what women want..

[Ladysphinx]

Just thought that something worth mentioning is that when a married or stable relationship person gives advise they are told that their advice is either bad or does not count for thosr still single. But to be married or in a relationship you actaully had to be single at some point, right. So if our advice does not work for those looking for someone should we not then STILL be single. And if you know that our advice WON'T work then in knowing better way are you STILL single. The fact that we are in a stable relationship proves that we DO or DID know what we where doing. After all it is easier to find a date(been on way to many) then actually find and keeping a successful relationship. So in my dating life or what you wanna call it I have hardly ever been single or not have a date, Ive had three long term relationships one didn't last due to unforseen cercomstances, one didn't work because the guy wasn't ready for permantent commitment(marriage), the third one as turned out into 10yrs of marraige. And no I'm not one of those flawless babes, I just learned how to read what the oppesite sex want and used that knowledge to get what I want.

So those in stable relationship clearly have proven their Methodes viable and have also experience as to what ppl are looking for.

 

[tangerinedream]

You know, confidence, whether it is the real kind based on ability and self-respect, or the fake kind propped up by bravado and arrogance, IS eye-catching, but that's where the "attraction" stops for some of us. Sure, it attracts, as in, it draws our notice, but - get this - not all of us are slaves to our primal urges. I've learned some tough lessons when it comes to men and one big one is not to trust the exterior, because it could just be wrapping which masks a rather empty box. Just because a guy can talk the loudest and bang his chest vigorously doesn't mean honeysuckle when it comes to whether or not he is: a good provider, a considerate lover, or even a decent human being.

Some of you guys are still young and your whole focus seems to be getting your dick wet in the hottest imaginable chick... as if it mattered. I think it only matters to the guy and his friends, because it's like some sort of primitive proof that he's got the biggest swinging dick in the jungle.

Good for you. Just don't expect to build a relationship on that, because everyone will leave disappointed.

I can't speak for every woman out there, like some of you are trying to, but I don't give a honeysuckle if my man cries or not. What I do care about is a real emotional connection. I don't want macho bullshit bluster from him as his outer facade, nor do I want it when we're together. Frankly, I've met enough macho ******** who are all noise and no substance. What I want is GENUINE FEELING, not some stupid-ass wrapping that society dictates is what I should want because of "biology."

Give me a ******* break. We've evolved past the gibbon stage, people. If you want to be superficial, then embrace it wholeheartedly and don't cop out with some lame excuse, "Oh, it's my biology that made me want the chick with the big rack!" fresia's sake. Say, "I just like 'em big," or "All my buddies like them, I guess I should too."

 

[Joseph]

It's evolution. Many men pull it off.

Good thing I'm not trying to pick you up. I'm pretty sure that qualifies as a virtual drink-in-the-face.

I think you're making it more complicated than it needs to be.

The larger point here is that until and unless two people meet who truly value monogamy more than their primal urges, it is all doomed to fail.

Really? I thought I made it pretty simple. I am quite confident in the validity of the above statement. Almost seems like common sense to me.

Having morals and a higher self outside of one's animalistic urges: some might call that evolution, many women pull it off.

 

[Ladysphinx]

You know, confidence, whether it is the real kind based on ability and self-respect, or the fake kind propped up by bravado and arrogance, IS eye-catching, but that's where the "attraction" stops for some of us. Sure, it attracts, as in, it draws our notice, but - get this - not all of us are slaves to our primal urges. I've learned some tough lessons when it comes to men and one big one is not to trust the exterior, because it could just be wrapping which maske a rather empty box. Just because a guy can talk the loudest and bang his chest vigorously doesn't mean honeysuckle when it comes to whether or not he is: a good provider, a considerate lover, or even a decent human being.

Some of you guys are still young and your whole focus seems to be getting your dick wet in the hottest imaginable chick... as if it mattered. I think it only matters to the guy and his friends, because it's like some sort of primitive proof that he's got the biggest swinging dick in the jungle.

Good for you. Just don't expect to build a relationship on that, because everyone will leave disappointed.

I can't speak for every woman out there, like some of you are trying to, but I don't give a honeysuckle if my man cries or not. What I do care about is a real emotional connection. I don't want macho bullshit bluster from him as his outer facade, nor do I want it when we're together. Frankly, I've met enough macho ******** who are all noise and no substance. What I want is GENUINE FEELING, not some stupid-ass wrapping that society dictates is what I should want because of "biology."

Give me a ******* break. We've evolved past the gibbon stage, people. If you want to be superficial, then embrace it wholeheartedly and don't cop out with some lame excuse, "Oh, it's my biology that made me want the chick with the big rack!" fresia's sake. Say, "I just like 'em big," or "All my buddies like them, I guess I should too."

Love your post and agree with you completely.

---

If you don't agree with this prostitutes are great substitutes if you are struggling in the dating world.

 

[Joseph]

So speaking in cavepeople terms, women want their own rape-and-pillager who will stop raping-and-pillaging and protect them from the other rape-and-pillagers, yet from time to time still show rape-and-pillage personality characteristics, while on other occasions maybe cry a little?

I want a supermodel with a genius sized brain and a heart of gold who cooks all my meals and smokes my pole every morning! You know, I could see where thinking like this would be quite self-limiting.

 

[tangerinedream]

So speaking in cavepeople terms, women want their own rape-and-pillager who will stop raping-and-pillaging and protect them from the other rape-and-pillagers, yet from time to time still show rape-and-pillage personality characteristics, while on other occasions maybe cry a little?

I want a supermodel with a genius sized brain and a heart of gold who cooks all my meals and smokes my pole every morning! You know, I could see where thinking like this would be quite self-limiting.

It's ridiculous.

---

Love your post and agree with you completely.

Thanks!

If you don't agree with this prostitutes are great substitutes if you are struggling in the dating world.

lol

 

[Joseph]

If you don't agree with this prostitutes are great substitutes if you are struggling in the dating world.

There's a difference? I hadn't noticed.

I beat the system. I quit trying to buy the cow a long time ago. Somehow the more I act like an ass, the more they hand me delicious cups of milk.

 

[Ladysphinx]

I'm really getting a vibe of self sabotaging when reading the cynical post replies in this thread.
I'm starting to understand why some are doomed to a live of being lonely and single.

Think about this if you want a cold drink you don't add water, but ice tough ice is actually just a different form of water. The ice will eventually melt INTO water though you don't want to pour water in it's still fine. But if you don't want the water don't add the ice, but you will have to accept drinking a warm drink, your choice.

Hopefully you'll get what I'm trying to tell you here.

 

[tangerinedream]

If you don't agree with this prostitutes are great substitutes if you are struggling in the dating world.

There's a difference? I hadn't noticed.

Yeah there is a difference. It's the difference between being there physically and being there emotionally.

But if you're enjoying yourself and are happy to stay that way, then go for it. Just call it by the right name.

 

[Mary Mary]

It's evolution. Many men pull it off.

Good thing I'm not trying to pick you up. I'm pretty sure that qualifies as a virtual drink-in-the-face.

I think you're making it more complicated than it needs to be.

The larger point here is that until and unless two people meet who truly value monogamy more than their primal urges, it is all doomed to fail.

Really? I thought I made it pretty simple. I am quite confident in the validity of the above statement. Almost seems like common sense to me.

Having morals and a higher self outside of one's animalistic urges: some might call that evolution, many women pull it off.

You're mindlessly pontificating without taking the time to understand what I'm saying. Do you have any idea what specific behaviors I'm even talking about? Further, much of what I say is built on the advice of men who're successful at dating women.

Is it reasonable to expect men to totally disregard how a woman looks when he's dating? He may be able to lower his standards to expand his dating pool or to better take into account character, but how many men can totally disregard looks? I don't judge them for it. It's how they're designed via hundreds of thousands of years of evolution.

The same is true for women. We're hardwired to find certain characteristics attractive. It's just the way it is. I harp on these characteristics because the men here don't need lectures on the importance of good character. They already know it's important. However, some men here can't get dates, and they have no idea why.

Finally, the behaviors that I encourage men here to consider, most men do it intuitively to some extent. That's why the average man gets dates.

---

So speaking in cavepeople terms, women want their own rape-and-pillager who will stop raping-and-pillaging and protect them from the other rape-and-pillagers, yet from time to time still show rape-and-pillage personality characteristics, while on other occasions maybe cry a little?

I want a supermodel with a genius sized brain and a heart of gold who cooks all my meals and smokes my pole every morning! You know, I could see where thinking like this would be quite self-limiting.

Who the hell's talking about raping and pillaging?

Straw man argument.

 

[jales]

The larger point here is that until and unless two people meet who truly value monogamy more than their primal urges, it is all doomed to fail.

monogamy is also a primal urge

 

[Mary Mary]

The larger point here is that until and unless two people meet who truly value monogamy more than their primal urges, it is all doomed to fail.

THIS IS THE KEY.

People who can't control their primal urges aren't truly emotionally mature or very wise. Why would you want to be with someone like that? There are plenty of people out there who HAVE grown up and understand that self-discipline and self-control are in the long run worth more than the fleeting pleasure one gets from randomly chasing their natural whims.

They're called loners. How's that working out for you?

 

[Joseph]

You're mindlessly pontificating without taking the time to understand what I'm saying. Do you have any idea what specific behaviors I'm even talking about? Further, much of what I say is built on the advice of men who're successful at dating women.

Whatever gets you through the day, Hon. You've pegged me for another socially inept eunuch who is bitter because I can't get laid. If that's the case, then you are talking to somebody else because you certainly aren't speaking to me.

Is it reasonable to expect men to totally disregard how a woman looks when he's dating?

Did I suggest this or reference this point in even a vague way? I'm lost.

He may be able to lower his standards to expand his dating pool or to better take into account character, but how many men can totally disregard looks?

"Lower His Standards", those are your words and not mine. I don't see it that way. Thanks for clearing up how you see things. Virtually all of my standards are based on what is inside.

I don't judge them for it. It's how they're designed via hundreds of thousands of years of evolution.

Great. So you believe that people are a product of their evolution solely and not their own intellect and higher selves. Again, your words, not mine. You're doing good this morning! Need another bullet to shoot yourself in the foot?

The same is true for women. We're hardwired to find certain characteristics attractive. It's just the way it is. I harp on these characteristics because the men here don't need lectures on the importance of good character. They already know it's important. However, some men here can't get dates, and they have no idea why.

Again, you've completely lost me. I was not talking about men not being able to get dates, nor was I arguing with evolution and it's effects. I was simply stating that there are two types of ways a man can act, and each will get him something different. This is a point you've made over and over, verbatim almost. All I did was draw the conclusion that it rarely ends well as women are not satisfied with what they have, because they always want what they don't have. This is evidence by your own words. Some times I want an alpha male (don't cry) and others I want a beta male (cry). Sorry you don't like the things this makes you consider about yourself and your own nature. Don't blame me for your defensiveness.

Finally, the behaviors that I encourage men here to consider, most men do it intuitively to some extent. That's why the average man gets dates.

Wow. You've really got a mental image worked up on me, don't you? I don't need dates. I've slept with too many to count.

 

[Mary Mary]

Just thought that something worth mentioning is that when a married or stable relationship person gives advise they are told that their advice is either bad or does not count for thosr still single. But to be married or in a relationship you actaully had to be single at some point, right. So if our advice does not work for those looking for someone should we not then STILL be single. And if you know that our advice WON'T work then in knowing better way are you STILL single. The fact that we are in a stable relationship proves that we DO or DID know what we where doing. After all it is easier to find a date(been on way to many) then actually find and keeping a successful relationship. So in my dating life or what you wanna call it I have hardly ever been single or not have a date, Ive had three long term relationships one didn't last due to unforseen cercomstances, one didn't work because the guy wasn't ready for permantent commitment(marriage), the third one as turned out into 10yrs of marraige. And no I'm not one of those flawless babes, I just learned how to read what the oppesite sex want and used that knowledge to get what I want.

So those in stable relationship clearly have proven their Methodes viable and have also experience as to what ppl are looking for.

The advice I give is for men from men. I haven't said this in a while, so I'll say it again. If you're a man who's trying to date women, talk to men who have success at dating women.

I always wonder by someone would come on a message board for loners asking for relationship/dating advice.

Also, not all long term relationships are healthy. I have seen couples who've been married for decades that get along fabulously. I'd take advice from them.

 

[LGH1288]

Someone please pass the popcorn...

 

[Poueff]

Someone please pass the popcorn...

*hands popcorn package*

Well,I agree with Joseph,and I found it weird that no one answered to my comment earlier. Transforming into a bipolar guy who is the prime character of a movie made by women to women,aka the "ideal" guy doesn't happen and it's fake,and if it would,you'd probably just get tired of him,head to a bar and get a new one,and I've seen lots of cases like this.

Btw,Mary,if you don't like a popular singer's voice and say he sucks,then by your basis you should sing better than him to say that. And that doesn't make sense. Like I said,it's like saying a guitarist sucks when you don't know how to play guitar -_-

 

[Mary Mary]

You're mindlessly pontificating without taking the time to understand what I'm saying. Do you have any idea what specific behaviors I'm even talking about? Further, much of what I say is built on the advice of men who're successful at dating women.

Whatever gets you through the day, Hon. You've pegged me for another socially inept eunuch who is bitter because I can't get laid. If that's the case, then you are talking to somebody else because you certainly aren't speaking to me.

Is it reasonable to expect men to totally disregard how a woman looks when he's dating?

Did I suggest this or reference this point in even a vague way? I'm lost.

He may be able to lower his standards to expand his dating pool or to better take into account character, but how many men can totally disregard looks?

"Lower His Standards", those are your words and not mine. I don't see it that way. Thanks for clearing up how you see things. Virtually all of my standards are based on what is inside.

I don't judge them for it. It's how they're designed via hundreds of thousands of years of evolution.

Great. So you believe that people are a product of their evolution solely and not their own intellect and higher selves. Again, your words, not mine. You're doing good this morning! Need another bullet to shoot yourself in the foot?

The same is true for women. We're hardwired to find certain characteristics attractive. It's just the way it is. I harp on these characteristics because the men here don't need lectures on the importance of good character. They already know it's important. However, some men here can't get dates, and they have no idea why.

Again, you've completely lost me. I was not talking about men not being able to get dates, nor was I arguing with evolution and it's effects. I was simply stating that there are two types of ways a man can act, and each will get him something different. This is a point you've made over and over, verbatim almost. All I did was draw the conclusion that it rarely ends well as women are not satisfied with what they have, because they always want what they don't have. This is evidence by your own words. Some times I want an alpha male (don't cry) and others I want a beta male (cry). Sorry you don't like the things this makes you consider about yourself and your own nature. Don't blame me for your defensiveness.

Finally, the behaviors that I encourage men here to consider, most men do it intuitively to some extent. That's why the average man gets dates.

Wow. You've really got a mental image worked up on me, don't you? I don't need dates. I've slept with too many to count.

---

So speaking in cavepeople terms, women want their own rape-and-pillager who will stop raping-and-pillaging and protect them from the other rape-and-pillagers, yet from time to time still show rape-and-pillage personality characteristics, while on other occasions maybe cry a little?

I want a supermodel with a genius sized brain and a heart of gold who cooks all my meals and smokes my pole every morning! You know, I could see where thinking like this would be quite self-limiting.

Who the hell's talking about raping and pillaging?

Straw man argument.

---

[/quote]

Whatever. I'm only talking about dating and sexual attraction.

For those of us in the western world where we don't have arranged marriages, sexual attraction is the gateway into a romantic relationships--unfortunately since what is required of one has nothing to do with the other. It's just the way it is.

---

Btw,Mary,if you don't like a popular singer's voice and say he sucks,then by your basis you should sing better than him to say that. And that doesn't make sense. Like I said,it's like saying a guitarist sucks when you don't know how to play guitar -_-

I'm sorry. What does this mean?

 

[Joseph]

Nonchalant aloofness > Create an emotional spike > ***** shield > Be unphased > honeysuckle test > Redirect/Ignore > Reframe > Display high social value > Possibly some slight kino escalation, mixed with a little Push/Pull = Panties on the floor

 

[Mary Mary]

Nonchalant aloofness > Create an emotional spike > ***** shield > Be unphased > honeysuckle test > Redirect/Ignore > Reframe > Display high social value > Possibly some slight kino escalation, mixed with a little Push/Pull = Panties on the floor

It's all a cruel cosmic joke.

 

[jales]

@Poueff you were exactly right with what you said in your first comment.

I do not think any man should change himself into anything, I was just point out that that movie created what appeared to be the perfect man, and that Noah's character is in many ways what many women want. Do not ever try to become Noah or any other character or person. Always just be you. But still it is interesting to observe what women seem to want in a male.

@Joesph, you are also right with that cavepeople analogy, what we want sounds silly, but there is good reason behind it. We may not always get what we want, and that is okay... but do you agree that it is what we want? And do you agree that there is good reason behind it? And do you agree that it is not a jerk that we want but rather honesty?

___________________________________________________________________________________________________

@Mary Mary I agree with you about some people being in long relationships and they still are no better at in than people who have never been in a relationship (my parents..well my dad).