Where did I go so wrong?

[Code S.O.L]

So tonight on facebook, I saw an ultrasound of my best friend's girl's baby. I should be happy for them. And don't get me wrong, I am happy for them. But upon looking at that ultrasound, a thought occured to me. This is the same guy who was essentially my only friend in highschool-my only real friend to this day. The same guy that used to hang out with me and play video games. We're both in our mid 20's, and he has a strong career, a faithful soon-to-be-wife, a house under construction, ambitions for the future, and now...... a family. Me....... well I still work part time, still live with one parent. And I'm still playing video games.

I should be happy, but I'm kinda sad for two reasons. His new house will be far away into the countryside. With him and his girl gone, it more or less means that all my social activity will remain on forums now. It's also forced me to look back on the past, and wonder why our lives turned out so differently. He'd always been ambitious. Determined to do whatever it took to get what he wanted-and **** anyone that got in his way. While I've been happy to just coast along and grab whatever floated my way. Guess I'm starting to pay for it now. So while he secures a legacy and a future for his family, the best I can manage is to hopefully earn a big enough paycheck to finally leave the nest and scrape along comfortably without any assistance. But nothing more.

I should be happy for them, and yet here I am thinking only of myself. Truly, I'm an incorigable human being........

 

[Sci-Fi]

It's human nature to reflect on what others have and you don't, there's nothing wrong with you.

 

[Tiina63]

I agree with SciFi. It is natural that you are sad when you compare your own life to your friend's life as he has, at least at present, more going for him. Also, you are going to miss him when he moves, so it is a double blow.
However, on the plus side, you are still very young and have time to build a life for yourself. Many people coast along in their twenties, so you are not unusual in this.

 

[LoneKiller]

It might not mean a lot to you, but there are people out there who would love to have what you think you don't.

 

[Limlim]

The good news is it doesnt take that long to get on track if that's the sort of life that you want. A few years is nothing in the grand scheme of things.

 

[maybelazy]

Be kind to yourself pal. I get that it's not easy when you see people who've gotten everything they've wanted, but it doesn't mean you won't get what you want someday.

There's a bit of a song I love: "Don't waste your time on jealousy. Sometimes you're ahead, sometimes you're behind. The race is long and, in the end, it's only with yourself.
Read more at http://www.songmeanings.net/songs/view/78622/#EuW3ovlcZKCRe5u7.99"

I'm not saying its easy, but there's enough negative stuff in the world without piling it on yourself.

 

[ShadowMan2898]

I think we'll all get what we want eventually, but it may or may not be what we expect. Does this help, Mr. OP?

 

[Code S.O.L]

It might not mean a lot to you, but there are people out there who would love to have what you think you don't.

One man's trash is another's treasure. I have no doubt that somepeople think I'm living the life, coasting along carefree and easy playing video games. I'm not gonna lie. It is an easy life. But there's also alot of persecution that comes with it. Society would deem me as worthless for travelling this path, having not groomed myself into a worthwhile mate(be it physically, socially, careerwise, whatever). And breaking the stigma at this point is next to impossible.

 

[Ak5]

What kind of stigma? There is none as far as I know of.

Why can't you have that sort of life? You just got to work at it. You might get lucky and put little effort into it, you might get unlucky and you might have to put a lot of effort in. But there is nothing stopping you.

A janitor graduated from an Ivy League school. Come on, a janitor! That type of work is considered one of the lowest of the low in today's society. Find a full-time job, work out, work on being more social.

Do it.

 

[dannyr22]

I feel the same way, OP

I have fallen behind most of my school year in terms of building a life. However we have to try & concentrate on our own lives instead of looking at others. But it's hard.

 

[AFrozenSoul]

:/ well I for one never feel happy for people. The most they get is a Good for you from me. It is not your job to feel something for them. They are already feeling something... then again I have no interest in childbirth or marriage or anything like that.

Only you can see where your life took a turn down a different path. I wish I could help you with that one.

 

[ardour]

You're only 25!

 

[Rayri]

That type of mannerism won't change anything ! Yes, i know it is saddening that your friend will move so far away. Phone and online communication just isn't the same as "in person" conversations. Also, it is okay for you to feel this way. Don't just push your emotions away. They need to be acknowledged too. Bottling them up can lead to depression. Then there's the other option-make a change. Yes, you look ahead and feel that it's impossible. Trust me, it isn't. Live in the moment. Go for it ! It will be difficult but things work out. We all have big changes in our lives that are more or less a second chance. ={D