BeyondShy
Well-known member
- Joined
- Mar 15, 2015
- Messages
- 2,354
- Reaction score
- 164
Hello everyone.
I took a step back today and was thinking about this forum and particularly the people in it and how I have been interacting with the few people I have been talking with.
I have come across as a very defensive and mistrustful person and I realize it. I'm not used to people trying to reach out to me so instead of reaching out I take a step back. Or in my case I take ten steps back and put up a few more obstacles just to be safe.
So I didn't sleep last night and thought about this. I am not going to say I am not going to all of a sudden stop being defensive and mistrustful from here on out but I will promise you this. I won't take ten steps back anymore and by writing this I am eliminating an obstacle because I am trying to have you better understand me.
It was not hard for me at all to choose my screen name because this is what I really am, someone who is beyond shy. When you are scared to interact with people on the internet because you are afraid of what they will think of you then you know you got it bad. I have a hard time accepting that other people are like me, strange as that may sound.
As I said I was up last night and I came to a conclusion, or a crossroads. I can continue coming in here being apprehensive and questioning the motives of others or try to accept them for what they are and that's a kind ear, a kind hand and a warm heart.
I don't want to be alone. I don't hate people. I'm just afraid to be around them because of my fear of being laughed at and rejected. And I know I have a lot to offer but I want someone out there to give me a chance and I want to give myself a chance too. This is why I am taking this opportunity to tell you how I feel and that I apologize too.
This is a great forum with so much support. And I have to give that a chance too.
Thanks for reading.
I took a step back today and was thinking about this forum and particularly the people in it and how I have been interacting with the few people I have been talking with.
I have come across as a very defensive and mistrustful person and I realize it. I'm not used to people trying to reach out to me so instead of reaching out I take a step back. Or in my case I take ten steps back and put up a few more obstacles just to be safe.
So I didn't sleep last night and thought about this. I am not going to say I am not going to all of a sudden stop being defensive and mistrustful from here on out but I will promise you this. I won't take ten steps back anymore and by writing this I am eliminating an obstacle because I am trying to have you better understand me.
It was not hard for me at all to choose my screen name because this is what I really am, someone who is beyond shy. When you are scared to interact with people on the internet because you are afraid of what they will think of you then you know you got it bad. I have a hard time accepting that other people are like me, strange as that may sound.
As I said I was up last night and I came to a conclusion, or a crossroads. I can continue coming in here being apprehensive and questioning the motives of others or try to accept them for what they are and that's a kind ear, a kind hand and a warm heart.
I don't want to be alone. I don't hate people. I'm just afraid to be around them because of my fear of being laughed at and rejected. And I know I have a lot to offer but I want someone out there to give me a chance and I want to give myself a chance too. This is why I am taking this opportunity to tell you how I feel and that I apologize too.
This is a great forum with so much support. And I have to give that a chance too.
Thanks for reading.