Hi all,
This is my first post here. Nice to "meet" you all.
Here's my deal: I am divorced and single, I have a very active social life. I usually have something planned on my days off with friends, and if not, I have lots of hobbies and interests to fill my time. I don't sit at home and mope around. I work long shifts 4 days/week, and the other days are pretty packed with dinners with friends, guitar lessons, lunch with my dad, going to the beach, reading, errands, doctors appts... you catch my drift.
I still feel lonely inside when i think about real connections with people. It's so weird, because I am SO busy, and I have a social life. How can I possibly be lonely, right? One thing I should mention is that I have a sort of "phone fear", when it comes to personal calls. I take a ton of calls for work everyday, so maybe that's why. I am not good with being in constant communication with anyone, therfor I do not create close connections with anyone (even though I have a lot of "friends").
I have a pretty bad relationship with my mom (she's bipolar), and she lives 1000 miles from me. I see my dad every 2 weeks, but we don't talk much otherwise. Other than that, I don't have any real connection to family. A random phone call once a month to relatives in FL (again, phone fear) is all I can muster so far.
I guess I have a form of social anxiety when it comes to daily closeness with someone. I have never seen this before in anyone else. I have NO trouble striking up a conversation over dinner with friends. I do that almost every weekend, so I am not sure what my issue is. Maybe I am just so used to being "alone" that I don't find the need to talk abotu daily manotony? I find myself feeling empty inside and jealous of people who have close relationships with their parents/friends/family. I see coworkers taling to peopel that they are close to on the phone and it makes me want that, but I just don't have it.
Any insight would be appreciated!
This is my first post here. Nice to "meet" you all.
Here's my deal: I am divorced and single, I have a very active social life. I usually have something planned on my days off with friends, and if not, I have lots of hobbies and interests to fill my time. I don't sit at home and mope around. I work long shifts 4 days/week, and the other days are pretty packed with dinners with friends, guitar lessons, lunch with my dad, going to the beach, reading, errands, doctors appts... you catch my drift.
I still feel lonely inside when i think about real connections with people. It's so weird, because I am SO busy, and I have a social life. How can I possibly be lonely, right? One thing I should mention is that I have a sort of "phone fear", when it comes to personal calls. I take a ton of calls for work everyday, so maybe that's why. I am not good with being in constant communication with anyone, therfor I do not create close connections with anyone (even though I have a lot of "friends").
I have a pretty bad relationship with my mom (she's bipolar), and she lives 1000 miles from me. I see my dad every 2 weeks, but we don't talk much otherwise. Other than that, I don't have any real connection to family. A random phone call once a month to relatives in FL (again, phone fear) is all I can muster so far.
I guess I have a form of social anxiety when it comes to daily closeness with someone. I have never seen this before in anyone else. I have NO trouble striking up a conversation over dinner with friends. I do that almost every weekend, so I am not sure what my issue is. Maybe I am just so used to being "alone" that I don't find the need to talk abotu daily manotony? I find myself feeling empty inside and jealous of people who have close relationships with their parents/friends/family. I see coworkers taling to peopel that they are close to on the phone and it makes me want that, but I just don't have it.
Any insight would be appreciated!
