happens

 

[sk66rc]

I don't like birthday parties... I'd rather people not say anything about my birthday... Is that weird?

 

[TheRealCallie]

It's just another day to me. If someone says happy birthday, I say thank you and move on. If no one does, oh well. I don't have my birthday on the forum because I don't want the attention.

I do, however, make myself a cake every year. lol Any excuse for cake, right?

 

[ardour]

There usually g a few comments on my facebook page. That's fine. I never feel like going out or parteeeing on birthdays.

 

[M_also_lonely]

Once I sent a birthday gift to myself, because I wanted to know how it feels to receive a gift from someone. I concluded that it would be a better feeling if someone would have given it to me instead. I have never received any gift from anyone. I have never received surprise parties like other people get.
My sister forgets my birthday. Every time, I wait at 12:00 at night, thinking that someone will come with a cake and wish me happy birthday and all of them would stand around me and wish me, and would give me gifts, just like they do with each other.
On other peoples birthday they celebrate and post their photos with their friends and relatives. I dream of having such a person for me too. But that dream has not yet fulfilled, and probably will never be.

 

[Despicable Me]

Once I sent a birthday gift to myself, because I wanted to know how it feels to receive a gift from someone. I concluded that it would be a better feeling if someone would have given it to me instead.

Aww... I don't even know what to say to that. That makes me so sad, lol.

I have never received any gift from anyone.

Your parents or your sister has never even given you a gift? Never once? Or are you just meaning someone besides them?

 

[M_also_lonely]

Your parents or your sister has never even given you a gift? Never once? Or are you just meaning someone besides them?

Father had no money to feed us when I was a child. Birthdays were not that important then. Although times have changed, so have the preferences. And sister, she doesnt care.

 

[Sci-Fi]

Stressed over my birthday this year, just didn't want it to come. My mother embarrassed me in typical fashion at work, didn't even think that maybe I didn't want to make a big deal of it. And a few people who should have remembered my birthday completely forgot about it, which was probably a good thing because they might have not been very sensitive about it. Personally I'd rather forget about them all together now and no even acknowledge it.