Used to this...

[BrokenShell]

I've always been alone my entire life. Even when i was smaller, my mother would always lock me in a room as she spent the entire day with her friends (Dad was never around). Alot of things happened between that time and now (But i'll save that for another thread). My point is, I'm a reclusive person. I never go out, I hardly ever speak, And the small family relationship i've had with my mother is fading away (Shes sick me of not being "Normal" and i'm sick of her). I spend my days absolutely depressed and alone. It's been like this for so long that i'm used to it....But at the same time i really want some sort of companionship, but i have a huge problem with people. You could even say i hate being around all people. What do you guys think i should do? I've been through several years of therapy and medication, and nothing has worked.

 

[burnout]

I know what you mean, as I child I wasn't allowed to go outside and play and so on and yeah the companionship thing as well, I would like to have people to talk to and hang out but just like you it pretty much seems like I hate to be around people. Unfortuantly I can't really say what you should do since im going through the same thing as you.

 

[ShybutHi]

or just get a pet if you don't have one, a dog then you can walk him and the force of his/her cuteness can give you an easy copout to meeting someone. They also provide undying affection and attention which is awesome because humans suck for the most part.

Yep, people meet others when walking their dogs very often, i guess its something you can relate with if you meet someone you dont know while walking your dog... its nice for companionship too if your lonely and shows you have empathy for other living entities.

I would love a husky they are awesome.

 

[BrokenShell]

Unfortunately, I don't have the money nor means to get a pet. I highly doubt my mom would let me have one, The building i live in doesn't even allow them.

 

[Yukhi]

How old are you by the way? I'm already 19 but my mom doesn't allow me to go out with my friends often. She'd always say why I wanna watch a movie with them when I can watch a movie with the family. I know she had friends when she was young but I don't know why she acts that way. My mom evens keeps my gaming consoles locked up. I really envy the other teens who already have enough freedom to do what they want as long as it doesn't harm others.

I understand the whole thing about having very controlling parents. That can really lead to chronic loneliness. My mom is already saying to me she wants to choose my future partner -_-.

You have to practice to start letting go of your hate for people. I know some others who hate people as well but it doesn't stop them from having close relationships thus I don't think they feel lonely. In your case, if hating people is hindering you from gaining friends, then you have to try to lose some of that hate. Having friends on the internet can be a good start since you're not really "around" people. It's not the same thing though with having friends who you can talk to in real life. I have to admit that before in high school having internet friends took away chunks of my loneliness but it never really gets down to the core and there was always that space inside of me that still felt empty.

About your medication thing, there is so much medication and treatment programs can do but it doesn't solve everything. You have to really experience talking with people. Experience is important. What specific activities are you doing in your treatments?

 

[BrokenShell]

Thanks for your feedback, I'm 17. I have been told many times by different people; exactly what you are telling me right now. It really isn't easy, as everyone I've ever known or counted on in life has betrayed or hurt me in some way. Sometimes i enjoy being alone, when i think of all the pain I'm avoiding, but at the same time i still feel empty. I really dislike talking with people; especially other teenagers over here in NY because most of them are self centered jerks i can't even imagine relating to. I suppose you could say; as my former therapist called it: being "Socially Challenged". As for your last question, I've tried alot of treatments; Such as: taking tons of different medications, being admitted to a few hospitals, going to camps, and trying out "social groups" where you talk with people in a group about your problems. I couldn't even last a day there, because there were too many people there. I started feeling sick, then i left.

 

[csmswhs]

i'm a fool, but i say stick to who you allready are. but make it better. something like that. and all the things that have to do with family, it will all come around again and again, and you'll see things differently.

hang in there and kick a little ass while your at it.