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humourless said:
just games
im concerned about the level of your cheerfulness. Seems to me you have broken through the cheerfulness threshold. one of the forum rules. you are not alliwed to be too happy.

Thanks Humourless. My god i've just woken up from a dream and ..i think minus was talking to me i'm not joking.This really friendly voice said if you really want to meet the staff ( i thouht what the...staff.. you have staff :)  we're having a meeting 25th of June in Los Angeles .He then said your of course are welcome we know you've got a history with us we all like you.Then i thought hes taking the mickey we're in July ..i've got time to save for next years mate i'm so happy.
 
im irresistable
ardour cant get enough of me
hes obsessed
dont lose sleep
its not worth it
 
can I change my username to "homerless" by the way?
thats gotta be the best username ever invented
 
Siku said:
humourless said:
Im tempted to put siku on. He really knows how to make a person feel guilty and his writing is pretty orsum. He might go on my top 5 high moral grounders though. Hes real sunsetive. He is just what this forum needs. Humourless. Fits in perfectly.

Everyone has different types of sense of humor. I just prefer to stay away from the types that can be insensitive, carelessly arrogant or obnoxious. Ya know, treat people how you want to be treated. That's just giving a honeysuckle about other people other than yourself, and thinking before you speak. Forget morals, it's just common decency.

I know exactly who I am, and you can put a mask on me all you want. I've wore many in the past just trying to figure people out as well as myself. I've been in fact taking it off more lately hence my high moral grounds and voicing my opinion more than ever on here. Sorry if I disappoint you and I'm not more complex or fake. **** right I have high morals. You know what is the strongest breeding grounds for high morals? Self-reflection and being open-minded of other people's thoughts or feelings. Including but not limiting to your own. Having a clear outlook as to why these cycles of hate continues and where the problems in this world stem from. As well as understanding that no one is seemingly evil, and are only provoked or molded by being around selfishness for too long.

I coloured you so it's only fair you get to colour me. Now that we know where we both stand, expect me to tell you when you get out of line because that's who I am. You can play off anything you say as humor all you want, how, what, WHERE and when it's said shows a world of a difference. I've spent my entire life questioning if this is the real me as nearly everyone doubts it my entire life, so yeah I'm sensitive lol. Yes, I give a fresia enough to defend myself because I'm very insecure not because I'm fake or feel I have to prove myself to anyone anymore. I in fact do things because it's right and I genuinely hate seeing people hurt, and I'm a giant ******* softie. However, I lose such morals from selfish and insensitive people. Which leads me here. And just a fyi, my motivations are anything but trying to get a moderator position nor any position of power anywhere. It leads to corruption but thanks for that other indirect jab with that clearly and 'purely  humor', and nothing more.

Try some humor that doesn't fall on indirect jabs or mockery and playing like you aren't affected by the things people say while being the pot calling the kettle black talking about sensitivity. Again, leaves me to my point, treat others how you want to be treated. Simple. And if you don't like the heat, stop cooking up your sense of humor in the kitchen. I'm not going to go to a sophisticated art show and then mock them with my crayon and coloring book jokes followed by telling them to "lighten up" as I'm clearly just trying to gain attention without any regard to anyone else.

Man, I need to be more selfish and grow a sense of humor. I should let my material be at the cost of other people because it's very clever and inspiring. Then, I can finally come to terms with who I really am. Appreciate the provoking, I felt entirely compelled to explain myself and how much of an indifference we have right now. Thanks for leaving that door wide open waiting for me. Because y'know, my fake self just loves talking about myself and has something to prove. Yes, I am hypocritically stooping to your level. Because, there is no quicker way to get on my bad side than to call me fake.

I'm an INFJ and a Libra. Look my 'fake self' up. :)

I'm an INFJ and a Virgo.  I'm also sensitive.  No matter how many labels a person uses to describe themselves online, there's always more things such as idiosyncrasies and pet peeves to discover about a person.  I wouldn't call your labels a fake self; they're just vague hints at your true self, which can take someone a lifetime to fully discover.

The guy said he was humorless - so don't be too surprised if you don't find him funny.
 
Guzheng said:
I'm an INFJ and a Virgo.  I'm also sensitive.  No matter how many labels a person uses to describe themselves online, there's always more things such as idiosyncrasies and pet peeves to discover about a person.  I wouldn't call your labels a fake self; they're just vague hints at your true self, which can take someone a lifetime to fully discover.

The guy said he was humorless - so don't be too surprised if you don't find him funny.

Labels, in my opinion don't really help anyone.  It's just another way to make excuses.  You are, simply put, you.  The only "label" you need is your name.  Everything else doesn't really matter.  People will like you or they won't and in online communities, if people don't like you, more often than not, it's because they don't really know you.  People online like to judge the hell out of anyone not fitting their ideas of who a person should be or not giving the advice they want to hear.  It's bullshit, to be honest.  You can't really know a person by what they type and post on a forum, whether you think you can or not.  Yes, you can pick up clues, but even then you don't really KNOW, you are just guessing.  You also can't know if  the person is even telling the truth.  
Personally, I'm a prime example.  Lots of people here have judged and condemned me, yet most of them don't know anything about me and they don't care to know anything about me. They see me type out advice in a blunt manner and choose to call me a troll, or heartless or the c word we can't say here or a *****...I could go on, but I think you get the point and the list is very long. lol   I am who I am and I'm okay with that.  If someone can't accept me for who I am, then I don't want or need them in my life.
 
TheRealCallie said:
Guzheng said:
I'm an INFJ and a Virgo.  I'm also sensitive.  No matter how many labels a person uses to describe themselves online, there's always more things such as idiosyncrasies and pet peeves to discover about a person.  I wouldn't call your labels a fake self; they're just vague hints at your true self, which can take someone a lifetime to fully discover.

The guy said he was humorless - so don't be too surprised if you don't find him funny.

Labels, in my opinion don't really help anyone.  It's just another way to make excuses.  You are, simply put, you.  The only "label" you need is your name.  Everything else doesn't really matter.  People will like you or they won't and in online communities, if people don't like you, more often than not, it's because they don't really know you.  People online like to judge the hell out of anyone not fitting their ideas of who a person should be or not giving the advice they want to hear.  It's bullshit, to be honest.  You can't really know a person by what they type and post on a forum, whether you think you can or not.  Yes, you can pick up clues, but even then you don't really KNOW, you are just guessing.  You also can't know if  the person is even telling the truth.  
Personally, I'm a prime example.  Lots of people here have judged and condemned me, yet most of them don't know anything about me and they don't care to know anything about me. They see me type out advice in a blunt manner and choose to call me a troll, or heartless or the c word we can't say here or a *****...I could go on, but I think you get the point and the list is very long. lol   I am who I am and I'm okay with that.  If someone can't accept me for who I am, then I don't want or need them in my life.

Labels to me are just a rough guide to describe things.  When it comes to people that's where it becomes complicated.  Because the less intelligent and intellectually lazy stick with labels and that's what you are to them.  The nuances of  person only become known if you befriend and get to know them.
But on the internet and social media that's only as good as what the person puts out.  Some of us are better at then others.  I suck at that.  I don't always communicate what I think is the best way to inform the other.  Even with a bit more practice I'm getting marginally better I suppose.  

But self ascribed labels should be taken as a guide.

Branded labels by someone else should be taken with a giant grain of salt and you should reserve judgement till you yourself know all the facts.  Unless you just don't care.  Which sadly seems to be the case for too many these days.
 
Okay, but what about the self ascribed labels such as "ugly" or "worthless" or "incel" or whatever negative aspect them want to put on themselves? Even more scientific labels such as the personality test will make a person worse if they don't get the answer they are looking for. Like "oh, well this says I'm shy and I'm not good with people, so I guess that's it, I'll be that way forever."
You can do whatever you want with you life. Most issues people have can be resolved so the person can do what they think isn't possible. Self ascribed labels are often worse than other labels. Even labels for medical issues people use as excuses. "Oh, I'm autistic, I'll never be able to have friends or be 'normal'" "Oh, I am crippled, people are only going to pity me and won't want anything to do with me"

Find your issues and work to fix them, don't put a label on yourself because that will only keep you in that hole.
 
TheRealCallie said:
Okay, but what about the self ascribed labels such as "ugly" or "worthless" or "incel" or whatever negative aspect them want to put on themselves?  Even more scientific labels such as the personality test will make a person worse if they don't get the answer they are looking for.  Like "oh, well this says I'm shy and I'm not good with people, so I guess that's it, I'll be that way forever."  
You can do whatever you want with you life.  Most issues people have can be resolved so the person can do what they think isn't possible.  Self ascribed labels are often worse than other labels.  Even labels for medical issues people use as excuses.  "Oh, I'm autistic, I'll never be able to have friends or be 'normal'"  "Oh, I am crippled, people are only going to pity me and won't want anything to do with me"  

Find your issues and work to fix them, don't put a label on yourself because that will only keep you in that hole.

Yeah I get that.  People can certainly get stuck on self ascribed labels and get lost or trapped.  We've seen a few of those here on the forum.  Maybe it's just my life experience and my own level of self worth.  I've learned that people will always label you and categorize you no matter what. 
Whether you label yourself something that's still on yourself to take it as far as you want to.  Speaking for myself for example when I 1st started reading about introversion and the Meyers-Brigg Personality tests, etc.   I thought hmmm finally something actually is closer to describing my personality.  Of course newer personality tests got away from the Meyers-Brigg and are more accurate.  So  I don't think of labels as a finite thing.  It's just whatever describes you at the moment.  Communicating intentions and identification and descriptions of ones self is difficult to convey properly.  People want to just stick you in this box and label it and file you away as this.  But human beings are much more complicated and nuanced than that.  And we do that to ourselves too.  It's hard to realize you don't have to be the label and that you can grow.  Life circumstances or being born a certain I know can not always be changed so there is some merit to the self label.

I understand what you're saying.  How people can become too ingrained or associated with the self labeling.  Particularly if it's something negative that affects their lives.  As with recent users here that created  some drama.  They've labeled themselves all sorts of things.  That's something only the individual can fix.  Therapy can help depending on the person.  But yeah others getting caught up in their self defeating label can be draining.  But then that's on you whether you want to involve yourself with them.

Ultimately I feel like it's the persons responsibility how they want to live their life how they want to present themselves.  And some people learn over time to get over those obstacles or they stay stuck.  From the few posts I've read of yours. You're one that got over many difficulties.  So you don't want to get stuck with or too associated with people still stuck in their hells they've labeled themselves with.

Stream of thought.  So please forgive if I missed any points I may not have considered in the moment.
 
PandaSwag said:
TheRealCallie said:
Okay, but what about the self ascribed labels such as "ugly" or "worthless" or "incel" or whatever negative aspect them want to put on themselves?  Even more scientific labels such as the personality test will make a person worse if they don't get the answer they are looking for.  Like "oh, well this says I'm shy and I'm not good with people, so I guess that's it, I'll be that way forever."  
You can do whatever you want with you life.  Most issues people have can be resolved so the person can do what they think isn't possible.  Self ascribed labels are often worse than other labels.  Even labels for medical issues people use as excuses.  "Oh, I'm autistic, I'll never be able to have friends or be 'normal'"  "Oh, I am crippled, people are only going to pity me and won't want anything to do with me"  

Find your issues and work to fix them, don't put a label on yourself because that will only keep you in that hole.

Yeah I get that.  People can certainly get stuck on self ascribed labels and get lost or trapped.  We've seen a few of those here on the forum.  Maybe it's just my life experience and my own level of self worth.  I've learned that people will always label you and categorize you no matter what. 
Whether you label yourself something that's still on yourself to take it as far as you want to.  Speaking for myself for example when I 1st started reading about introversion and the Meyers-Brigg Personality tests, etc.   I thought hmmm finally something actually is closer to describing my personality.  Of course newer personality tests got away from the Meyers-Brigg and are more accurate.  So  I don't think of labels as a finite thing.  It's just whatever describes you at the moment.  Communicating intentions and identification and descriptions of ones self is difficult to convey properly.  People want to just stick you in this box and label it and file you away as this.  But human beings are much more complicated and nuanced than that.  And we do that to ourselves too.  It's hard to realize you don't have to be the label and that you can grow.  Life circumstances or being born a certain I know can not always be changed so there is some merit to the self label.

I understand what you're saying.  How people can become too ingrained or associated with the self labeling.  Particularly if it's something negative that affects their lives.  As with recent users here that created  some drama.  They've labeled themselves all sorts of things.  That's something only the individual can fix.  Therapy can help depending on the person.  But yeah others getting caught up in their self defeating label can be draining.  But then that's on you whether you want to involve yourself with them.

Ultimately I feel like it's the persons responsibility how they want to live their life how they want to present themselves.  And some people learn over time to get over those obstacles or they stay stuck.  From the few posts I've read of yours. You're one that got over many difficulties.  So you don't want to get stuck with or too associated with people still stuck in their hells they've labeled themselves with.

Stream of thought.  So please forgive if I missed any points I may not have considered in the moment.

Humans are extremely complex people, with no one the same as the next person.  Even if two people have exactly the same issues, they still aren't the same because they will react to them differently.  Which is why I try very hard not to place judgment on others.  I can't say I never judge anyone because everyone judges.  But even if I do judge, I still try to allow myself some doubt about my opinions and attempt to see beyond that. 
With anything in life, it's about what the person decides to do.  A therapist won't fix you, they can just listen and give you, not only an outside perspective, but tools you could use to fix your issues.  For that to work, you have to be open to the idea of it working.  In a way, I suppose it is similar to alcoholics and drug addicts.  You have to WANT to get better before you can truly even TRY to get better.  (And no, I'm not say people with depression and anxiety are the same as alcoholics :club: )

As for me, yes, I have overcome a lot in my life and because of that, I know how hard it is.  I also know that sometimes, it doesn't matter what you say, if the person doesn't want to hear it, they won't hear it.  I'm not delusional enough to think I know everything.  I don't.  I'm also not delusional to think advice for any situation is one size fits all.  What worked for me may not work for the next person.  But, what I do know is that without options, you will never find anything that works.  If 10 people give you advice on a situation, none of them may work, but maybe you can see something in all 10 and adapt it to fit your own needs to find something that will work.  I wouldn't say I don't want to be stuck with or deal with people who are stuck.  I have tried to help several people here who have very much appreciated my efforts.  The only thing I tell is that if they aren't going to bother to try, I won't keep trying, because it wastes both of our time.  That's not to say I will stop talking to them completely, I just won't keep trying to help them with things, giving them advice and whatnot.  This is, of course, behind the scenes.  If they were to post a thread, I would likely respond, because even if they aren't ready to get better, maybe someone else reading is.  I don't think anyone is a "lost cause" or a loser.  I think some people are just so stuck and have been for so long they are in denial that there is a way out.  I also think that a lot of people are scared to change because "what if it's not any different." 

Anyway, I'm sure I said something in this post that will piss someone off, but since I'm doing 10 different things right now, I likely didn't say something right.  lol  Meh, it is what it is.  :p
 
TheRealCallie said:
PandaSwag said:
TheRealCallie said:
Okay, but what about the self ascribed labels such as "ugly" or "worthless" or "incel" or whatever negative aspect them want to put on themselves?  Even more scientific labels such as the personality test will make a person worse if they don't get the answer they are looking for.  Like "oh, well this says I'm shy and I'm not good with people, so I guess that's it, I'll be that way forever."  
You can do whatever you want with you life.  Most issues people have can be resolved so the person can do what they think isn't possible.  Self ascribed labels are often worse than other labels.  Even labels for medical issues people use as excuses.  "Oh, I'm autistic, I'll never be able to have friends or be 'normal'"  "Oh, I am crippled, people are only going to pity me and won't want anything to do with me"  

Find your issues and work to fix them, don't put a label on yourself because that will only keep you in that hole.

Yeah I get that.  People can certainly get stuck on self ascribed labels and get lost or trapped.  We've seen a few of those here on the forum.  Maybe it's just my life experience and my own level of self worth.  I've learned that people will always label you and categorize you no matter what. 
Whether you label yourself something that's still on yourself to take it as far as you want to.  Speaking for myself for example when I 1st started reading about introversion and the Meyers-Brigg Personality tests, etc.   I thought hmmm finally something actually is closer to describing my personality.  Of course newer personality tests got away from the Meyers-Brigg and are more accurate.  So  I don't think of labels as a finite thing.  It's just whatever describes you at the moment.  Communicating intentions and identification and descriptions of ones self is difficult to convey properly.  People want to just stick you in this box and label it and file you away as this.  But human beings are much more complicated and nuanced than that.  And we do that to ourselves too.  It's hard to realize you don't have to be the label and that you can grow.  Life circumstances or being born a certain I know can not always be changed so there is some merit to the self label.

I understand what you're saying.  How people can become too ingrained or associated with the self labeling.  Particularly if it's something negative that affects their lives.  As with recent users here that created  some drama.  They've labeled themselves all sorts of things.  That's something only the individual can fix.  Therapy can help depending on the person.  But yeah others getting caught up in their self defeating label can be draining.  But then that's on you whether you want to involve yourself with them.

Ultimately I feel like it's the persons responsibility how they want to live their life how they want to present themselves.  And some people learn over time to get over those obstacles or they stay stuck.  From the few posts I've read of yours. You're one that got over many difficulties.  So you don't want to get stuck with or too associated with people still stuck in their hells they've labeled themselves with.

Stream of thought.  So please forgive if I missed any points I may not have considered in the moment.

Humans are extremely complex people, with no one the same as the next person.  Even if two people have exactly the same issues, they still aren't the same because they will react to them differently.  Which is why I try very hard not to place judgment on others.  I can't say I never judge anyone because everyone judges.  But even if I do judge, I still try to allow myself some doubt about my opinions and attempt to see beyond that. 
With anything in life, it's about what the person decides to do.  A therapist won't fix you, they can just listen and give you, not only an outside perspective, but tools you could use to fix your issues.  For that to work, you have to be open to the idea of it working.  In a way, I suppose it is similar to alcoholics and drug addicts.  You have to WANT to get better before you can truly even TRY to get better.  (And no, I'm not say people with depression and anxiety are the same as alcoholics :club: )

As for me, yes, I have overcome a lot in my life and because of that, I know how hard it is.  I also know that sometimes, it doesn't matter what you say, if the person doesn't want to hear it, they won't hear it.  I'm not delusional enough to think I know everything.  I don't.  I'm also not delusional to think advice for any situation is one size fits all.  What worked for me may not work for the next person.  But, what I do know is that without options, you will never find anything that works.  If 10 people give you advice on a situation, none of them may work, but maybe you can see something in all 10 and adapt it to fit your own needs to find something that will work.  I wouldn't say I don't want to be stuck with or deal with people who are stuck.  I have tried to help several people here who have very much appreciated my efforts.  The only thing I tell is that if they aren't going to bother to try, I won't keep trying, because it wastes both of our time.  That's not to say I will stop talking to them completely, I just won't keep trying to help them with things, giving them advice and whatnot.  This is, of course, behind the scenes.  If they were to post a thread, I would likely respond, because even if they aren't ready to get better, maybe someone else reading is.  I don't think anyone is a "lost cause" or a loser.  I think some people are just so stuck and have been for so long they are in denial that there is a way out.  I also think that a lot of people are scared to change because "what if it's not any different." 

Anyway, I'm sure I said something in this post that will piss someone off, but since I'm doing 10 different things right now, I likely didn't say something right.  lol  Meh, it is what it is.  :p

Yeah I pretty much agree with what you said.  

I kind of roll with what life gives and hope I navigate it without destroying myself.
 
Likewise, I don't have mental issues. I don't go in for navel-gazing or self-analysis, and just get on with the things that need to be done. Yeah, I'm lonely, but it's a situational thing. I carry on happily as always.
 
Being here and self-proclaiming you don't have mental issues is a clear indicator that you in-fact, DO. And you're only letting your own views or coping that you've developed over the years feed an ego or keep yourself from blaming yourself further. Wouldn't a legitimate sane person not even have to post in here to begin with? Ponder on that please. And sanity is in the eye of the beholder. Like I keep saying, this topic is toxic and stuns any legitimate growth. It shows that we are quick to blame others or harbors hidden insecurities as we post in here to stay vigilant about ourselves. Rather than accept and understand our indifferences....

I can't be the ONLY one to see this? Please... someone tell me I am NOT ******* crazy. As I'm here questioning my own sanity for seeing things for how they are, or am I the crazy one?! And no, I am not sane. Just for the record for anyone who wishes to project themselves onto me instead of absorbing my words proper. And no, this isn't judgement. Everyone has their own justified reasoning or even possible trauma for their feelings. Just stop the unintentional selfish confidence boosting.... PLEASE! It hurts others in the process because it makes anyone who isn't 'like you' feel lesser. Why do we forget that and general common decency during our inner turmoil? Because we know we're seen wrongly... How do you fix that? By being it and learning to realize we're ALL only misunderstanding one another and focusing on the negatives while we say and think we're actually being positive...

STOP and analyze YOUR OWN feelings and projections you create...

And if you strongly feel I'm doing this for selfish reasons or to only help myself when you read this, you're doing it wrong and only proving my point further. Read again, please.
 
I agree with you, siku.  I am not lonely, but I do still have issues.  Everyone has issues, some just haven't realized it yet.  You will have issues all your life, even if they are minor issues.  
Also, sanity is overrated :p

People say I'm cold hearted and selfish and a troll and whatever else, but the truth is that I see both sides of most issues, because I've been on both sides. I choose to speak the truth, as I see it. Not everyone agrees with that, but I am who I am. Lying and coddling does not help, imo, it just makes the problem worse.
 
Siku said:
Being here and self-proclaiming you don't have mental issues is a clear indicator that you in-fact, DO.
...
STOP and analyze YOUR OWN feelings and projections you create...

And if you strongly feel I'm doing this for selfish reasons or to only help myself when you read this, you're doing it wrong and only proving my point further. Read again, please.

I'm not sure if this post is in response to my post, since it comes right after my post. But I was just goofing around with the posts I made on this thread. Partially just to do it, and also in response to....certain things.
 

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