There Can Be Diferent Types Of Lonliness, Which One Are You?

[badhairday]

1. I have no friends
2. My closest relations are dead, the remaining ones don't wish to know me.
4. My husband has recently been diagnosed with schizoid personality disorder- so I feel alone in our marriage.
6. People don't understand me. I am quiet, sensitive and deep, it scares people off.

 

[TheDiscolouredRose]

1 and 3, without a doubt

 

[Nuzzy Nuz]

5... :/ *shrugs*

 

[forsakenstoner]

1. Regular bases i speak to my mother, my dog, and my cat. My mom is sort of my friend, but i cant talk to her about my feelings because she doesnt understand how a "young" person could feel sad all the time.

2. My parents dont understand me, they think im a moron. My brother also thinks im stupid. Which is probably true.

3. Lack of an intimate relationship

4.&5. Im just alienated in general. Partially by choice, ive found that most people cant understand or relate to me, vice versa. For example, since ive relocated im closer to one of my cousins. I cannot stand her, she is extremely rude and has no filter. Like she goes out if her way to make you feel bad about yourself. Last time she tried hanging out with me she said "id rather hang out with your brother, hes more out going". Umm.. why would you say that to someone..? Why would i want to be friends with someone who says that kind of stuff to me? It makes more sense to just be alone, at least i moderately enjoy my own company

 

[PenDragon]

At the start my loneliness was forced upon me in very early stages of my life but now It's my choice to stay like this way. but sometimes I do wish If there is something that can be done to reverse the process but I know It won't be happening. Now I am alone cause I want to be alone I'm a lot better this way.

Like I have said I don't have any friends in out there in real world, I had once one friend or two may be but they are long gone, I don't even know if they are alive or not. The only few friends I have are online friends and I'm glad they listen when I say something and that is the only thing keeps me going for a while.

 

[Frodothelost]

ask to god why did he set me on it.
i have nothing to say.
i dont know

 

[Juliet]

1. Not many friends. That's fine, though. The ones I have are fantastic.

3. No intimacy whatsoever.

5. What can I say?

 

[sanguineRose]

Umm I don't know what to say about my loneliness. I don't have any friends as most of the people here. I used to have friends but I think I was not cool or interesting enough to be in such kind of groups. I spend most of my time in reading or writing stories and playing video games. I love seclusion because it gives me ideas for my stories but sometimes I feel like I need someone to talk to and when I realize that there is not really anyone to share my feelings with, I feel lonely.

 

[differentlonelygirl]

I'm five of the six. Only because I'm in a relationship, previously I never was. So somehow I got .

Yah I consider myself one of the loneliest but it could be worse, could be a sick person who can never leave the hospital, with a rare disease. Because that's more painful in my opinion.

 

[ojtwtn]

1, 3, 5, 6

 

[HorseLatitudes]

id say 1 and 5 (both)

I do have 3 friends, if I can say, im in love with one of them so, besides that, i have only got 'em since last year, ive been a lonely/friendless loser my whole life

and about 3 years with no gf,  but I do understand people in general, im truly empathic towards everybody, but im different so I never feel part of any group

 

[Michael99]

1, 3 and I'd say sometimes 5.

I don't have many friends, only like two really and I barely get to talk to them. I don't have much experience with intimate relationships at all. And I guess sometimes I feel like I'm not understood, at least by the people around me. Can't say I particularly blame them though, it is what it is.

 

[Myra]

I'm all of those types except type #4 because it doesn't apply to me

 

[StarDust]

Mostly #2.... but does it matter? Lonely is lonely. We pass through time ...

 

[TheSkaFish]

I think there can be many types of lonliness, usually because of something that people lacks. Everyone may be effected by a few of these but which one effects you the most?

3. Lack of an intimate relationship

5. The opposite sex doesn't understand you

6. People in general just don't understand you

These.

Also I'd say the flipsides of them, too. The opposite sex doesn't understand me, but I don't understand the opposite sex either. And people in general don't understand me, but I don't understand them either.

I don't understand how to be the kind of person the opposite sex wants. I seem to fundamentally NOT be that kind of person.

I also don't get people in general. The things people like, the things people think are cool, the personalities people like, I just don't get it. I don't see what the big deal is.

Lack of an intimate relationship has been wearing me down ever since intimate relationships became a thing, at least for my age group.
In high school, I thought, girls only go for muscly rich jocks and stoners now, and everyone is so young, no one really knows what they want anyway, so I guess since I'm not one of those "desirable", "popular" guys, I have to wait til college.

Then I got to college, and nothing changed - not with women's preferences, and not with me or my situation. I thought, I guess I have to wait until after school is over. Besides there's no one around I'm into anyway.

Then I got to after college. I met one person on another forum who I felt was what I was looking for all along, and I felt a brief surge of hope like all my waiting had finally paid off, but I couldn't figure out how to be cool enough for her. And that was it. My friends don't know anyone I would like, the dating sites don't seem to have anyone I like, and still women's preferences - overall - don't seem to have changed. It's still the same old thing, rich guys, meatheads, stoners, and cocky/"funny" ******** - all things I either don't like, don't agree with, don't make any sense to me, and/or just can't be - and I don't know how I can make up for not being those things.

I tried getting into interests. I tried expressing myself more. I tried to be friendlier. I tried to learn about interesting things. I tried to be authentic. It didn't work, nobody cared. Because it seems like without that macho personality and cocky charisma, guess what - nobody cares.

It's hard for me to say that it's not like that, because that's what I've experienced.
It's hard for me to have a positive attitude about dating and relationships and attraction, because the system appears to be based on ideas I don't agree with, and favors kinds of people I don't like, just because they are lucky enough to be born with the right stuff to be powerful, or at least to seem like it. And I feel like I just can't be any of these kinds of guys. I feel like I just don't have the right stuff, the stuff that women want.
And it's hard for me to be optimistic, because I've never been given a reason to be. Nothing good has ever happened to me with attraction, dating, relationships, etc., not even once. I've never even been close to a relationship with anyone I actually wanted. I haven't even gone on one date. It's a really shitty feeling. Not only that, but there's no indication when it's going to end either. I have no idea for sure what I need to be working on to get out of it. All I have is guesses, but I have a suspicion that it still won't be enough. If it was just like, I have to wait a year, or I have to lift x amount of weight, or make x amount of money, or learn x skill, or travel to x amount of countries, whatever, I could do that. At least I'd know I was working towards it. But I have no idea. All I know how to do is be "me", but "me" doesn't work, and the kinds of things that do appear to work, aren't "me".

I just turned another year older, not long ago. It's really starting to get scary that I'm never going to figure it out at all, or even if I do figure it out, it's already over, I already ruined any good chances I will ever get, and there's only people I'm not crazy about left anymore. So it's like, is it even worth it to still struggle? Yes, it would be worth it to me to say I beat singledom, instead of it beating me. It would be worth it to say that I threw off the limitation that life tried to force on me. But only for that purpose. Not because I'm that into whoever I would get, because any good choices, I'm not good enough for.