My problem, and probably many people's problem, is that we have negative self talk. Instead of saying to ourselves or thinking we are honeysuckle, stupid, ugly, etc, etc, etc we should be saying we are great, wonderful, kind, funny, interesting, loveable, etc, etc, etc. It's not like anybody else is going to hear us.
But, it's a trap that's hard to get out of though. I tried a few times and end up back in the hole.